White Room
by Winter Gray
Summary: John is killed leaving Sam 10, Dean 14 to fend for themselves without a lifeline in the city. Dean sacrifices everything for his brother destroying himself in the process. Sam must find his brother salvation as their feelings for each other grow. Memory Loss, Wincest, Destiel, non-con, prostitution, first time. Castiel, Dick Roman as a sexual predator.
1. White Room

**I don't own anything related to Supernatural or the characters, any songs referenced I don't own and only use to set a tone for the chapter. This is pretty dark like a lot of my stories so if you don't like Wincest, reading about someone self destructing, substance abuse, homosexuality or prostitution you might want to stop reading right here. Castiel as a kind virgin angel trick that hires Dean, Dick Roman as a cold, cruel trick that also hires Dean.**

**Redemption is a long, hard road so it's your choice to take the journey with Sam and Dean or not. **

"**Big White Room" by Jessie J sets the tone for the story and what Dean feels inside as he slips away.**

…

Sitting in a big white room alone,  
Tilt my head and feel the tears roll down.  
Cause my eyes can't see in the dark,  
I feel numb, broken, and so so scared.  
I don't wanna be here anymore,  
I wanna be somewhere else,  
Roaming free, like I used to be.  
But I have to stay in this big white room,  
With little old me...  
I'm going crazy,  
I'm losing my mind.  
I'm going crazy,  
In this big white room of mine.  
Sitting in a big white room alone,  
Close the door,  
Don't want the pain to come in.  
I catch my tears,  
And try to stay strong.  
I cry, but feel sick.  
My heart is beating out of control.  
Can I run more faster than you?

John was packed and ready to go, he looked around the apartment that consisted of two rooms. There was a tiny bathroom and the rest was a couch that folded out, a kitchenette and two windows overlooking the alley. The one luxury, if you could call it that, was a an old TV that got exactly two channels, one in Spanish and one that only seemed to carry local news.

If Sam and Dean were lucky on the weekends they had a fishing program and if Sam got up early enough he caught a few cartoons while he ate a bowl of Happy O's with sugar packets Dean stole from a diner during a rare breakfast out.

"Ok guys you got everything you need?"

Dean hugged his dad, "I don't know why we can't come with you, besides you're gonna miss Sam's birthday…a kid only turns ten once in a lifetime you know."

John grabbed Sam and messed up his hair, "You forgive me right?"

"Sure dad you missed Deans so why should I be special?" Sam was being sarcastic but John never picked up on it. He grabbed his bags and made Dean go over the check list, "We got a bus map, a credit card and two IDs …um…knives, ammo and one revolver."

John gave him twenty dollars cash, "It's not much but the credit card should still be good for a couple weeks. The room is paid up for a month I'll be back before that and here Dean," he handed the boy the Impala keys, "your only fourteen so no driving unless you have to," he handed Dean a card with a local address and phone number, "A buddy of mine stored her for me, I don't want her parked out on the street or in an alley."

Dean held them up like he just found the Holy Grail, "You're serious?"

"I mean it Dean, emergencies only. I'm getting a ride from a hunter heading out on the same job, we're meeting up with a couple other guys. Ok you got my number, I'll see you both in about a week, remember you got a couple weeks of school left…Dean."

Dean gave his dad an innocent look, "What, right away you look at me! Sam could skip to you know."

Sam back kicked him in the butt, "Not likely, dads on to you." Dean gave him a shove onto the sofa bed, "Don't kick me Sam."

John watched them both and wondered if the two would kill each other in the course of a week but then he saw Sam grin at his brother and Dean gave Sam a wink, all was right with the world, " I love you guys."

They both chimed in, "Love you too dad." Sam was already at the window watching his dad hop in a beat up old Ford truck and leave. Dean was lying on the sofa bed reading a comic book he must have read a hundred times. Sam jumped on the bed next to him and turned on the fan, it was spring but the heat was already oppressive.

John had kept them in one spot long enough for the boys to finish out a school year and he promised the next place would be out of the city. Dean hated being stuck there, he was used to the road and school meant little to him. Sam on the other hand craved education and stability.

Sam snatched the comic away, "What are you reading Dean?" Dean grabbed it back, rolled it up and smacked him with it, "The one stupid comic book between us what do you think?"

Sam reached under the mattress and pulled out a skin mag, "Dad left this." Dean took it away and dropped the centerfold open, "whoa I didn't know he had this! Wow look at that…pretty nice right Sammy?"

Sam looked at her with curiosity and little else, "She's ok I guess, I don't think about that stuff like you do." Dean folded it back up and shoved it under the mattress, "Well your turning ten tomorrow so I suppose you don't."

Sam was walking his feet up the dirty wall and back down again then rolled on his stomach, he shoved his foot in Dean's back and shoved him laughing, "I bet you never did anything anyway."

"Shut up Sam, I've done stuff."

"Like what?"

"Like kissing and touching…I touched a boob."

Sam made a face, "Weird...over or under a bra?"

Dean was feeling embarrassed now, he talked a big game but at fourteen hadn't done a lot, he knew it was pointless to lie to Sam because his little brother could always tell when he was full of bullshit. "Over."

Sam started laughing and an angry Dean sat on him, "Stop laughing!"

"It's funny Dean, everyone thinks you're such a big deal. It's ok I don't think I'd want to sleep with you if you had sex, something gross might crawl on me." Sam started giggling again and Dean jammed his fingers in his brothers arm pits tickling him and making it worse.

"Sam you are such a bitch sometimes maybe tomorrow you can sit at home for your birthday."

Sam stopped laughing and grabbed Dean by the shirt, "Noooo come on Dean you promised we could do something fun." Dean fished out the twenty dollars John left them, "Twenty bucks worth of fun …what can we do with that?"

Dean got off and sat there staring at the twenty willing it to turn into a fifty, Sam rested his head in his brother's lap, " Pizza, cake and ice cream. I don't care as long as we do something, I'm so bored here I hate the city."

Dean pushed all the hair off Sam's face, "oh that's what you look like. Maybe we can get you a haircut tomorrow so people can tell you're a boy." Sam finger combed it back over his eyes, "Shut up I like my hair, you don't have any."

Dean ran his hands over the close cut, "Hey if you're hunting you don't want some monster to have something extra to grab right?"

Sam sighed, "I guess not…I'm hungry what we have left?" Dean looked in the fridge, "Beer, peanut butter, jelly and half a loaf of bread." Dean looked in the cupboard, "Cereal but no milk…cool we have some potato chips left!"

Sam covered up his face and groaned, "Yuck…well I'll mix some of the jelly with the cereal and peanut butter, we can pretend it's a bowl of doughnuts right?" That's just what they did and somehow that glop didn't taste so bad to them.

Sam dipped his fingers in the bowl then licked them off, "With some imagination and a good attitude I might not even barf this up."

Dean made a face, "Can you loan me some of that Sammy because I think I'm about to." Dean gave up and polished off the chips instead.

…..

Dean had change in his pocket, "Hey I got enough for a load of laundry, you got anything you need washed for school?" Sam gathered up their socks, underwear, and anything else they deemed filthy, they both stripped and stuffed it all in a bag.

Laundry night meant everything went in because they just had a couple changes of clothes so the boys would wait until the middle of the night, wrap towels around themselves and sneak down to do a load so everything was clean for the next week.

They made a game of it, slinking through the halls being as quiet as mice in the dim light then pounding down the stairs trying not to laugh, Sam was quicker but that only meant he lost his towel every time when Dean snatched it off and waved it in the air teasing him for streaking.

"Give it back Dean!"

"Come and get it Sam," Dean tossed the bag to the bottom and ran down past Sam with his brother in hot pursuit, they made it to the stark white laundry room with the flickering light and started a load. Dean tossed in Sam's towel and started laughing.

"God you are such a jerk Dean." His big brother could push all his buttons and Sam fell for it every time, he stood there frustrated covering himself with a magazine refusing to acknowledge him. This bothered Dean because he couldn't stand it when Sam didn't give him attention.

"Here wear mine you baby." He tossed his towel in Sam's face and hopped up on the table buck naked waiting for the load to get done. Sam made a face, "Gross thanks for the ass towel." He gratefully wrapped it around his waist and hopped up next to his brother.

Dean called his dad while they waited and it went to voice mail, "Dad just checking in, you should have called by now so let me know if you got there ok…um…so anyway love you bye."

Sam looked up at him worried, "He should have called by now…Dean he always calls right?"

"Hey dad can handle himself, he's fine." They sat there quietly both lost in their own thoughts and were surprised when the washer went off, the brothers didn't realize they had been down there that long.

"Dean do we have enough for the dryer?"

Dean spread the coins out, "Yeah for one round, we have to hang em after that."

…

The next morning Sam was up early jiggling the bed trying to wake his brother up without actually touching him, Dean opened one eye and sighed, "You want me up right..need that birthday spanking?"

"No I want breakfast and tonight I want pizza, cake and ice cream."

"That's gonna cost you Sammy." Sam squealed and tried to escape but Dean clamped onto his ankle and dragged the squirming, laughing ten year old over his lap. He leaned an elbow over his back and pinned Sam down, "Stop wiggling!"

Sam slapped his leg, "Let go perv." Dean let him go and sat there, "Fine get off me." Sam stopped moving and rested his head on his arms, "Just get it over with or I know I'll get it later."

"Nope you ruined the moment, no birthday spanking."

Sam wiggled his butt, "I'm not moving."

Dean yanked down his boxers and gave him ten hard slaps as Sam started screaming and laughing. Dean unceremoniously pushed him off and got up, "Jesus Sam the whole building is going to think I'm killing you!" He put on his jeans and tossed a clean t shirt to his brother, "Get dressed and I'll spring for a real breakfast."

….

Sam blew bubbles in his milk and watched his brother over his glass, "What are you looking at Sam?"

"Nothing…you look nice today."

"Weird…sure whatever I look nice."

The waitress came with their food, "So where is that father of yours today?" Dean gave her his sweetest smile, "Working ma'am."

The pretty brunette tapped her name tag, "Well tell him Julie says hello and I still owe him that dessert."

Sam made a face, "Gross she means sex."

Dean kicked him under that table, "Yeah sure I'll tell him."

They watched her walk away, "Geez Sam don't say everything that pops in your head!" Sam pointed a breakfast link at him, "Dad is sleeping with her."

"So what?"

"So yuck that's what, what are we going to do today?"

Dean looked at the twenty dollars, "Well after I pay for this I think we should have about ten bucks left, enough for pizza and ice cream for supper or what we should really do is get you new underwear and socks."

"Can't dad scam a new credit card and we can use the one we got at the ATM?

"Sam scam is such an ugly word…but yeah scam some new ones. Before this expires we can take some out but let's try to wait until dad gets back. It's for emergencies."

They sat there eating their breakfast both polishing off every single bite. When the waitress came back she asked if there was anything else.

Dean sat there looking up at her with big, soulful green eyes, "Today is Sammy's tenth birthday. I wish dad was here, he always gets us pie and ice cream to celebrate but…"

Dean let his voice drift off and looked down at the table while Sam played his part and sadly rested his head on the table looking at her like a lost puppy.

She looked at them both and started to tear up, "You know what, breakfast is on me, happy birthday Sam! I'll be right back."

She came back with two pieces of pie topped with vanilla ice cream and set them down, "You boys have a good day now ok?" They both said in unison "Thank you!"

Dean started shoveling it in and Sam ate his slowly, "I wanted cake and ice cream."

"Well you got free pie and that's the best pie there is so suck it up and eat it."

…..

They spent the rest of the day walking around window shopping together until Dean suggested Dumpster diving, "No way Dean you always put me in there to look around."

"Sam think of all the cool things we find though, look you go in and I promise you can shower when we get back and I'll do your laundry, even your shoes swear to god."

They found some magazines, a perfectly good jacket and a broken radio Dean was going to try to fix. By the time Dean fished his brother out Sam stunk and was covered in things they both had no desire to identify.

True to his word Dean stripped Sam, stuck him in the shower and washed his clothes since they still had the twenty dollars. Dean ran to the corner store and bought a little cake and a quart of ice cream then came back and ordered Sam a pizza with the toppings he liked the best.

When Sam got out of the shower he saw the cake and jumped on the bed excited, "I want cake now!"

"Tough, I ordered pizza, we eat that first."

Sam jumped on Deans back and wrapped his arms and legs around him, "Pizza? Wow you're the best Dean!"

Dean turned in circles trying to loosen the wet, naked monkey on his back but when Sam held on to Dean he never let go.

…..

Sam ran to the door when there was a knock, "Is it the pizza guy?" Dean walked up behind him, wrapped a towel around his waist and flicked his ear, "Seriously Sam you don't say it like that and you don't answer the door in the nude. Who is it?"

"Its Rick…I was hunting with John… is Dean there?"

Dean took the safety off and opened the door, "Where's dad?" Rick looked down at Sam then back to Dean, "Can I talk to you alone?"

Dean looked down at the jacket he was holding, it was torn and stained with dried blood, "Sam you stay here I'll be back."

TBC

**(New story here so your reviews and thoughts are appreciated thanks)**


	2. Set In Motion

Rick brought Dean out to his truck to talk about John, they sat in the dark with Dean afraid to ask and Rick afraid to tell. After several minutes of silence Dean blurted out, "Is dad dead?"

Rick had tears rolling down his cheeks and wiped his face with the back of his sleeve, "I'm so sorry Dean…it was a nest and everything went wrong, before we all knew it we lost three men including your dad. There just aren't words for how…oh hell your poor kids!"

Dean sat there staring out the window trying to wrap his mind around it all, what to do, how to tell Sam and a million questions floating inside his head. "Is there a body, can we bury him or ...I don't know what to do Rick."

"I'm sorry Dean the only thing I have is his jacket and gear to give you, they took him away. Look I'll keep his car stored right where it is and you can have it anytime. The most important thing is do you and Sam have a place to go? I can call social services until we can work out a place to put you both."

"No…no way they are going to separate us, don't worry I'll work it out somehow."

"Kid your only fourteen there's nothing to work out, you both need a place to stay."

Deans worse fear was to lose Sam above all else and at that point he would have said anything to make sure that didn't happen, "Actually we have someplace, just promise me you'll hang on to dads car and I can get it any time right?"

Rick handed him a card, "Here is my info if you boys need anything, I can't take you in myself but like I said I can call and get you in the system."

"Not an option forget it."

…

Dean took his dads gear to the room but brought the jacket to the laundry room and tossed it in the wash hoping to get the blood out, it was something of Johns that was personal and Dean wanted to hang onto it.

He went back and sat down with Sam trying to find the best way to say it but nothing seemed right.

Sam sat on the floor and went through Johns gear bag and finally looked up at his brother, "Dad isn't coming home is he Dean?"

"No Sammy he's not…dad is…"

"Shut up Dean its not true! You said dad is the best hunter ever and nothing can get him so that guy is a liar."

"Sam I don't know what to say I'm trying to hold it together here."

Sam got up and tried to leave but Dean stopped him, he struggled and kicked, crying until he was exhausted. Dean held him feeling the hiccups coming, all Dean wanted to do was scream, break whatever he got his hands on but he couldn't. All he could do was rub his brothers back and rock him.

…

Dean put on the TV for background noise and actually found the Spanish soothing to listen to like music. He went to the laundry room and pulled out Johns jacket from the wash and held it up, he could see the rips clearly now and the fabric was still stained. He put it in the dryer and sat there by himself on the folding table and began to cry.

He fell asleep somehow and Sam shook him awake, his voice sounded small to Dean and the boys face was blotchy and tear stained, "Come on up Dean I'm lonely…I don't want to stay up there without you."

Dean sat up and looked at the dryer with the jacket, he didn't want Sam to see the condition it was in, "Sammy do me a favor and microwave me some of that pizza we got and I'll be right up." Sam walked back up, shoulders slumped and head down. When he was out of sight Dean jumped off and took out the jacket folding it carefully and tucking it under his arm.

….

Dean went in and quickly tucked it under the mattress while Sam was heating the pizza. He came over and handed it to Dean then crawled under the covers pretending to sleep.

Dean ate the slice halfheartedly in hopes Sam would eat something but it didn't work. He slipped under the covers and spooned against Sam stroking his hair, "Sam I know you're not sleeping…come on talk to me."

Sam turned and rolled into him, "Nothing to talk about …nothing unless you can bring dad back." Sam started crying again and this time Dean cried along with him.

…..

The next day they moved like zombies around the hot, little apartment doing only what needed to be done. Sam spent most of the time on the fold out bed staring at the TV and Dean made calls trying to find if John's body was recovered and what exactly happened.

Dean crawled next to Sam holding him again despite the heat needing the comfort from his brother. Sam closed his eyes and pressed his face against the strong chest listening to the steady heartbeat, "Dean what do we do now?"

"The place is paid up for the month, we got two weeks left before this card expires and I say we hit the ATM and take out the daily limit every single day until we get caught, it expires or they freeze it."

…

They took a bus across town and found an ATM planning on working their way back to the apartment hitting a different machine every day so Dean wouldn't be on camera at the same one each time.

Dean stuck in the card and put in the limit of five hundred then watched the money come out. He grabbed the card, shoved the money in his pocket and they quickly left.

When they got on the bus Sam let out a sigh of relief, "We're going to be ok Dean…if we do this we can live then." Dean put his arm around Sam and kissed his head, "Sure Sam we are going to be just fine. Dad would want us to keep going you know that right? I'll hunt, work…whatever I gotta do and you go to school and it will all work out."

Sam's body started to shake and Dean knew he was crying again, "I know Sam I miss dad as much as you but I'm strong, so are you that's how he raised us right?"

Sam's voice was so quiet Dean hardly heard his answer, "Right Dean."

….

Monday came and Dean tried to act like it was a normal school day, they had two more weeks and he was determined Sam was going to finish the year. He forced Sam out of bed and dressed him then made him a PBJ, Dean rode the bus with him and watched as Sam went in.

Afterward Dean hit an ATM getting another five hundred and now they had enough for another month rent and groceries buying Dean some time to think.

He waited outside of Sam's school all day falling asleep under a tree for a few hours and when it finally let out Dean was right there waiting. Sam ran to him hugging so hard that Dean almost toppled over.

They went back and Dean made some mac and cheese from a mix he bought even adding the milk and butter for Sam. They ate and watched a rerun of a comedy they both liked and Sam almost laughed then stopped himself.

Dean messed up his hair and gave Sam a smile, "Hey laughing wont make you a bad guy Sam." Sam shrugged, "I feel like a jerk laughing, dad is dead."

Dean got up and headed for the door, "Sam I'm just going to step out for a sec, be right back." Dean closed the door behind him and bolted for the laundry room, thankfully it was empty so he could cry. He was going to punch something then stopped himself worried he'd break something and they couldn't go to a doctor.

In the end he punched a bag of laundry until he was exhausted then fell asleep on the table again until Sam came to get him.

He followed him up and Sam made him brush his teeth and go to bed. Sam stopped himself from crying and instead he held Dean for a change then kissed him on the lips, Dean half heartedly said, "Weird Sam."

Sam fingered the worn material of his brothers t shirt, "Dean don't ever leave me…I mean it I can't lose you."

"Sammy don't worry I'm not going anywhere, you don't leave me either because I can't live without you." This time Dean kissed Sam and they managed to fall asleep after that.

A single, terrible event started a life of codependent love that would build into something the world could never understand.

The road to hell is paved with good intentions. Dean had the very best of intentions as he put on the blinders with a singular vision of caring for Sam but if you can't care for yourself trying to do it for someone else becomes the hardest thing to accomplish.

Sam didn't know it that night but someday he would have to be the hero for his brother.

TBC


	3. Dick Roman

Dean tried to make that month pass quickly for Sam, keeping him in school and finishing up the year. He thought of things to do on the weekends that didn't cost money but Sam would find entertaining, trying to get his baby brother to be engaged in anything was proving to be a task even difficult for Dean.

At night after Sam went to sleep Dean would go down the laundry room and work out his frustrations alone. The weight of the situation was breaking him as he sat and tried to keep lists.

Lists of places to go, ways to make money, to keep Sam with him and trying to find someone that would truly help. Dean thought this person didn't exist in the world, one would be willing to take them both on.

John kept them on the road too much never creating bonds with people the brothers could trust and now it was a detriment the nomadic lifestyle they had lead through the years.

….

The first of June came and Dean knocked on the landlords door with an envelope of cash for the rent, the surly man opened the door and grunted, "What?"

"I got the rent for 17B but I need a receipt for my dad."

He scribbled out a receipt and counted the money and when he was going to close the door Dean stopped him, "Next month might be a little late…is that ok?"

"Look kid this isn't a fucking charity, tell your old man its due on the first case closed."

Dean chewed his nail and never noticed it bleeding, the landlord gave him a worried look, "Kid…kid did you hear me?" He watched the blood seep down Dean's finger.

Dean tasted the copper and stopped, "Yeah I'll tell him."

….

He spread the money out on the bed and counted it making more lists, Sam watched him nervously afraid to ask questions.

"Ok we have five hundred thirty left…next month rent will kill us, I tried to buy some time but he wont budge. We pay rent and have like one thirty five left for groceries and bus fare."

"Can I get a job Dean?"

"Sam your ten who the hell is going to hire you to do anything?"

Dean was sorry for the harsh tone as soon as he saw his brothers face, "I'm sorry Sammy I didn't mean to snap at you. I'm fourteen and I can get a job doing something right?"

"Dean isn't there anyone that can help us?"

"You want to be separated from me Sam?"

Sam started crying again, "No Dean never!"

Dean stacked the bills back up, slipped them in the notebook and put it under the mattress, "Alright then just let me figure something out."

….

Dean stood at the counter of the convenience store that night with groceries on the counter, the clerk ran the card then handed it back, "Sorry its declined." Dean stood there biting his bottom lip, "Try it again."

"No it's declined so put the stuff back."

Dean grabbed the milk and cereal, turned and ran right into a man standing behind him. The milk carton fell and started leaking around the man's expensive looking shoes, "Crap…oh man I'm sorry mister!"

Dean bent down to grab the carton and the clerk yelled, "You're going to pay for that!" The man pulled Dean to his feet and grabbed his face, "Go shopping, pick out some groceries this guy can shut his hole and mop up this milk in the meantime."

Dean jerked away, "Thanks but I don't need any charity I can pay for stuff myself."

"Are you sure about that? Don't look a gift horse in the mouth tough guy now go pick out some groceries."

Dean eyed him warily but grabbed a shopping basket and started looking around, the man followed him watching his selections, "My name is Richard but you can call me Dick."

Dean snickered, "Ok …Dick, I guess you should know what your charity cases name is right? I'm Dean."

Dick tapped his expensive watch, "Tick tock Dean I don't have all night." Dean grabbed more milk, cans of soup, boxed mac and cheese, cereal, bread and butter. Dick grabbed a bag of apples and they went back to the counter.

"I had gas on four and ring up the groceries pissant." The clerk glared at the man and Dick leaned over the counter, "Look at me like that again and you're going to be in a world of hurt." He straightened up and smiled at Dean who smiled back.

Dean watched Dick and thought that this was a man who didn't let other people walk all over him. He was immediately attracted to the power the man gave off and in a way felt stronger himself just standing next to him.

Dean grabbed the bags and walked out with his new acquaintance, "Hey thanks for the groceries, I can pay you back when I get a job so don't worry."

Dick opened up the passenger door to his black BMW, "Do I look like I have to worry about a bag of groceries? Now get your ass in the car and I'll drive you home…you do have a home right Dean?"

Dean peered into the car and looked at his dirty sneakers, "Yeah…look I don't want to get your ride all dirty, I can walk."

"You want to pay me back? Let me drive you home then Dean." Dean got in and sat there hugging the bag of groceries. Dick got in and squeezed Dean's knee, "Ready for the ride of your life?"

Dean frowned staring at the hand on his knee, "What do you mean?"

"A ride home…are you always this uptight?"

Dean relaxed, "Oh right that's what you meant."

…

Dick dropped Dean off after giving him his card with his personal number on the back.

Dean ran up the stairs with the groceries and yelled for Sam to open up, he dropped everything on the table and Sam excitedly started unpacking, "How did you get all of this?"

Dean suddenly felt guilty, " They had stuff on sale and…stop asking so many questions!"

Sam started boiling water for the mac and cheese, he actually started humming to himself and it was the first time Dean had heard that coming from his brother in over a month. He thought it was the prettiest sound in the world.

….

That night they were both showered, fed and felt content for once. It was a good feeling the brothers hadn't had in awhile, they left the Spanish channel on. They started to enjoy the noise in the background each night.

Sam pressed against his brother wrapping his arms and legs around Dean tightly, it had become a routine. A way to be so close that he would know any movement his brother made.

Too many nights had passed where Dean was gone and Sam would find him in the laundry room crying, hitting something or sleeping. This way Dean could never go without Sam waking up.

Dean got used to it and let Sam embrace him. He found it comforting himself and it stopped his obsession with escaping into the bowels of the old building to be alone.

Sam gave him a kiss and buried his face in Dean's shoulder, "Goodnight Dean I love you."

"Love you too Sammy."

….

Dick Roman from all appearances seemed a complicated man, people viewed him with fear and he fed off it like a drug.

He pumped his own gas, drove his own car and never forgot where he came from because that hunger to succeed from meager beginnings was the thing that kept him going every day. When he looked at others with silver spoons firmly implanted Dick felt nothing but hatred and disdain for them.

On the flipside of that coin were the poor or middle class, they didn't try hard enough and for that they earned his disgust. He never needed friends and spent any free time amassing pretty things.

When Dick Roman saw Dean Winchester that night he saw a pretty thing, a project, someone to control and a thing to own. He could tell the teenager wasn't hungry enough yet, desperate enough to give himself willingly but Dick Roman was a patient man. It was one of his rare good qualities depending on who you asked.

Yes he seemed complicated but really was quite basic, a predator, bully, someone with an emptiness that needed to be filled constantly and he thought perhaps Dean could fill that void until he tired of him.

TBC


	4. Castiel

July first Dean slipped the money into an envelope and went down to the landlord; he knocked on the door and held it out, "I need a receipt for my dad." The man grunted incoherently, shuffled away and shuffled back a few minutes later with the receipt. "I'm glad you weren't late, I'd hate to have to throw you out."

Dean nodded, "So would I."

He trudged back to the apartment knowing they were down to seventy five dollars now. He bought them another month with a roof over their heads and Dean fished a newspaper out of the garbage and started looking for a job. It was futile, there was nothing for him but he tried anyway canvassing local places for anything, dishwashing, cooking, cleaning telling them he was willing to work hard but in the end he'd go back to the oppressively hot little apartment and sit in front of the fan thinking.

Sam became the upbeat one realizing his brother was losing his edge, life was taking its toll on Dean and Sam was determined not to leave the apartment joyless so he teased Dean on a daily basis.

Today was no exception, he sat on the bed next to him watching Dean make one of his lists and slipped an ice cube out of his glass, Sam dropped it down the back of Dean's shirt and made him jump.

Dean shook it out the bottom while Sam laughed at him, "Wow you should have seen your face!" Dean cracked a smile, "You are so going to get it Sam I swear to god!" Sam squealed as Dean jumped on the bed and when his clamped onto Sam's ankle he got the entire glass of water over his head for his troubles.

Sam bolted as his brother chased him around the room until they both flopped onto the bed exhausted and sweaty. "Dean maybe we can go to the pool today, there's a public pool and it's on the bus route…please can we go?"

"Sure I suppose we can."

….

When they got there the pool was packed and Dean watched the mass of people and felt panicked, he wanted to leave as soon as he got there but Sam was already slipping off his shoes and heading for the water, "Come on Dean I think we'll fit!" Dean followed him and they managed to shoehorn themselves into the pool, Sam made the best out of the situation and Dean kept a careful eye on him as he splashed around laughing.

After an hour Dean had enough and grabbed his brother, "Come on Sam lets go home."

"Dean we just got here come on please?"

"Sam I have to get out of here!"

….

They sat on the bus heading back home, Dean was staring out the window and Sam was staring at Dean, "What's wrong with you Dean? It's like you were scared to be there or something and you're not scared of anything."

"Shut up Sam I'm not scared ok? I just had to get out…too many people I can't take it."

When they got back the brothers hung out in the laundry room where it was cooler until evening then went back to the apartment. There was a new tenant moving in down the hall from them and Sam watched the man curiously, "Should we go say hello to him Dean?"

"I don't know Sam its best to keep our situation private."

Sam was already to the stranger before Dean could stop him, Sam stuck out his hand, "Hi I'm Sam."

The man set down the box of books he was carrying and frowned, "Do you need something Sam?"

"No I was just curious, you're new and I was saying hi because we live down there." Dean grabbed Sam by the shoulders and smiled at the man, "Sorry ….little brother and anyway we didn't mean to bother you."

The man smiled back at Dean softly, "No bother I just didn't think people were that friendly here, my name is Cas and you are…"

"Dean, here let me help." Dean grabbed the box of books and walked into the tiny apartment. "Thank you Dean just set them on the table by the window." Dean and Sam were going to leave and Cas stopped them, "Wait…you eat food?"

Dean started laughing, "Yeah we eat food why?"

Cas seemed a bit flustered, "Sorry that came out wrong, I mean would you like to come for supper the two of you…tomorrow around seven? Unless your parents…"

Dean smiled and ushered Sam to the door, "Great tomorrow at seven see you then."

…

The next night the brothers stood outside the door and before Dean could knock the door opened, Cas waved them inside and pointed to the couch, "Have a seat its almost ready."

Dean got a chance to look the man over closely as he moved around the kitchenette. Cas was wearing beat up jeans and a t shirt, his feet were bare and he wore and apron which Dean found amusing.

He was younger, Dean guessed late twenties or early thirties, he was handsome, not a big man but a good body, pretty blue eyes and messy dark hair. As he talked to them Dean heard less of the words and more of the deep soothing tone.

Cas had a voice that was relaxing and smooth and before Dean knew it he dozed off on the couch, Sam poked him in the side and whispered, "Geez rude much? Supper is ready." Dean opened his eyes and focused on Cas sitting at the little table smiling, they sat and dug into the casserole gratefully. The brothers had lived on quick and cheap food for a long time so anything with effort put into it was a treat for them.

Sam reached for seconds and hesitated, "Go ahead Sam I know I wont eat all the leftovers. So you boys live with your dad you said?" Sam looked at Dean who nodded.

"Is he working?"

"Yeah he works all the time, anyway where do you work?"

He rolled his blue eyes toward the ceiling, "Oh here and there, I go where I'm needed." Dean raised an eyebrow, "Wow nothing vague about that Cas."

"I'm about as vague as you are Dean."

After supper they sat out in the tiny fire escape and had ice cream with Cas, Sam fell asleep with the sticky spoon on his chest while Dean and Cas talked falling into an easy flow with each other.

Dean felt comfortable with him, the man was soft spoken with an innocence Dean didn't even possess. The goodness rolled off him in waves and his voice made Dean feel warm inside in a way he never felt before. Finally Dean carried Sam back and put him to bed, he peered back out the door to the man's apartment and felt an urge to go knock but went back inside.

….

August first rolled around and Dean was truly stuck and he knew it. No rent and ten dollars left. Cas had been kind enough to invite them for supper several times a week and Dean thought the man was as lonely as Dean was hungry.

When a week went by the landlord came to see them demanding the rent from John, Dean told him dad was on a job and would have the money as soon as he got back.

Dean watched him leave and was relieved he bought them a week.

That night Dean slipped down to the basement and called Dick Roman on the burner phone he purchased when they still had money, Dick answered surprisingly chipper and pleased to hear from Dean even though it was eleven in the evening.

"Dean what's up you sound stressed?"

"Dick I was wondering…could I borrow some money from you?"

"Dean I'm not in the habit of giving out loans but you can earn some if you like."

"You would give me a job? That would great I'd rather work for it anyway, I'm a hard worker."

"I'm sure you are, I'll pick you up tomorrow after a business lunch I have. I'll tell Kathy to block me off for the afternoon so I can show you my house."

Dean remembered Sam, "Could my little brother come?"

"How old is he?"

"Ten."

"Too young for the work I want you to do, he stays home you got it?"

"Ok."

….

The next day Dean sat from noon on staring out the window and when he saw the BMW pull up Sam looked over his shoulder, "Dean is that the guy that's giving you a job?"

"Yeah nice care right? Look Sam I'm not sure when I'll get back so just stay in the apartment or go see Cas."

"Sure Dean."

Sam watched as the man got out of the car and held the door open for Dean, Sam thought he looked handsome but there was something about the man that sent a shiver through him, something not quite right.

…

Sam knocked on the door and Cas answered, "What can I do for you Sam?"

Sam walked right in and sat on the couch, "Dean got a job and I'm bored, what are you doing?" Before Cas could answer Sam was grabbing books off the coffee table and flipping through them, "What's all this stuff?"

"Research…I'm a cryptozoologist , I search for unknown species and let me tell you Sam I found some things that you wouldn't believe."

Sam flipped through the sketch book, "I know some of these…shifter…succubus…um…oh that's a mermaid but they aren't like the ones in the movies." Cas took the notebook away and looked at the boy curiously, "What is it your father does for a living?"

"Hunter."

"Oh I see. Sam where is Dean exactly?"

Sam picked at a hole in his jeans, he wasn't sure if he should tell but then he remembered how creepy the man was, "He got a job for a guy called Dick Roman."

Cas had heard the name before, "What is he doing for him exactly?"

Sam shrugged, "I don't know but he took him to his house."

TBC


	5. First Step To Nowhere

**(I'll be off the grid for a week in the wilderness so enjoy the chapter and more to come when I get back. Enjoy)**

Dean watched the city fly past them and everything became greener, clean and manicured, the BMW climbed up a long driveway and pulled up to a gate where a man waved to Dick as they slowing opened up.

Dean was blown away, he never experienced anything like this before and as they pulled in front of the mansion another man held the door for Dean, he got out and thanked him.

Dick ran his fingers down the back of the teenagers neck and whispered, "Not bad right Dean?"

Dean walked inside still dumbstruck, the foyer was massive, bigger than the top floor of the building they lived in. He followed Dick into a living room that was lined with French doors and when they stepped out onto the long marble walkway there was a view of the ocean.

"It's incredible like a movie or something!"

"I don't get much time to enjoy it, I hope you appreciate the work I left to bring you here."

Dean looked at his watch then back to Dick, "I have to get back to make supper for Sam in a couple hours…is that ok?"

"Of course, do you want to explore in the meantime Dean?"

Dean licked his lips nervously and wasn't sure why he was there, "So what do I do…what do you need me for, my job?"

He pulled Dean down next to him on the double chaise and loosened his tie, "Dean how do you feel about me, do you find me attractive?"

"Sure…yeah you're handsome."

He ran his fingers over the angle of Deans cheekbone then the full lips, but when he went in to kiss him Dean pulled back, "Whoa wait a minute what are you doing?"

Dick kissed a trail up his neck to the shell of his ear and whispered, "You need money and I'm lonely…I won't force you I can bring you home if you want me to Dean."

Dean thought of Sam, of the rent that was due in a week and the empty cupboards. He thought of school clothes and books, the fact that Sam sat in that hot box day in and day out because he couldn't provide any level of comfort or fun for him.

"I've never done anything with anyone, I've kissed and that's it so I don't know what you expect from me because I don't know how this works…this guy thing."

"Dean all I want to do today is kiss you, I am a very patient man and if I have to wait for something then it makes it all the more desirable to me so can we agree to kiss for Augusts rent and grocery money?"

Dean gathered up his courage and pressed a hard kiss on Dick Romans mouth trying to act excited about it but Dick started laughing, "Put on the breaks lover who taught you how to kiss?" Dean was mortified, girls always said he was a great kisser and now this man was teasing him.

He got up and angrily headed for the door but felt his wrist caught and Dean was pulled on top of the man, he held him around the waist and stared up into the startled green eyes, "Cool your temper I was teasing I thought your kiss was sweet now let me show you how it's done."

Dick nipped and teased the plump lips then sucked gently pushing his tongue inside as Dean tangled his in the mix, they worked together for a long time until youth and hormones got the best of the teenager and he pushed against the older man's crotch letting out a muffled moan.

Dick stopped the kiss and pushed Dean off him, "Time to go home you earned your money." He lead the bewildered boy back to his BMW and drove Dean home in silence, when he pulled up in front of Dean's building he handed him a thousand dollars cash.

Dean stared down at it shocked at the amount then impulsively hugged him but was pushed way, "I'm not much of a hugger unless I initiate it Dean. I thought you earned that so go pay your rent, get some food and for fucks sake get some new clothes you look like shit and I can't be seen with a kid that looks homeless."

Dean got out and watched the BMW drive away, the experience was surreal like a dream mixed with a nightmare.

He looked up at their window and the room was dark, Dean ran quickly up the stairs and unlocked the door but there was no Sam. He went to the neighbor and pounded on the door, Cas answered sleepily, "Dean what is it, are you looking for Sam?" He pointed to the couch, Sam was curled up in a ball hugging a pillow and there was a half eaten plate of food on the coffee table.

Dean sat next to him smoothing Sam's damp hair, "Thank you for watching him." Cas noticed the haunted look in Deans green eyes, "Are you ok Dean, this job you have…what do you do exactly for Dick Roman?"

Dean shook Sam awake and pulled him up, "Stuff, look I got to get him to the room."

"Dean when you get Sam to bed do you want to come over for something to eat?"

"Sure give me a half hour." Dean led a sleepy Sam back to the apartment and put him to bed.

….

They sat together on the couch discussing the research Cas was doing, Sam's interest in it and then the conversation rolled around to John. "Dean where is your father, Sam said he was a hunter but I've never seen him."

Dean just came out with it, "Dad is dead, if you tell anyone Sam and I will get separated and I can't have that. If you squeal on us I'll run with Sam and it will be all your fault."

Cas sat there processing the information and deciding what to say next, Dean took the silence as nothing but trouble, "See I knew Sam never should have introduced himself to you."

"Dean I won't tell anyone that's your business but is there someone you can contact, someone that will take you both in?"

"No but I'm handling it, I have a job now." Cas noticed Dean avert his eyes, "What do you do for him Dean?"

Dean leaned back and covered his face, "I made out with him for rent and food money, clothes…whatever we needed."

Cas was quiet, Dean took it as a judgment, "Look just never mind Cas I don't need anyone thinking I'm shit, I feel like it as it is."

"Dean I'm not judging you I swear, I'm scared for you."

Dean surprised him when he started to cry quietly, Cas reached out with a tentative hand and stroked his hair, "It's ok Dean you don't have to do anything you don't want to do, can I help you?"

Dean kissed him, desperately wanting someone to take care of him just once in his life and Cas seemed to truly care. The man grabbed his shoulders and pushed him back, "Dean you don't have to do anything for me."

Dean wanted someone to be gentle with him, he had urges and feelings that needed to be explored and Cas seemed like a perfect teacher, "Don't push me away please…I need this I don't know what to do and I don't think you would hurt me."

Cas felt his face flush with embarrassment, "I know about as much as you then Dean."

Cas stood him up and hugged him, "You should go to bed now Dean, anything we did would be because you were desperate and I was feeling lonely. I won't lie, I find you attractive but it's not right."

"Fine then just forget it!" Dean stormed out of his apartment slamming the door behind him.

Castiel sat there confused and frustrated, the teenager had awakened things in himself he didn't fully understand and never expected.

….

Dean paid the rent, filled the fridge and cupboards with food then took Sam school shopping. He bought new clothes for them both, supplies and then let Sam go a hundred dollars worth of crazy in the story. When they were done paying for everything Dean had eighty dollars left so he recharged the minutes on the phone.

It was a joyous moment to watch Sam model his new clothes for Dean, school was starting again and Dean saved what was left for lunches and bus fare.

Sam had to get Cas and made him come over to see all the new things Dean bought him with the money from his new job. Cas tried to engage Dean in conversation but Dean wouldn't say much. He was still upset about the rejection and the fact that Sam was bragging about money Dean earned from making out with Dick Roman.

Even if Sam didn't realize what it was from Dean still felt dirty.

…

Sam and Dean went to school every day, they craved the normalcy and social interaction. Cas enrolled them both under the guise of John Winchester as a favor to them both. The last thing he wanted was to see them go without an education.

…

(September First)

Dean's hand shook as he dialed the number, "Dick its Dean I need to make some money, rent, food…you know."

Dick Roman was driving his yellow Stingray convertible, he was talking to Dean, driving with one hand and had the other between the legs of a young, hot stud fondling his cock as the pretty thing pushed into his tight grip.

"Great Dean I'll be there tomorrow, its Saturday so I'll pick you up in the morning."

"What do I have to do?"

"Never mind I'll see you tomorrow morning at nine sharp."

Dick Roman let go, pulled into a gas station and took out some cash handing it to the lay, "Zip up, get out, I have someone better lined up…my new project."

The pretty thing stammered, "B..but we always…on Friday we…" Dick pushed his sunglasses up and stared at the lay, "Bitch get out now, I said I have someone better."

He watched the boy stumble out of the car, stuff the money in his pocket and run, Dick yelled, "You better run, I eat little boys like you for breakfast." He burst out laughing and pulled back on the road, _"Dean my green eyed baby you're a filthy whore and you don't even know it yet."_

Dick Roman loved a good project and Dean Winchester could last him for years.

….

Dean showered and put on new clothes; he stood outside this time and waited as Sam watched from the window. When Dick got out and opened the door he kissed Dean on the mouth.

Sam watched and felt tears well up in his eyes. Dean never told him he did that with the man. Dean looked up after and knew Sam saw the kiss, he ducked his head in the car and slammed the door, "Why did you have to kiss me in front of Sammy?"

"So what Dean I'll do whatever the fuck I want got that? If I want to kiss you well that's a small price for what I'll give you."

….

They drove to the mansion and this time Dick brought Dean straight to the bedroom, "Take off my clothes Dean."

Dean hesitated until Dick sat on the bed and snapped his fingers, "Get going, my time is important."

Dean's fingers seem to be clumsier than he ever remembered as he took off his benefactor's shoes and socks, "Now my pants Dean…then I want you to touch my cock."

Dean went to his knees and opened the man's fly, he wasn't wearing underwear and when Dean took the pants off he was faced with an erection already weeping and ready for attention. "Go on touch it then lick the head."

Dean wet his lips and gave the slit a lick, he rolled his eyes up and instead of Dick looking grateful he stared down at him with a dark intensity, "Again and then suck it for awhile…I'll tell you when to stop Dean."

Dean licked again and then took part of it in his mouth sucking until he accidently caught his teeth on the delicate skin, he heard the man take in a sharp breath and let out a growl.

Dean never saw the hand coming as it propel him backwards. Dean tasted blood and crawled a few feet then got up, "You son of bitch don't you ever hit me!"

Dick stripped off the rest of his clothing and fell back on the bed laughing at him, "You are a clueless little bitch aren't you? Try again and don't use your teeth."

Dick grabbed his wallet and put cash on the nightstand, "Do you know how many times you would need to get pounded right up the ass for that? At least five…I think a blow job is a small thing to do Dean now get me off."

Dean got him there somehow slowly and awkwardly afraid to piss Dick off again, Dean started to gag as the man forced himself down Dean's throat.

Dick felt the throat tighten and flutter around his cock sending him over the edge as he spilled down the boy's gullet groaning and shuddering and when he was spent Dick Roman grabbed him by the hair and pulled him off.

Dean tried to catch his breath as a long string of fluid dripped onto the expensive carpet; he coughed and struggled to his feet wiping his mouth.

"Time to go Dean…really not bad for a first time blow job, it was your first one right?"

Dean looked at the stain on the carpet and mumbled, "Yeah…it's all a first."

Dick smiled at him wickedly, "Well then I guess I'm pretty fucking special."

Dean thought the man looked like a well fed shark and wondered what it was like thriving off the misery of others.

…

Afterward Dick drove Dean home and Sam watched his brother get out of the car with his head down, shoulders slumped.

Sam jumped on the bed grabbing a comic so Dean wouldn't know he saw him, he opened the door and went straight to the bathroom. Sam heard him vomit then brush his teeth and gargle. Dean lay down next to him and Sam tried to kiss him hello but Dean turned his head away, "Don't kiss me Sammy."

Sam spooned against him, "Please Dean tell me what happened, you hurt your lip."

"Did you do your homework?"

"Yeah, Cas helped me. He's really smart Dean, he's a nice guy."

Dean turned his body toward Sam and ran his fingers over the soft features, "I love you Sam…you know whatever I do is for you right?"

Sam kissed him and Dean let him, "Dean do stuff for you too not just me and don't do anything bad. I saw that guy kiss you…do you have to work and kiss him to get money? I don't think you should have to do that, kissing is for people you love."

Sam planted kisses over his face and then his mouth, "I love you Dean, promise you won't kiss him anymore?"

"Sure Sam I won't kiss him I promise, want to have some supper now?"

Sam got up and took a plate out of the fridge, "Cas made me supper and he made a plate for you too Dean I'll heat it up. He made chicken and mashed potatoes."

Dean smiled watching Sam pour him milk and set the table, Sam talked a mile a minute and then took a breath, "You should say thank you to him Dean."

"Sure Sam I'll do that."

TBC


	6. Fresh Meat

Dean knocked on the door and waited, Cas yelled, "Be there in a sec."

Cas answered in a towel, "Oh Dean come in just give me a moment." He went in the bathroom and Dean sat on the couch waiting, "Dean go ahead and get something to eat if you want, are you hungry?"

"No Sammy gave me that plate you made me thanks," his stomach rumbled, "actually do you have any chicken left?"

"Sure sweetheart go ahead and have some."

Dean smiled to himself, no one ever called him that and it felt nice. Dean got out the plate of chicken and started eating; he was hitting a growth spurt and it seemed he couldn't get enough food. "Hey you're a good cook Cas."

Cas stuck his head out and laughed, "You don't have people cook for you very much do you? Otherwise you could tell what my cooking truly tastes like."

Dean put the plate back in the fidge and polished off a chicken leg, "It tastes good to me." He flopped on the couch and started looking through the stacks of books. He picked up Castiel's notebook filled with sketches and notes, it almost rivaled the one John had left them.

It was filled with different levels of demons, monsters and spirits, strange animals that Dean could have never imagined and he wondered what exactly the man did for a living then wondered if he was a man at all. There was another book that seemed to be the man's grimoire filled with spells in languages that Dean could read fluently and many others he didn't recognize

Cas came out in a robe and sat next to him and Dean quickly closed the book then put it back. Cas frowned and gently touched the cut on Deans swollen lip, "What happened here?" Dean looked away, "I fell down, no big deal."

"Did he hit you?"

"Who?"

"Dick Roman that's who…Sam told me about him. Sam doesn't like him Dean and I know he did this, why?"

"I didn't do something right, I hurt him by accident…I didn't mean to do it, then he hurt me so we're even."

Cas squeezed his hand and then let go, "He had no right to do this, no one should ever strike you Dean."

"It's not a big deal, I can take care of myself."

"If you say so Dean but I'm here to help."

Dean tried kissing his lips, every time the man treated him gently Dean wanted to feel Cas in some way so the goodness would rub off on him somehow and that heaviness would vanish from his heart.

Cas turned his face away and closed his eyes causing Deans temper to flare, "What's wrong Cas I'm not good enough to kiss?"

Cas got up and went to the door, "I have to do some research for work…please don't be angry with me Dean, we didn't talk after the last time and it was difficult because I care about you. I just don't want you to think that the only reason I am your friend is because I want something."

Dean walked past him then stopped, "Thanks Cas, but I still wanted to kiss you though."

"I know…me too. Goodnight Dean."

…

Dean went back to the apartment and got into bed with Sam, "Dean did you tell him thanks?"

"Yeah Sammy I did."

Sam stretched out on top of Dean like a little kitten trying to stay warm, the night was cold even for September and the old radiator did little to heat the entire room. Dean pulled the blanket over their heads and Sam started giggling, "What's so funny?"

"It's like our own world under here." Sam kissed him on the mouth and lingered. Dean shoved him off and sat up, "I guess in your world people don't brush their teeth," Dean pointed to the bathroom, "gross Sam go brush them! You smell like you have chicken stuck in your teeth."

Sam got up and ran to the bathroom; Dean heard the water running and he yelled, "I'm still not kissing you Sam…floss while you're at it!"

Sam came out a few minutes later, jumped on the bed and licked Dean up the side of the head then fell over laughing. Dean made a face and rubbed off the spit, "Holy crap what is wrong with you tonight Sam!?"

He shoved Dean with his foot, "Nothing I'm just teasing you is all." He settled back on top of Dean, "I'm cold is this is ok?"

"You just don't want me going to the laundry room."

"Dean its weird…it's like a creepy white prison that stinks like bleach and mold down there, I know why you go there, you go to cry and hit things."

"So what, Sam I have to let off steam or I'll go crazy. Right now we should be traveling with dad. I should be saving people and helping him…you should be training so you can protect yourself."

Sam mumbled before falling asleep, "You can teach me Dean, you're the best." He started snoring softy and Dean reached over and shut off the lamp, _"Yeah sure Sam…if I'm the best that's not saying much."_

…..

Mid September Sam was sitting at the table picking at his food, Dean made Spam and Ramen noodles one of Sam's favorites, "What's wrong with it?"

"My tooth hurts and even soft stuff makes it bad now." Dean got up and looked inside Sam's mouth and a bottom molar looked cracked and the gum was red and infected. "Fuck, man it looks bad like we can't ignore it bad." Dean started pacing trying to figure out what to do.

"I'm sorry Dean I fell during gym and I didn't think it was bad."

"Stay here Sam."

Dean went down the hall and knocked on the door, Cas opened it and waved him in. "I'm just finishing a paper but have a seat." He closed the laptop and crossed his legs watching Dean, "What's wrong?"

"Sam has a bad tooth and I think I need to get him to a dentist but I need a parent…I was wondering if you could be dad for us, I know you look too young to be our dad but put on your glasses and dress in your nerd clothes, that should do it."

"Yes Dean I would be happy to help, I will try to look as ancient and nerd like as possible."

A smile played around Castiel's lips and Dean realized how he must have sounded, "I mean you look way too young and hot be our dad but …crap I'm sorry."

"Its fine Dean don't worry."

….

Dean sat in the laundry room and stared at the phone, it was almost midnight when he got the courage to dial the number. "Hi it's Dean."

Dick shoved the pretty thing riding his cock off from him, Dean was early this time and he was pleasantly surprised, "Well it's not time for the rent …emergency?"

"Yeah Sam's tooth, I know it's gonna cost and I thought maybe I could get the rent for October and the groceries and the dentist so I'll need more, sorry."

"I'm not the one that's going to be sorry, you are going to owe me a favor, when I want that favor I'll let you know….are we in agreement Dean?"

Dean didn't answer, he didn't know what to say to the man after that. He heard Dick Roman laughing on the other end, "Cat got your tongue Dean? What do you think you're going to have to do?"

Deans mouth went dry, "Your gonna rape me."

"Dean its only rape if you don't give me permission, I can buy guys anytime I want but for you I need you to beg for it and you're not hungry enough for real money yet are you?"

Dean's face flamed with anger, "You're a fucking monster! Who the hell talks like that?"

"Someone that is a monster, thinks you're a beautiful kid and has money to burn, you should be flattered I'm working for it Dean. Fine I wouldn't fuck you anyway…all the suspense would be over."

Dean relaxed, "Ok well I can owe you a favor then."

"I'll pick you up at your school tomorrow, Sam can ride home by himself."

"No way Sammy doesn't ride that city bus on his own ever!"

Dick Roman grabbed the boys head of curls forcing his mouth down to finish the job, "How about this…Sam can get a ride home with me."

The last thing Dean wanted was Sam to actually meet Dick Roman, "Can we do it Saturday? Please its only two days away and his appointment is Monday. I have someone that will keep an eye on him."

"Saturday at eight, I'll take you out for breakfast. Are you sure Sam wouldn't want to come? I have a big house he can play video games or maybe get a riding lesson in while you work."

Dean's voice tightened, "Never."

…

Saturday came and Dean knocked on his neighbor's door, Cas answered and noticed Sam right away, he looked miserable, "Cas I have to get groceries and school stuff for Sam and I need you to watch him, he's got that bad tooth and…"

"Of course, come on Sam." He brought him over to the couch and covered him up, Cas turned on cartoons, "When are you coming back do you think?"

Dean lied, "Not too long it's just groceries and errands, thanks I appreciate it. Be good Sam."

Sam closed his eyes; he was sweating and felt terrible, "I'm too sick to be bad Dean. Come back soon please."

….

Dean ran down the stairs as fast as he could and there was Dick Roman waiting for him, Dean got in and buckled up.

"Your ten minutes late."

"Sorry."

They drove to beautiful outdoor café and Dick ordered for them, he sat drinking coffee watching Dean drink his, "Your clothes are cheap I thought you'd pick out something better than that, do you need more money?"

Dean laughed bitterly, "I always need money, it's all I think about anymore."

Dick gave him that predator's grin, "Did anyone ever tell you how truly perfect you are…physically I mean, whatever goes on in that mind of yours I imagine is quite strange so that is far from perfect."

Dean blushed, "I'm not perfect, I have scars all over, I'm bow legged sort of, I'm not smart like Sam is."

"I think your clever and resourceful, those are good qualities, you're not one of the sheep Dean you're a Sheppard. Given time and resources you could be like me."

Dean sat there staring at his food, "I really don't want to be like you…Dick."

…

After breakfast they went to the mansion where again someone held the door for Dean. Dick grabbed his hand and they walked quickly, moving down long hallways passing room after room until Dick came to a halt. There was a powerfully built man sitting on a chair by the door.

Dick stared down at him with no expression, "Is he ready…clean and prepared? I hate filth."

The man nodded, "Yes Sir just how you like them."

"Excellent."

…..

Cas sat next to Sam watching cartoons and stroking his sweaty hair, "You have a fever Sam, would it be alright if I looked at your tooth?"

Sam mumbled, "Sure." He opened his mouth and made a pained sound, Cas looked inside and when Sam looked at him he swore he saw a light in the man's eyes, "It looks very bad, I have something I can do, hang on."

Cas brought back a little jar, "I have a special salve that will fix your tooth for you." Sam croaked, "Yeah how?"

"Well I have been everywhere you know, places you can't imagine and I learn things. Do you trust me?"

"Sure Cas."

Cas opened the jar and dipped his finger in, "Close your eyes and open your mouth Sam." Sam closed his eyes and opened his mouth; he felt a finger press gently around the tooth and gum. Sam didn't taste anything at all but it felt very warm.

"There all done."

Sam's eyes fluttered open and he sat up smiling, "Wow what was that? My tooth feels good now!" Castiel screwed the top back on the empty jar. "Special magic, now do you feel like lunch?"

Sam was starving, he hardly ate for a week, "Yes, can you make casserole? I like those, it's like a surprise and you're a great cook."

"Of course Sam a casserole it is, do you have homework?"

"Yeah."

"Well go get it and you can use my laptop while I cook alright?"

Sam got up and suddenly turned around hugging him around the waist, "Thank you, not just for my tooth, for being a nice guy."

The angel hesitated and then patted him on the head, "Yes…well run and get your homework."

He watched the little boy dash out the door, Castiel sat down and was feeling confused again, Sam ran back in, slammed the door and dropped his back pack on the table spilling coffee all over and the angel lost his train of thought.

…

They entered the huge room with a four poster bed as the focal point, Dean could see a figure on the bed and felt hands shoving him toward the person.

"Go on Dean, today I have something fun for you and some good practice. You know nothing about sex…really I thought someone that looked as good as you would have been much better but that blow job was horrible. No wonder you're a virgin in every sense of the word."

Dean turned around and shoved the man back, "Fuck you Roman!"

He laughed and slapped Dean hard, the man was incredibly strong, "I love that fight in you Dean, it makes you so much more desirable to me."

Dick grabbed Dean by the hair and pulled him along to the bed forcing his head down until Dean was face to face with an especially pretty young man.

He watched Dean through heavy lidded eyes and looked like he was in another world, Dean saw he was naked and had his wrists chained to the iron headboard.

Dick Roman sat next to him and traced fingers down the young man's body, "I thought he would be a nice contrast to you Dean, exotic and pretty, big brown eyes and smooth tan skin...just the sweetest thing in my stable until I met you Dean."

Dick fingered a long, shiny dark lock of hair and licked his lips. He pulled a key from his pocket and unlocked the shackles on the boy's wrists. "You can call him Antonio but I just call him fresh meat because later I'm going to eat him right up."

Antonio's head lolled to the side and he smiled at Dick Roman, "I'll do good for you."

Dick grabbed his face tightly and lashed his long tongue across Antonio's pretty face, "No its Dean you're going to do good for fresh meat…Dean take your clothes off."

TBC


	7. Slow Spiral

Dick pointed to a door, "Go shower Dean, clean yourself up and out. Teenagers are so lax in cleanliness sometimes."

Dean stood up and headed for the bathroom stopping long enough for parting words, "I'm not getting fucked…I'm not fucking him." He went to the bathroom and shut the door locking it behind him and quickly undressed, he entered the huge walk in shower and got the water going then sat for a moment contemplating what to do next.

….

Dick brushed Antonio's hair off his face and watched his eyes, "Are you feeling relaxed enough, Dean is a lot to handle."

His eyes were black and still far off, "I feel so tired."

Dick turned him over on his stomach and rubbed his back, "That's good…that's what I wanted." He traced his tongue down Antonio's cleft and tasted quickly then sat up and waited for Dean.

…

Dean scrubbed himself everywhere and shut the water off gathering courage for the next step. He heard Dick calling for him, Dean stared at his reflection in the mirror and tried to recall the last time he felt happy, "Be right there."

He listened at the door and heard the boy cry out, Dean opened the door a crack and watched as Dick Roman was apparently eating out Antonio, his face was screwed up in discomfort and even though Dean never experienced it he thought someone's tongue anywhere on your body would have to feel good.

He was shocked when Dick slid his tongue out and it seemed long enough to fuck the boy with it. He got up and smacked Antonio on the rear, "If you cry out again I will literally shove my tongue so far inside next time that we can French kiss from opposite ends…do I make myself clear?"

Antonio had his face buried in the pillow and his answer was muffled,"Yes."

Dean closed the door again and for the first time it he felt he was dealing not just with a cruel human but a cruel monster, in Deans experiences most of the time they were equally as dangerous.

He fingered the knife hidden in his jacket and wished John was there like he had a million times since his father died then gathered up his clothing with the jacket on top and exited the bathroom. Dean set them in a pile on a chair and stood there, "What do you want me to do?"

Dick sat on a large, overstuffed couch drinking an amber liquid, "kiss him and take it from there…I'll watch and give you pointers."

Dean stretched out next to Antonio and rubbed his arm awkwardly, "How old are you?"

"Fifteen."

"Look I don't want to hurt you…it's not my thing so tell me if you don't like something. I don't know what the hell I'm doing either so just…"

"Dean shut up and kiss him, do you want a drink to loosen up?"

Dean sat up and wet his lips nervously, "Not what you gave him." Dick held up his glass and Dean got up and took it downing the amber liquid, he coughed and made a face, "Gross what is that?"

"Scotch, it's an acquired taste…want some more?"

Dean felt a warmth pass through him and nodded, "One more." He poured another and handed it to Dean who drank it down and went back, he immediately got on top of Antonio and started kissing him trying to remember what he was supposed to do.

They held each other and pressed hard grinding their bodies together in a heated exchange of youthful passion until Antonio moaned into Dean's mouth and he soon followed, it was over much too quickly for Dick Romans tastes but he applauded as they both shot wet and sticky mingling their orgasms and shuddering at the same time.

"That was great! Excellent Dean good mouth action and body movement…you came too quickly but your both young so it happens. Dean roll off and let him clean you."

Antonio lavished his tongue over the hot, damp skin until Dean was shiny with spit. Dick came over and ran his thumb over the boys mouth cleaning off the excess then stuck it in his mouth, "Both of you go shower and Antonio get something to eat and some clean clothes then go back to the stable."

…..

Dean sat alone in the room clean and dressed with new clothes that were laid out for him, the old ones Dick deemed cheap were in the garbage by the bed.

Dick stepped in and gestured for Dean to follow, "Where are we going?"

"The stables…not the horse stables Dean my special stables."

They took a golf cart along the paved pathway traveling for what seemed a very long way passing through a short stretch of woods and past a waterway ending at a large dormitory style building.

"This is it, my stables Dean where I keep all the pretty things in my revolving collection."

Dean got out and followed Dick inside where there was a large common room with several young males playing video games, eating and drinking beer. None of them looked especially happy to see Dick Roman but they all managed to muster up passable smiles and gathered around their benefactor.

Dick walked into the common room and scowled when he saw the mess, "Junk food…beer? If I want a bunch of fat alcoholics I'll get some but if you want to stay here you all better hit the gym. If I want you to drink you drink otherwise forget it."

He fished a bottle of pills out of his pocket and tossed it on the table, "Take pills if you want a buzz…no beer guts in my stable got it bitches?"

They all answered yes and went to clean up the mess without being told to.

Dick took Dean on a tour, some rooms contained boys ranging from some almost as young as Sam up to he guessed seventeen. He noticed the lack of closeness you would have expected for a group of boys thrown into a situation, they all looked haunted and lost in worlds of their own making to escape the reality of the life they all had with Dick Roman.

"None of them are allowed in the house or anywhere for that matter unless I say so, just last week I let one go at a gas station because he bored me to tears and your phone call was more exciting than giving him a hand job."

Dean felt nauseas from the sex and scotch then the stable tour, "I have to get back to Sam, he's sick and I have a friend taking care of him."

"What friend?"

"Just a guy that lives down the hall."

…..

They pulled up in front of the building and Dick started kissing Dean but he pulled away, "I don't get you, I come over to be with you for money and you make me do things with that boy? What do you get out of it all, its weird…all of it Dick I don't like it."

Dick pulled out a roll of bills and handed it to Dean, "I've done everything Dean, I'm bored and when I'm not working I play. I have a stable of bitches and any man would be happy to own all of them. Anything I want I can have but I'm jaded…look I don't have to explain myself to a child."

Dean got out after the insult and Dick followed him to the door, "No you can't come in, I don't want Sam meeting you."

Dick nuzzled the crook of his neck and whispered, "Dean you hurt my feelings, I wouldn't think of doing anything to hurt that little brother of yours…I bet he doesn't even had grass on the field yet does he?"

Dean instinctively punched him sending the man reeling back down the short flight of stairs, he quickly unlocked the door and slammed it behind him running up the stairs to Castiels apartment.

Dean banged on the door and as soon as it opened he pushed his way in out of breath and eyes darting around like an animal, "Shut the door Cas lock it!"

Sam woke up and rubbed his eyes, "Dean where were you?" Dean forced himself to calm down and sat on the couch, "I was stuck…wrong bus, damn Sammy you ask too many questions!"

Sam pretended to look at a book and ignored his brother so Dean wouldn't notice the hurt on his face.

"I'm sorry Sam, how do you feel?"

Castiel sat on the other side of Sam and smiled, "He is much better, all fixed." Sam brightened up then, "Dean he used some magic salve and fixed me right up, I feel great!"

Dean opened Sam's mouth and checked, it was as if the tooth was never damaged, "How did you fix the crack…what did you do?" Dean stared at Castiel for a moment then grabbed Sam's hand, "What are you?" Dean stood up quickly and reached for his brother, "You know what, never mind what you are."

He grabbed Sam's hand and dragged him to the door, "Dean thank Cas he fixed me!"

"Yeah thanks we gotta go now."

….

Dick got up and brushed himself off, he straightened his neck back then glanced down at his broken watch, _"Dean you little prick…guess you need to find out what happens when you don't play nice with others."_

…..

Dean made them noodles for supper and hopped on the bed next to Sam, they ate and watched a cop show rerun then both brushed their teeth, "You got homework Sam?"

"I left my stuff next door, you dragged me out Dean before I could even get it. You were a fricking jerk to Cas after he fixed me. What about you Dean, I bet you have homework…maybe you should worry about yourself instead of me all the time."

Dean sighed and got up, "Stay here and I'll get your stuff."

He went next door and before he could knock the door opened, "What Dean?"

"Sam left his stuff here."

"Oh…well come in then." Castiel busied himself at the kitchen table with his back to the boy as Dean gathered Sam's books in his backpack, he looked over at the man's back slumped over his computer and felt guilty for treating him so badly.

"Cas?"

"Yes Dean?"

"I'm sorry I acted like that, I don't get how you fixed the tooth and I don't know what you are…that scares me because I've seen too much and stuff that isn't human and usually its something that needs to be killed. Do I need to worry about that?"

"What Dean killing me? No because you can't kill me so there is nothing to worry about."

"Ok well that's good, I like you and I don't want to hurt you. So what are you then?"

"Nothing you need to concern yourself about, where were you today Dean?"

Dean smiled, "Nowhere you need to concern yourself about."

Dean stood there awkwardly for a moment and then he heard the angel laugh softly, "You are complicated Dean Winchester."

Dean dropped the bag and sat at the little table, "Not really, all I want to do is hunt, find out what happened to my dad. When I'm sixteen I'll get my dad's car, take Sammy and leave this place. I don't want my brother to get hurt."

"So you hurt yourself in the process then? Do you ever think that is hurting Sam?"

Dean got up, grabbed the bag and left. He went back handed it to Sam and ran downstairs to sit in the dark awhile.

Dean cried over the thought of hurting Cas, hurting Sam and the consequences of punching Dick Roman. He screamed until he was exhausted and fell asleep on the table, Sam came down later and got Dean then put him to bed.

Sam got in next to him but when he tried to touch him Dean rolled away in his sleep tensing up. Sam went to his own side feeling lonely and lost without his brother.

…..

Monday after school Sam walked out with a couple friends from last period math and one of them pointed across the street, "Wow look at that car!"

There was a Maserati Quattroporte in silver, the window rolled down and Dick Roman was waving, he yelled, "Sam come on over!"

"That's my brother's boss, I gotta go." He ran across the street and stuck his head in the window, "Where's Dean?"

"Hop in Sam, I'm picking him up."

Sam got in and looked around the car, "This car is awesome, I bet it cost a lot." Dick eyed Sam up and down taking in every inch and smiled, "You could say that." He threaded his fingers gently in the back of the long, shaggy waves, "I can tell your going to exceed your brother in good looks someday Sam."

Sam shrugged, "I doubt it, Dean is handsome…can we go get him now?"

Dick Roman flipped his sunglasses back down and smiled broadly, "Sure Sam anything you say."

TBC


	8. Sammy Meets The Monster Dick

Dean waited at the bus stop for Sam and when he was late Dean panicked, the bus came and went and still no Sam. He was about to go look for him when the Maserati pulled in down a stretch and Dean knew immediately who it was. His gut tightened as he hurried across the street and down the block running until he got to the car.

The window went down and Sam was in the passenger seat eating ice cream, he held a cone out to him and Dean took it then stared over at Dick Roman who lifted his sunglasses and smiled.

"Dean you look as if you saw a monster…Sam be an angel and hop in the back, buckle up for safety I wouldn't want that pretty face getting hurt."

Sam crawled over the seats and buckled up, he dripped ice cream on the seat then grabbed a napkin to wipe it up, "Sorry Dick I didn't mean to do that."

"No problem Sam I have men to clean those things up."

Dean dropped the cone on the sidewalk and got in and snapped at his brother, "Sam you always meet me at the bus no matter what you got that?"

"Sorry Dean I thought we were getting a ride, Dick is your boss and I thought it was alright."

Dean looked in the mirror and saw the hurt in his brothers eyes, "It's ok this time Sam just next time meet me there."

Dick slid his hand behind Dean and fingered his skin underneath his shirt, "I was just telling Sam that he can come with you next time you work, I'll have one of my men give him a riding lesson…Dean don't you think Sam would fit right in at the stables? I have lots of men that would love to give your baby brother a really good, long riding lesson."

Dean bit his bottom lip and resisted the urge to punch him again, "No…I don't think so."

Dick wet his lips slowly, "Sam your first lessons will be long and hard, that little ass of yours will be so sore for a long time but I promise it will get easier and easier each time you ride. You're a big boy Sammy…you're not afraid of a little pain are you?"

Sam whined, "Come on Dean I want to see the stables and have lessons I can take it."

Dean closed his eyes and ignored his brothers whining.

Dick pulled out and they drove in the opposite direct of their building, Deans eyes snapped open and he looked around in a panic, "Where are we going?"

"I'm taking you and Sam out for dinner."

Dean knew better than to argue and he didn't want to upset Sam so he settled in for the uncomfortable ride.

…

They ordered and Sam looked around the restaurant in amazement, "This place is too fancy for the way I'm dressed." Sam looked down at the stain on his shirt from lunch and frowned, "I look like a slob…everyone is going to stare at me."

Dick laughed warmly which was creepier to Dean than when he was cold, the man could change like the weather and when he was kind there was always some darker meaning behind it.

Dick ran his hand up Dean's thigh then settled between his legs grasping his crotch tightly, "So Dean I need you to come over this weekend…it's going to be November before you know it and I know your rent is coming."

Castiel fixing Sam's tooth put Dean a month ahead on rent with enough left over for groceries and incidentals buying him time away from Dick Roman.

"No I'm good, I won't have to work until the end of November for Decembers rent."

Dick pointed to the waiter, "Sam run over there and see what's keeping the food." After he got up and left Dick squeezed tighter and twisted Dean's genitals forcing a gasp out of him, tears involuntarily slid down his cheeks.

"Dean stop fucking around, I am not playing with a fourteen year old smart ass like you. Punching me and causing me to fall down stairs put a whole new spin on our relationship."

"You talked about Sam like he was a…like he was like me. You deserved it and don't ever pick him up again I mean it."

"Dean you come this weekend and bring Sam or I swear I will drag his scrawny ass out to the car, bend him over the seat and ram my big …pardon the pun…dick right into that teeny, tiny cherry hole of his until I have to get the blood professionally cleaned from the seats."

Dean let out a sobbing noise and felt frozen in place, every fear he had for Sam seemed to be dripping from Dick Romans lips like poison.

"In fact it's a trip to the emergency room for little Sammy…I'll tear him open like a gift on Christmas morning…make you see what happens when you fuck with me."

Dick released his crotch and smiled warmly again, "Here comes Sam now."

Dean gasped at the sudden rush of pain between his legs.

"He said it would be just a couple minutes." Sam looked at Dean and touched his cheek, "What's wrong?"

Dean mumbled, "Nothing."

Dick draped his arm across the back of Sam's chair and smiled down at him, "Sam would you like to hear what Dean does when he comes to work for me? Oh and then I can tell you about the stables."

Sam looked up at him waiting, excitement in the hazel eyes.

"Dean should I tell him…or have you decided to bring Sam next time? I promise it's just going to be lunch and horseback riding…you and I will have our time without him."

Dean sat there refusing to answer.

Dick rubbed Sam's shoulder, "Sam would you come out to the car with me for awhile?"

Dean wiped his eyes and nodded, "Fine ok you win Sam can come." Sam wanted to tell them how excited he was but Dean looked hurt somehow and he decided to keep it to himself.

….

Sam and Dean watched the lights of the city pass by on their way home, Dick cleared his throat and glanced up at Sam in the mirror, "So Sam you know what your brother does for me?"

Dean hung his head in shame and waited for the hammer to drop, "Dean helps me with my work, I'm a businessman and have a lot of interests. Dean is my inspiration I suppose you could say."

Sam leaned over the seat and whispered, "I'm proud of you Dean."

"Yeah thanks Sam."

…..

Sam went to the top of the stairs and stood by the door, Dick waved goodbye to him, "Bye Sam see you soon…oh and be careful on those stairs you could take a nasty fall."

Dean clenched his fists and when Dick kissed his cheek he pictured pounding him into the pavement until he was dead but instead he said goodbye and followed Sam inside.

….

Sam sat on the bed eating the cake he brought home from the restaurant and eyed Deans pie, "Aren't you going to eat it Dean, you love pie." Dean pushed it over to him and smiled, "You eat it Sammy I'm not hungry."

Sam took his fork and cut a piece then held it out, "Eat it…I know you want it so stop pretending." Dean let Sam feed him until it was gone then Sam poured him a glass of milk and handed it to him, "I'm going to take care of you Dean, you don't eat much or sleep very well anymore. Maybe I can get a job and help out next summer …you know until your sixteen then Cas can help you get your license and we can take dads car and leave here. Maybe dad is alive do you think?"

"No Sam I don't think so sorry, but we are still out of here I promise."

….

That night Sam wrapped himself around Dean as usual like a silent alarm but when Sam fell asleep he slept hard and Dean could easily slid right out of his grasp.

He went down the hall and went to knock then hesitated and instead tried the door, it was unlocked as always which Dean could never figure out why because it wasn't safe.

He went in as quietly as he could and saw the figure on the bed, he slipped off Johns robe and pulled back the covers and got in next to Castiel finding he wasn't asleep. The blue eyes flickered open and focused on Dean, "You should go Dean."

"Do you want me to go…really?"

Castiel didn't say anything and Dean took it as an ok to continue, this time when he kissed the angel kissed him back but Dean had to show him how and he found Cas a quick learner.

He trailed his hand down the lean, strong body until he touched the angel between the legs and stroked him carefully all the while begging him to do the same but the angel kept his hands at his sides afraid to move.

Finally Dean let go and stretched out on top pushing his legs open and rubbing against Castiel like he did with Antonio, he was happy when he felt the angel's arms wrap around him tightly and the warmth of his breath against his neck as the quiet little whimpers and moans became quicker.

Castiel lifted Dean in the air with his hips and cried out holding him up until the his cock stopped jerking and his vessel was spent. When he dropped Dean worked quickly finishing close behind and then clung to the angel just like Sam did to him, desperately.

….

Castiel stared at the crack running across the ceiling and listened to the boy on top of him breathing softly. He gently stroked the sweat soaked hair tracing the fine features with his fingertips and Dean smiled.

"I love you Cas."

"Dean you say that because I give you a feeling of security."

Dean raised his head and spoke with an edge of anger, "Stop telling me why I do and say things, I know why I said it so shut up. I do love you, can't I care about someone?"

"I'd say love is love and your right Dean I shouldn't question it. I love you as well."

Dean relaxed then and closed his eyes, "I love Sam too…I love him like this, it's wrong and I know that but I can't help it. With you it's ok to do this and I can tell you how I feel…with Sam I hide it and push it down. Please don't tell anyone, Cas you're the only person I ever told that to."

Castiel rubbed little circles on his back and spoke softly, "It's a pure love you have for Sam and someday things might change but for now yes I think it would be wrong to act on your feelings."

Dean started kissing him again when a knock came at the door, a small voice came, "Dean…Dean are you here? Sorry Cas I checked the laundry room and Dean wasn't there."

Dean got up quickly and put on the robe then went to sit on the couch, Castiel covered up and pretended to sleep. "Come on in Sammy."

Sam pushed open the door and looked in, "Come back Dean don't wake up Cas…what are you doing in here?"

"Nothing Sam I couldn't sleep."

Dean got up and brought Sam back to their room and got into bed with him, "I promise I won't leave so you go to sleep for me ok?"

"Ok Dean love you."

"Love you too Sammy."

….

Saturday came and it was time to payback the favor Dean owed Dick Roman, he and Sam waited on the front steps and watched as the cherry red GMC Sierra pulled up and the passenger window rolled down, Dick Roman was for once not wearing a business suit.

He waved them toward the truck and Sam climbed in first pressed against Dick and Dean got in next to him. He watched as Dick spread his legs farther open to push against Sam's thigh, "All set for a fun weekend boys?"

TBC


	9. Weakness

Sam sat between them wondering why no one was talking, Dean was grasping his hand tightly like Sam was about to vanish into thin air. Dick Roman was staring straight ahead, his face tight and cold looking but Sam couldn't see his eyes.

"This is a nice truck…I didn't think a guy like you would drive one."

Dick glanced down at Sam and back to the road, "I have a lot of vehicles Sam, I'm not all sports cars and luxury vehicles. Remember Sam you always need the right tool for the job…today it's a truck because I'm driving you out to the stables while Dean works."

Dean squeezed Sam's hand so hard he cried out and pulled away, "Stop it your hurting me Dean!" Dean snapped out of his fugue state and looked at his brother, "Sammy…sorry I wasn't thinking."

Dick smiled to himself, "Dean I have a nice gentle horse for Sam to start on and my stable manager Billy is an experienced rider and trainer, in fact Sam the horse you're going to ride today is called Jezebel and Billy worked with her as a show horse. Jezebel is retired now but honestly Dean there isn't a better one to start on so don't worry ok?"

Dean relaxed, Dick sounded sincere and he thought that it wouldn't be so terrible for Sam to have a lesson.

….

They drove past the estate to another parcel of property with a huge, well maintained stable and barn. Billy was there waiting for them and Sam practically climbed over Dean to get to the door, Dean caught him around the waist.

Dean laughed at his over eager brother, "Whoa Sammy hold on, let me get out first!"

"Come on Dean hurry up I want to go riding!" Dean held him tight on purpose as Sam giggled and struggled, "Let me go, come on please?" Dean hugged him tight and kissed his forehead, he whispered, "Sammy listen…if anything weird happens just run, I'll find you I promise…I love you."

Sam tumbled out of the door and ran over to Billy, "I'm Sam where's my horse?"

Billy laughed at the enthusiastic little boy then stopped when Dick Roman walked over, "Billy take good care of Sam for me, don't let him get hurt."

Billy was a weathered man, long and rangy with a lifetime under his belt and he didn't care much at all for Dick Roman but the man paid well and the job was secure. He eyed him and then the two boys, "Can that one come riding?"

"Who Dean? No he's got a job to do with me."

Billy sighed sadly, "Well he looks like a good kid…are you sure someone else can't help you Mister Roman?"

"Don't be stupid and don't question me, show Sam a nice time and I'll call when Dean is done."

Billy watched Dean hug his brother like it was for the last time, the boy bowed his head and slowly went back to the truck. Billy didn't care for Dick Roman one single bit and at that moment hated him.

…

Dean entered the theater and looked around in amazement that a man could actually have his own theater right in his very own home. Instead of theater seats there were reclining leather love seats facing the screen, four of them facing the screen in a semi circle.

Dean walked up to the candy counter and looked at the big popcorn machine with freshly popped corn inside. There was a full soda fountain with anything a person could want to drink.

The moment was broken when Dick pressed up behind him and long arms circled his waist, "Do you want some Dean? Take anything you want it's all for you."

Dean eyed the popcorn again and then jerked away from the embrace, "I'm good…not hungry, is Sam really ok?"

"He's fine I promise, Sam will be smiling and pink cheeked from the sun at the end of the day."

The lights went down and just the light from the screen cast a glow over the room except for the art deco accent lighting along the walls, Dean sat down and stared at the blank screen, "Are we going to watch a movie?"

"Sure Dean, take off your clothes and go take a shower first. There's a robe on the back of the door." Dean looked over to the bathroom, got up and slowly walked over, Dick watched him slip inside and heard the lock turn.

….

Dean came out and Dick was in a bathrobe having a drink, he handed a beer to Dean and patted the couch, "I know you said you hated Scotch so beer it is."

Dean sat down and drank deeply then wiped his mouth, "So what am I doing?"

"Dean I want to apologize for being so harsh to you the other day…for getting you all worked up over Sam, I wouldn't rape him. You know I enjoy permission because that means someone is to the point where they are willing to do anything and little Sam would never do that because he's a good boy."

Dick let out a sharp laugh, "Not like you Dean…you whore for the highest bidder don't you?"

Dean ignored the insult, "I don't like you talking about him and I hate that Sam is here at all. Dick I'm serious…I will run with him no matter what. I'll live in a fucking box with Sammy if I though you would hurt him, my brother is my life and I'd kill anyone that hurt him."

Dick gave Dean a fresh beer, "I admire that, the bloodlust to protect what belongs to you…damn your special Dean, a guy could fall in love with you."

Dean laughed bitterly, "You don't know what the hell love is so forget that, I could never love you…I fucking hate you, besides I love other people not you."

That peaked Dicks interest, "Really? I know one of them is Sam, it's written all over your face Dean. If Sam was old enough and not your precious baby brother you would hit that sweet little ass until the sun came up…I think we both know Sam is going to be one big, hot piece."

"Shut up!"

"Oh but you love him, there would be flowery words and undying devotion given…Sam would be your everything and no matter how many girls you screwed that pretty face and tight body would be burned into your brain forever. Every time Sam spoke his voice would melt your heart and his touch would send you to the stars. You are in love with him but you just won't admit it yet will you?"

Dean gripped the bottle tightly infuriated that everything the man said was true, that Sam was inside of him keeping Dean going. Everything was for Sam and Dean was spoiled for anyone else. The level of protection and devotion was beyond reproach and Dean would die a thousand deaths for Sam.

"Now my question is who else do you love…gosh Dean I can't imagine fill me in."

"Did you seriously just say the word "gosh"? Wow that's creepier than that big overblown speech you just made …Dick."

"You didn't answer my question, who else do you love?"

"I wouldn't tell you in a million years you jack hole."

Nothing worked, the more Dean stood up to him the more he liked it. Dick thrived off the challenge but Dean didn't care if he never left him alone as long as it distracted him from Sam.

…..

Sam was in the ring riding Jezebel slowly, Billy was leading the horse, "Sam you're a natural! Jezebel can feel all that good energy you're giving off; horses are sensitive to that you know…trust me Mister Roman doesn't ride because none of them like him."

Billy started laughing at his own private joke and Sam grinned as they picked up just a bit of speed. Billy let go and Jezebel took Sam around the ring twice as the boys laughter rang out and Billy thought that was nicest sound he ever heard anywhere on Dick Roman's property in all the years he had been there.

…

Dick opened Deans robe leaned down sucking a nipple in his mouth, Dean hated it because he thought it felt good and he felt the nipple stiffen in response. He rested his head back and closed his eyes letting the man do what he wanted and gave in to the physical pleasure.

Soon Dean felt a mouth over his cock taking him in and the feeling was incredible, the skill of the tongue and lips engulfing him was too much after awhile and he moaned loudly trying to pump his hips in the air until he felt a finger sliding cleft of his ass and tentatively circle the tight muscle.

That was when Dean bucked hard pushing Dick off him as he shot semen over the leather ottoman then rolled to the floor. He crawled a few feet and then got up quickly turning around and standing there panting, "No…not with you…not ever."

Dick wiped his mouth and sat up, he was hard and leaking ready for Dean and now he was angry. Dean could see the payment would be painful for the rejection so he quickly went over and dropped to his knees taking the cock in his mouth and getting his benefactor off as best as he could.

It worked, Dick griped the couch leather and pushed from the excitement of Dean's eager to please mouth and for once he heard Dick Roman let out a wild cry of ecstasy filling the Dean's throat. When it was over his eyes shot open as if he realized he lost control, that at that moment of an orgasm he didn't expect that way the vulnerability was terrifying.

Dean now knew that he had some sort control no matter how small.

…..

Sam was eating a cheeseburger on the patio with Billy when Dean walked out with Dick. Sam smiled up at his brother and pushed a plate over for him, "Did you get all your work done Dean?"

"Yeah Sammy I did, how's the burger?"

"Great Dean hurry up and eat yours before it gets cold, then can we go home? Cas is going to help me with my homework."

Dick sat down and smiled, "Cas…who is that?"

Sam ran a french fry through the ketchup and failed to notice Dean silently pleading with Sam to stop talking, "Our neighbor down the hall, Cas is great. He fixed my bad tooth and cooks for us…oh and he's smart, super smart and studies weird creatures."

Sam paused to eat the fry then continued, "Cas is like Billy…you know, one of the good ones. Dad always said there were good people in the world and you just had to keep your eyes open. Like in the movies, there is always a bad guy and a good guy…you gotta know which one is which or you get in trouble."

Dick gave Sam an amused smile, "And what am I Sam."

Sam shrugged, "I won't say…but I'm not a stupid kid, I can tell good people from bad people." That was when Sam locked eyes with Dick Roman and the merry hazel grew hard and cold.

It threw Dick off his game and for a moment the boy sent a chill through him.

Dean shifted uncomfortably, "We gotta get back now so can we go?"

Billy noticed the exchange and smiled at Sam who he had a sudden admiration for, he got up slowly and held his bad back, "I'll take em back Mister Roman."

"No Billy I'll take them myself, thank you."

….

This time Dean sat between them in the truck and Sam got out first, "Go upstairs Sam, I'm going to say goodbye to Mister Roman." Sam leaned over and stuck out his hand, "Thanks for the riding lesson and the burger."

Dick stared at the hand then at Sam and quickly shook it, "Sure Sam any time." He watched Sam hop out, unlock the door and walk inside.

"Your brother is a curious little thing isn't he? Why would he want to shake hands…strange."

"Because my brother is a good kid and has manners even with a douche bag like you, let me make this clear Dick, Sam is never going to your house again. I don't want you to pick him up from school either got it?"

Dick gripped the steering wheel tightly, "I do what I want Dean…don't push me, the more you push the more attractive Sam becomes. A forbidden object is always more appealing than one that's easy to obtain."

Dean knew he went just too far and despite how much he didn't want to do it he worked a kiss over Dicks mouth the whispered, "Remember it's me you want…right?"

"Don't worry Dean that won't change, now get out."

…

Sam stood at their apartment window and watched as Dean got out, the truck drove away and his brother vomited on the sidewalk. Sam watched the cherry red truck turn a corner, he sat there waiting for Dean but he never came because Dean went to the basement.

TBC


	10. Insidious Tendrils

The rest of October passed uneventfully and Dean still had plenty of money for November. True to his word Dean never answered any of Dick Romans calls and made sure Sam was safe at the bus stop every single day after school.

Sam was actually running to the bus stop to get there early to watch for Dean, he was concerned his brother would leave with Dick Roman and never return.

…..

November 15th

Dean stood in line at the gas station with a gallon of milk that night so Sam had some for cereal in the morning. Every outing was tinged with fear of running into Dick Roman and that night Dean's luck ran out.

The black Mercedes Benz SUV pulled into the gas station and Dick got out to pump his own gas. Dean quickly paid for the milk and slipped out the door heading for the street when he heard his name called.

"Dean where do you think you're going?"

He froze and turned, "I have to get back…I ..I have a couple weeks yet."

Dick paid with a credit card, pocketed the receipt and started to walk over. The car behind him waiting for gas honked and Dick pointed to Dean, "Don't move."

He went over to the driver's side of the car and when the angry man rolled down the window Dick grabbed his jacket lifting him partly out.

Dean swore he heard a screech and growl before Dick jammed his lips against the man's ear and started whispering. He shoved him back inside then watched as the car backed out quickly and took off.

"Be right there Dean hang on." Dick pulled out a bottle of hand sanitizer and applied it liberally to his hands then walked over to Dean flashing a big white smile, "Anyway sorry about that, I've missed you." He grabbed the milk from Dean and dragged him by the hand back to the SUV.

Dean gave up and got in, his hands were freezing and when Dick started the vehicle he stuck them by the heater. "I can't stay too long, Sam is waiting for me."

Dick took his red hands and warmed them in his then kissed each one, "I didn't realize how much I missed you until I couldn't get a hold of you. Your very special to me…that reject last time was painful. You know that at some point I'm going to play with your ass and fuck you."

"I'm saving that for someone special someday I can't."

Dick laughed, "Who your brother? Come on Dean when is Sam going to do that, eleven...twelve…thirteen…"

Dean grabbed the milk and tried to leave, "I'm not talking to you about this. It's my personal stuff and you have sex with everyone but I don't, I wouldn't have had sex with you if I didn't need money."

"Dean you're such a prude sometimes it amazes me, someday I'm going to get that cherry you saved for this little brother of yours and that's a fact."

Dean gripped the handle tightly, "No its not, I'm not one of those whores in your stable…I'm a hunter, I help people."

Dick pulled out of the gas station and glanced over smirking at Dean, "A hero that can't even save himself? Doesn't sound like much of one to me."

….

Dick pulled up in front of Dean's building, he shut off the vehicle and slid his arms around the boy and they started to kiss, he pulled Dean into a straddle and grabbed his ass with both hands, "Dean I have to get in there or I'll go crazy, just let me finger you right now."

Dean felt his pants being opened and tugged down and a cool hand explore just outside as he tightened, "I'm not clean and I know you don't like that." He felt the hand leave, Dick made a disgusted face and pushed him off, "Your right get out."

Dean pulled up his pants and grabbed the milk.

He quickly got out, unlocked the door and ran upstairs into the apartment and stuck the milk in the fridge. He looked around for Sam then went down the hall and knocked on the door, Sam yelled, "Come in Dean."

The smell of food hit him and his mouth watered, Castiel was moving around the tiny kitchenette cutting a meatloaf and dishing out mashed potatoes and green beans.

Dean sat on the couch next to Sam who was doing homework on the laptop.

He watched Castiel standing there with his weight shifted on one hip in baggy sweat pants that were slid down enough to expose the swell of his full, firm rear. Their one night together rubbing cocks was his only experience with him and it made Dean want more.

Dean wondered what it would be like to touch him there in that spot reserved for someone special and if Dean would like it, there was something about Castiel that made him want to own him. He wanted to wrap himself in that warm gentle body and never let him go.

He shook off the thoughts and went to the table with Sam where they all ate together. Sam talked about horseback riding and the nice guy that helped him, about school and his achievements. Under the table he touched Dean's leg and smiled, "Dee tell Cas about something."

He hunkered down and shoveled food into his mouth, "I'm eating sorry."

Castiel started to talk about his research and how he would love to take the boys out in the field sometime. After the meal Dean gathered up Sam's books and told him to go back and get ready for bed.

"Aren't you coming Dean?"

"In a little bit Sam, get the bed warmed up for me ok?"

….

Dean sat at the table with Castiel and rubbed his arm, "Can we kiss?"

"I don't know Dean it's not why I'm here, that thing we did, it was the wrong thing for me to do with you."

"But you liked it I could tell, you love me right?"

"Yes."

Dean got up and stood in front of him and opened his jeans pulling himself out, "Touch me…please Cas?" Instead of touching him the angel hugged Dean around the waist and buried his face in his sweatshirt.

Dean closed his eyes and pressed against him moaning softly, "kiss it…touch it…please Cas." He felt warm fingers tracing gently over the tender skin and lips kiss like feathers teasing and then it stopped.

Dean opened his eyes and looked down at the blue eyes staring up at him filled with love and passion but apprehension and fear as well. He stood up and tucked Dean back in closing the zipper, "Go to Sam now and get some sleep, Dean your only fourteen."

Dean felt like he was drowning in emotions and there was no way to be saved, he grabbed Castiel and forced his crotch against him moving until he reached orgasm and came until the wetness seeped through the denim then left quietly leaving the angel again confused.

…..

He undressed, slipped under the covers and shut off the light, Sam was watching him in the dark and Dean felt a small hand move over his waist and relax, "Dean promise you won't go downstairs."

"I promise Sam."

….

The end of the month came and Dean left a note for the landlord asking if there was any work that needed to be done around the building to offset the rent and he was still waiting to hear back from him.

It was almost December and despite the poor circumstances Christmas was still a happy time for Dean. Even though John was gone he was determined to make the best of it for Sam and that morning Dean went to take a shower to get ready for a day at the mall with his brother.

They couldn't afford anything other than bus fare there and back and a couple slices of pizza in the food court but it was still exciting for them both and tomorrow was a free day at the museum, Dean was going to bring Sam and let him nerd it up in style.

Then Dick Roman showed up.

….

Dean was in the shower getting ready for their big weekend when a knock came, Sam grabbed a knife and approached pressing his ear against the door, "Who is it?"

"Dick Roman, remember me Sam? Dean's boss…you came riding and…"

"Yeah I remember you, what do you want?"

"I need to see Dean…look I know he's there."

"Dean is taking a shower, we're leaving soon."

"I have money for him."

Sam sighed when he heard that and unlocked the door, he went back and sat on the couch dejected.

Dick walked in and glanced around the room with a look on his face as if he just stepped in something horrible, "You both live in one room…you eat and sleep in the same place? What a dump Sam, you should both come live with me."

Sam snorted, "Yeah I don't think so, Dean and I like it just fine."

Dick sat next to Sam and looked at him closer, Sam was in boxers and Dick could already see the long limbs starting and the muscle tone even at that age. Sam slid over away from Dick.

Dick closed his eyes resisting the urge to tug them off and go on a deep tongue exploration, he fantasized about it because Sam was so pretty and all he wanted to do was make him scream.

The only things holding him back was Dean and the fact that Dick Roman wanted supplication, he needed everyone on their knees and begging to have their business interests taken over, their lives ruined and to be fucked, owned and broken until there was nothing left.

Dick Roman was a monster in every sense of the word.

…..

Dean was humming to himself fixing his hair just right in the mirror when he heard Sam talking to someone, he pressed his ear to the door and glanced over at his pistol.

"Sam I think you and Dean would love my estate, I have everything there you could ever want in the entire world."

"Oh my mom and dad are alive and living there then?"

"Of course not, don't be stupid."

"Then you don't have everything I could ever want."

"You know Sam I used to think you were a good boy but now I see you're a snotty little smartass, the problem with you is I bet you never had real discipline. It's nothing a good, hard spanking wouldn't fix."

That was when Dean heard the hard slap, he grabbed the gun and pushed open the door, "Get the fuck away from my brother!"

Dean was surprised to see Sam standing there holding the knife and Dick gingerly touching his bottom lip where it split, Sam's face was flame red and he was shaking, "Don't ever touch me again or I'll gut you like a …monster."

Dick stood up and grabbed his coat, "Dean it's time to earn your rent. Get dressed and meet me in the car."

Dean checked his phone and the message from the landlord saying he didn't have anything for him, he could give John a one week extension but then he better have the rent money.

Dean's shoulders slumped, "Sam I'm sorry…I can't go today, tomorrow I promise and then I'll have money."

Sam sat down and glared at Dick Roman, "You ruin everything, I hate you…I wish Dean never would have met you."

Dick stared down at him with a dark intensity, "Then that snow falling outside wouldn't seem so pretty sleeping in a cardboard box now would it Sam. Dean get your ass moving."

Dean quickly dressed and hugged his brother whispering, "Sorry Sammy I'll be back don't worry." He handed Sam the phone, "You keep this and I'll call and let you know I'm ok."

Sam grabbed his sleeve, "Please don't go, there's always a way Dean, a better way."

Dean took the hand Dick held out to him, "Not for us Sam…no better way for us."

…

Dick pressed Dean against the wall in the hallway and licked his neck, "The next two days are going to be off the hook, I'm showing you off and having a stable party…baby you are going to see the real Dick Roman, how I acquire my power and how I make all the most powerful men in the world dance like puppets. Money, money and more money, so much your eyes would bleed trying to count it all and the best part is the sex and destruction. Ready for all that…can you take it?

Dean stammered, "ye..yeah I guess."

Dick bit his neck lightly and purred, "Grown men have broken after one of my parties but you're not weak …oh fuck no my baby isn't weak." He was breathing heavily and dark eyes glittering, he grasped his wrist and dragged Dean away.

…..

Sam watched from the window as Dean got in the car, he knew his brothers body well and what the posture told Sam that there was a break starting. Something was letting go inside of Dean and Sam had to stop it from getting worse before it was too late.

The white, fluffy snow covered the garbage cans, the cars and buildings and Sam wished he could have enjoyed the beauty of the year's first real snow but knew underneath was nothing but ugliness and lies.

TBC

(Next several chapters are a dark look into the real life of Dick Roman)


	11. The Puppet Master

Dean nervously jiggled his leg watching the snow come down out the window, "What do I have to do?"

Dick took his hand and forced him to stop, "Why do you always have to make it sound so horrible, honestly for the money I've given you for what little you've done and that punch and rejection I should just…never mind."

"Just what?"

Dick smiled, he planted a seed and watched it grow, "Just nothing, be a good boy and you won't have to find out." Dean pressed his forehead against the window to feel the cold, he wondered if Sam could forgive him for leaving. Dick fished a phone out of the console and tossed it to Dean, "Here, Sam can keep that phone of yours but this one is for you, when I call you better answer."

Dean looked at it like a strange alien artifact turning it in his hands, "So can I call Sam?"

"Call whoever you want Dean, I really don't give a damn, just answer when I call."

Dean dialed and Sam answered, "Hey Sammy just checking in, I ..uh..I'm fine and I have some cleaning and stuff to do at Dick's house so I don't know when I'm going to be home but it will be for sure by tonight."

Dick frowned, "Oh no tomorrow Dean your spending the night. I'm throwing a party and I want to show you off."

Dean closed his eyes and braced himself, "Sam go stay by Cas tonight if you get scared or lonely, I won't be home until tomorrow."

Sam was feeling like crying when he heard that, "Dean please come home tonight you can't leave me alone…I miss you Dean."

"Come on Sammy your ten don't be a baby just…please don't make this hard for me, I love you bye." Dean hung up and wiped his eyes, "I hope you're happy."

"Oh not yet but I will be later."

…..

Sam went down the hall and just walked right into Castiels apartment without knocking he laid on the bed with him and hugged him.

Castiel rolled over and opened his eyes, "Sam what's wrong?" Sam squeezed him tightly, "Dean promised to take me to the mall and look at stuff and tomorrow we were going to free day at the museum and that ass Dick came and took him…he's not coming home until tomorrow."

Sam started crying, he hated doing it and it made him feel weak when dad would have told him to be strong but the dam broke and the tears came anyway despite his best efforts.

Castiel watched him and frowned, the Winchesters were confusing him and he never knew what was right to do or wrong. He patted Sam's head, "It will be fine Sam."

"No it won't, can't you help him?"

Castiel wiped the tears with his thumb and looked at Sam sadly, "Dean has to ask for help." Sam sat up as anger ran through him, "That's crap, you're his friend and you should help, you're the grown up!"

"It's very complicated Sam, things have to happen…they have to go in an order otherwise those experiences wont develop someone into what they are destine to be, you and Dean will be great people and do important things."

"You don't know anything; if you loved us you'd help me Cas."

"I'm here to make sure you stay alive and that's all, its…"

"Yeah complicated, I don't know what you are but I thought you were my friend."

Sam got up and left slamming the door behind him, Castiel closed his eyes and tried to forget the Winchesters but it was no use.

…..

Sam ran to the laundry room but there was a woman there hanging shirts and her baby was on the folding table. Sam trudged back up to the apartment and went inside, he found John's book on things he had encounter and Sam started studying everything. He was tired of feeling bad and tired of missing his brother, all Sam wanted was to be like everyone else but he knew that would never happen. He decided to take the bad path life handed him and at least try to smooth out the rough spots as he struggled along.

….

"Wow aren't you a big bag of depression, glad I wasted the trip."

Castiel sat up, looked over at the couch and there sat Gabriel, "Brother what are you doing here?"

"You can't stay on task can you? All these distractions…look kid just keep them alive, get em from point A to point B and be done with it." He appeared on the bed next to Castiel, "Your problem is all these feelings."

"I don't know what you mean."

"Your feelings for Dean, geez man he's what…fourteen? Then again he knows more than you do so maybe he's taking advantage of you. You parade around heaven wearing that virginity of yours like a badge of honor when you should be having a good time."

"It's complicated Gabriel, you couldn't understand what it's like to love someone like that and know that you can never truly have them. Age is not the issue; it's not my place to have feelings for him. It's not my task but I love him just the same."

"You got that right brother, go out and get laid. Once that pesky virginity is gone your eyes will open up to a whole new world."

Castiel got up and poured a cup of coffee, "Would you like some, I find I've acquired a taste for it."

"No thanks, just checking in to keep you on track, don't get your heart broken…let go Castiel, you know Dean will end up with Sam anyway."

Gabriel vanished having left Castiel even more depressed than before he got there.

….

When they pulled up to the mansion there were extra men in attendance and when they entered Dean was surprised to see all the boys from the stable there milling around talking, eating and drinking.

They all seemed showered, primped and ready for something but Dean didn't know what. Seeing them all together he guessed the ages ranged from about thirteen to late teens and he couldn't imagine how Dick had gathered them all and kept them without parents or someone caring enough to look for them.

Dick seemed to read his mind and as they worked through the boys he pointed out that most of them were runaways, street kids or ones he acquired at auction. None of them were allowed to leave unless he gave permission. "Remember that Dean, these are sheep. Your special because your mine…I own them but they bore me after awhile."

The boys ignored Dean and tried to catch Dick Romans eye, Dean figured if he was left alone with them they would all tear him apart out of jealously or drop to their knees to have his favor.

Each one was handsome or pretty, clean and kept well. Manicures, pedicures and all the trimmings. Some were naked, the younger ones in robes.

Dean could feel the undercurrent of nervousness and fear running through the room, he felt it on hunts with his dad in large groups of hunters and it rolled through like a sickness.

…..

Dick watched Dean undress as he sat on the bed, "Bend over I want to look at you..spread you legs when you do it."

Dean sighed and bent over, he felt hands pull his ass open and a thumb circle and press then back off. Then a warm, wet tongue began to probe. Dean remembered that boy screaming as Dick Roman retracted a very long tongue from his body and Dean decided he didn't want to be tongue raped.

He stood up and turned around, "No not that, not you…I saw what you did to that kid, why didn't I see him out there?"

Dick shrugged, "I was tired of him, I sent him home…ask your neighbor Cas what that means when someone goes home."

"Don't talk about Cas, leave him alone. He's off limits along with Sam, Cas is a good guy and doesn't deserve to be exposed to you."

"That's who you love isn't it Dean, or is he your Sam sex replacement? Seems to me you're the one that's hurting him."

Dean put on a robe and sat down, "I'm done with your stupid speeches and guessing games, what do I have to do? I better get paid good for an overnight, how much?"

Dick let out an involuntary laugh, "Dean you fucking shark, look at you bargaining for cash! I'm proud of you …you're a little like me." He tossed clothes on the bed, "Put these on, you're not a whore like the ones downstairs. I'm going to show you off and make all of those pricks beg for something they can't have."

Dean tugged up the tight jeans, they were cut so low that the swell of his ass was squeezed out at the top and his pubic line showed in the front, he slid his hand in and tried to adjust his cock and balls so they didn't ache. The crotch material was sanded thin so everything showed straining against the fabric.

He pulled on the short, tight black t shirt and looked in the mirror, "I look friggin' ridiculous…is there a street corner I should be standing on or what?"

Dick patted Dean's crotch, "Now I know why your little brother is such an insufferable little bastard, he gets it from you. Tonight I'm going to show you how to control and get what you want Dean…how to acquire wealth and power over others and I'm not talking about those little whores."

Dean was slightly intrigued despite how much he hated the man, "What do you mean?"

Dick kissed the palm of his hand and his voice dropped, "Just watch me make them all dance for and see what I own by the end of the night."

TBC


	12. Roman Orgy

Dean had several drinks before he went to the massive ball room, the layout was bigger than most grand houses and it was beautiful. The massive gothic fireplace was roaring and the snow fell fast outside the rows of glass doors leading to the wrapping marble walkway.

There was a bar set up and private sitting areas with leather couches, there was a balcony like an opera house with two chairs, Dick and Dean sat in them and watched the well dressed men mill around talking and shaking hands, making contacts and laughing.

Stripper poles were dotted around the room floor to ceiling looking out of place and speakers were hidden around the room, Dean from his vantage point could see cameras.

There was an undercurrent running through the room as the music started, Dean could feel it. Dick was like a conductor, he had done this many, many times over the years and grinned down at them all, eyes dark and glittering in the firelight.

Dean was shocked to see Dick Roman was erect, his cock pushing against the fabric but he was sharp and focused. "Are you ready Dean, ready to see your master at work?"

Dean was going to mention he wasn't Dean's master but at that moment it wouldn't have mattered.

Dean was slowly becoming desensitized, "Yeah go for it I want to see this."

Dick Roman grabbed a microphone and yelled, "Welcome gentleman…welcome to a hedonistic Roman festival, I have a stable of pretty meat for you filthy pricks…remember men you break it you buy it, enjoy!"

They all looked up and cheered for Dick Roman and he waved like an emperor then did a fist pump and let out a guttural scream more animal than anything.

He grabbed Dean and started kissing him pushing his cock against his and was insatiable, Dean gave in and relaxed into him actually glad he wasn't down with the masses. Dick whispered, "Remember baby on top is always the best position to be in."

Suddenly the music started and "Rock You Like A Hurricane" came over the speakers then the doors burst open, all the older boys were brought in and immediately started working the room.

It's early morning  
The sun comes out  
Last night was shaking  
And pretty loud  
My cat is purring  
And scratches my skin

So what is wrong  
With another sin  
The bitch is hungry  
She needs to tell  
So give her inches  
And feed her well….

Dean had never witnessed such a sight in his life, it was surreal, dark and he felt weak in the knees watching them swing on poles or undulate for the men, some were naked and sitting on laps already and others were thrown on couches and ravished by groups of men.

A scream came from an area in the corner as someone was hurt and Dean imagined one of them being gang raped. He started to panic and backed away right into a tall, built body guard, "Mister Roman are you ready to go down?"

"In awhile Henry, is the security room getting all this?"

"Yes of course Mister Roman."

"Excellent."

…..

Dean sat on the bed griping the pillow tightly feeling like his heart would pound out of his body, he could hear it all and it was horrible. Screams and moans, harsh music and dark laugher and the smell of sex was everywhere. Dean imagined it was like being in hell for the boys and he wanted to bolt and run until the cold over took him and he fell asleep forever.

"Dick…where are the younger boys?"

Dick held out a pill, "Take it, get the edge off so you don't sit there like a frozen lump." Dean pushed it away, "No I had drinks I don't take pills."

"Fine do you want another drink?"

"Sure."

Dick went over and made him another drink then poured the capsule in and swirled it until it disappeared, "Here Dean drink it down and lets go." Dean drank it quickly and started coughing.

"Good Boy."

"I don't get it, you don't even need to do this big elaborate whatever this is Dick. You're a fucking billionaire and I don't even know what else you are, you're nuts!"

Dick sighed, "I'm not nuts I'm bored, this is my entertainment and if I acquire more power than that is the sweet red cherry on the sundae. I'm cut off here in this world and a man can only golf so much."

Dean sneered, "Cry me a fucking river you freak."

Dick gave him an amused smile, "Oh Dean I love it when you act all tough but I know your shaking inside like the scared little boy you are and that's a turn on so keep the barbs coming baby because it only makes me want you more."

…

They moved through the crowd and all the men wanted to see who Dick Roman had on his arm, one man tried to touch Dean and got a belt to the face for his troubles from Henry.

"Look at them Dean, it's like you're the most desirable object in the world and everyone wants to own you. I'm good looking but not like you, you're an angel…beautiful and precious. I envy you that."

Dean stopped him and pressed his lips to Dicks ear, "Don't make me do anything with them, I won't …I'll run." Dick could sense him breaking down partly from the booze and drugs and second because his resolve was slowly dying and he was seeing Dick as a protector. "Dean I will never let anyone hurt you."

Dean whispered, "Where are the other boys?" Dick took his hand and led him out of the writhing mass of darkness down several long halls and ending up at a steel door, Dick went in and Dean followed. There were men sitting in front of monitors and watching the sexual frenzy happening, they would pan and zoom then take a clip and save it.

Every man that came was subject to scrutiny, Dick pointed to another bank of monitors and there were the other boys, the ones most fragile in individual bedrooms with a man doing things that made Dean look away, he was thankful the sound was off.

Dick pointed, "Everyone there is going to pay but the ones in the rooms with those boys…well let's just say that by the end of the week I'm going to own a lot of lives. Gotta love it Dean, business is tough and I'm at the top."

Dean was feeling woozy and hung onto Dicks arm, "I'm…I don't feel so good…tired."

"Well let's get you in bed then, can't hold your booze I see." He snapped his fingers and Henry easily lifted Dean up and over his shoulder.

…..

Dean's eyes slowly opened and when his head turned on the pillow Dick was there watching him, he felt fingers between his legs slick and probing, "Dean give me permission to play with you, no fucking but I have to feel it."

Dean mumbled, "No…I ..I'm..Sam…just Sammy."

Dick Roman had a choice, he could ignore Dean and finger fuck him, rape him and do anything he wanted or he could stick by his plan of breaking someone down to the point where they begged for it just so they could survive.

"You fucking brat, let me…say it."

Dean moaned low and deep, "Noooo…no it's for Sam." Dean couldn't keep his eyes open anymore and fell asleep.

Dick stared down at him then groped everything but never went inside, he sucked Dean and all he got was the boy's cock plumping up and laying to the side. Frustrated he left Dean and went upstairs to another bedroom.

There was one of the stable boys there ready to go, a handsome blonde but then they were all pretty or handsome and Dick thought they were boring. Dean had scars and grit, he was strong and rough around the edges.

Dick straddled the boy and pinned his shoulders, "Are you the virgin?" The blonde nodded and stared up at him with eyes as big as saucers, "Are you scared of me?" He shook his head no.

Dick smiled with a mouth full of white, wicked teeth, "Well you should be."

The screams echoed down the halls.

…

Sam crept back to Castiels room and got into bed with him, Sam hated sleeping alone and the angel was the one person he could trust besides Dean.

Castiel felt his warm little body hug up next to his and he relented pulling Sam into his arms and holding him tight.

Sam's voice came softly, "Thanks Cas I'm lonely."

"It's fine Sam I wish I could make it better for you…do more."

"I know I forgive you."

…..

Sam woke up and crawled on top of Castiel to get to the window, the snow was deep and there weren't many cars on the street. Sam sighed and knew his brother still wasn't home.

"Sam you are on my stomach."

Sam stretched out onto of him like he did to Dean to keep warm, "Sorry…you wanna have breakfast?"

"Alright Sam what do you want to eat?"

"Pancakes."

Castiel tried to move but Sam didn't budge, the angel heard him softly snoring and settled back down wondering if he should roll Sam off or wait for him to wake up. He decided to wait it out and stared at the ceiling patiently.

…..

Dean woke up with a pounding headache and a queasy stomach, he shuffled to the bathroom, locked the door and went in the shower standing under the stray of water the promptly threw up.

When he got out the sheets were changed and fresh clothes were laid out for him, there was a stack of money with a note.

"Dean, Henry will bring you home. Don't forget your phone. Richard Roman"

Dean changed, took the phone and the money, he went downstairs to the foyer and sat there waiting for Henry. The man came out with a winter coat, boots and gloves, "Put these on."

Dean put them on and when he was done Henry handed him a bag, "These are winter clothes for Sam. Let's go."

Dean closed his eyes and when the SUV stopped he opened them and they were already in front of the building, he was going to thank Henry but the man stared straight ahead and didn't seem like someone that cared about such things.

…..

Dean walked in Castiels apartment and stopped dead in his tracks, the angel was trapped under Sam who was now snoring like a buzz saw.

Castiel rolled his head to the side and whispered loudly, "I was afraid to move, he has been sleeping like this for hours it seems. Don't be cross with me Dean I didn't ask him to do this."

Dean smiled for the first time in twenty four hours, he dropped the bag, stripped to his boxers and crawled in the little bed and covered them all up. "Do you mind one more?"

Castiel frowned and looked at Sam who was drooling on his chest and Dean who was snuggled into the crook of his arm, "Its fine, do you snore?"

Dean took his arm and put it over him, "I don't know I'm sleeping. I love you Cas." Castiel closed his eyes and fought the words but they came out anyway, "I love you too Dean."

TBC


	13. Lying Like Pearls

Dean sat there holding the keys to the Impala missing her terribly, "Hey Sammy you want to go visit the car this weekend? If it makes you too sad…"

Before he could finish Sam answered quickly, "Yeah I want to see her, I miss the car Dean."

"You know we can't take her yet, I gotta get my license and pass Drivers Education and all that crap."

"Sure but we can still see her, Dean maybe we can bring back dads stuff."

Dean fingered the keychain with a lucky seven dangling off from it and smiled, "Sure Sam that would be great but we can't bring it back on the bus."

…

That night after Sam was asleep Dean slipped into Castiels apartment, immediately dropped Johns robe and got under the covers. When the angel left the bathroom he walked over and looked down at Dean, "Dean we can't do this again."

Dean moved over tight to the wall, "I'm not leaving; I just need you to hold me."

"You have Sam for that."

Dean pulled back the blanket and he was semi erect already, "I can't go back, please we can do what we did last time…you really loved it I know because you came with me."

Dean moved over and sat up pulling down the angels boxers and began a series of tentative licks as the cock filled out slowly. He carefully covered his teeth with his lips as he took it in his mouth and began to suck. Dean rolled his eyes up and the angel had his eyes closed, mouth slack. The expression was pained as if he was committing a terrible sin but he didn't tell Dean to stop.

That was when Dean realized that truly the man was a virgin in every respect and what he said was no exaggeration. It put Dean at ease that anything he did wouldn't be judged and he wouldn't be belittled for making a mistake.

He confidently experimented a little using his fingers to roll the warm, loose balls in his hand feeling the weight and then gripped his thighs as Castiels knees buckled from the orgasm but Dean caught him.

Castiel fell back on the bed and opened his eyes watching Dean run his tongue over his lips catching the sticky drops lying like pearls and the angel thought there was nothing in heaven or on earth that compared to Dean's handsome face.

Dean kissed his neck and whispered, "My turn, roll over, don't worry I won't hurt you…do you trust me?"

"Yes Dean."

He rolled over and hugged the pillow waiting for the unknown and felt the pressure of the young man's weight on his back, Dean placed his cock along the cleft and began to thrust quickly never entering. It was only a few minutes before he was spilling over the angel's lower back and groaning his name.

When it was over Dean rested on top of Castiel and then got off covering them both with the blanket, he felt the warm comfort of the angels arms and fell asleep.

…

Sam pushed open the door to the apartment and looked over to the little bed, he whispered loudly, Cas do you know where Dean is?"

The angel bolted up and stared at Sam and then Dean, "Sam I'm sorry."

Dean got up rubbing his eyes and adjusting to the light in the room then saw his brother standing there, "Oh god…Sammy it's not what you think."

Sam balled up his fists, "Liars! You both pretend to be friends and you sleep together, Dean you left me alone!" Sam ran out of the apartment and slamming the door behind him.

Dean got up and ran to his apartment dressing quickly and went to the window, Sam was running down the sidewalk and Dean dashed out to get him.

…

Sam ran into a diner and hid in a booth, when the waitress came over he pushed two crumpled one dollar bills over to her, "Is this enough to buy something? I'm hiding."

She picked them up and looked at Sam, Loretta knew the kid had exactly nothing to his name, she sighed and slid the two dollars back, "I'll get you something hang on."

Loretta went back to the kitchen, "Hey Gary do we have any wrong orders or no shows for carryout? I got a little kid out there with two bucks and eyes are big as saucers."

Gary went over the carryout orders, he found one with a pick up time of a half hour ago still there, "here take this one and give it to him." Loretta grabbed the bag and a glass of water then brought it all over to Sam, "Here you go honey, it's a big surprise."

She left Sam alone, he opened the bag and looked in and there was a hamburger with everything on it and some French fries. He pulled them out and started dumping ketchup on the fries.

Sam was mad but he was still hungry.

…..

Dean checked every place up and down the block and then saw the diner, he peered in the window and spotted Sam sitting in a booth eating and breathed a sigh of relief. He went in, slid in the seat across from him and grabbed a fry, "Sam don't ever run away like that."

Sam stared at the food and shoved the burger over to Dean, "Take it I don't want it."

Dean shoved it back, "Sure you do Sammy your growing like crazy so I know you're hungry. Look Sam let me explain about what you saw."

Sam buried his head in his arms resting on the table, "Nothing to explain Dean, you had sex and you're a dirty liar."

"Sam how did I lie, I don't get it. Look we didn't have real sex I promise."

Sam raised his head and his eyes shimmered with tears, "You said you loved me…that I was special and you would never leave me alone."

Dean closed his eyes and rested his head back on the booth, "Sam it's complicated, I love you more than anyone ever and that's no lie, you're the most special person in the world to me and I won't ever leave you."

"What did you do with him if you didn't have sex Dean? You're a liar, a cheater and a jerk."

"Sam we kissed and touched and the rest wasn't …no, you know what? You're ten and I'm not going to explain this crap to you. You're my brother and you shouldn't even care if I do anything."

Sam finished off the fries, "You and Cas can have each other and be boyfriends."

Sam grabbed the hamburger and left with Dean right behind him, "Sammy, Cas is going to rent a car and go with us to get dad's stuff. I'm driving because for some weird reason he can't drive."

Sam walked quickly ahead, "I don't want to go you can go with your stupid boyfriend."

Dean fell into step, "Stop acting like a baby, I do everything I can to get us by and if I need some comfort then I don't have to answer to you got it?" Sam punched him in the shoulder and ran.

….

Sam stormed into Castiels apartment and sat on the couch breathing like a little angry bull, the angel turned from the table and sat there with his hands folded, "Sam may I speak to you about this?"

"You're my brother's boyfriend now."

"Sam it was comfort for both of us, Dean isn't my boyfriend. You're too young to…"

"Shut up, don't tell me what I'm too young for. I'm smart and I know your trying to take Dean away just like Dick Roman…everyone wants him and I'm going to end up alone."

Sam covered his face and screamed in frustration over his life, the one person he never expected to lose he felt he was losing forever. "Don't take him away, Dean is all I got left and I don't want to go to a foster home."

"Sam please I'm not taking him away I promise, he loves you." He went to hug him and Sam lashed out hitting him. Dean rushed in and grabbed his brother trying to pick him up but he got a swift kick for his troubles.

Sam fell to the floor and got up, suddenly calm, "Dean you can stay here I don't need you." He went back to the apartment and locked the door.

Castiel placed his hand on Deans shoulder, "Dean what can I do?"

"There's nothing you can do Cas, when Sam is pissed off he has to work it out and you can't push him."

…..

Dean didn't have his key and kept talking to Sam for an hour until he gave up and sat by the door leaning on it and eventually fell asleep. Sam listened and heard the soft snoring. He opened the door and shook his brother, "Dean come to bed."

Dean opened his eyes and got up making a lurch for the bed and flopped down exhausted, "Sorry Sam please don't hate me, I couldn't stand it if I lost you. I'd rather die…without you I got nothing."

He rolled on his back and Sam was staring down at him smiling despite everything, "You won't lose me Dean, you're too stupid to survive without me."

"God Sammy you're a little bitch."

Sam flopped back next to him and stared at the crack in the ceiling, "Yeah but I'm your little bitch."

Dean pushed his leg against Sam's, "You got that right, who else could stand you besides me?"

"I love you Dean."

"Love you too Sammy."

….

Thanksgiving came and the day started somber, their first one without John, the break with Castiel and the fear of Dick Roman hung over the boys like a storm cloud waiting to burst open.

They went to a Chinese restaurant down the block and Sam came back to the table with baby corn and noodles, Dean came back with a plate of meat and two pieces of sauce covered broccoli hoping Sam wouldn't say anything but he did anyway, "Dean there is like a million things to eat and you have mystery meat?"

Dean leaned over and made a gagging sound, "Hi I'm Sam and all I eat is noodles and…what the hell is that?"

"Baby corns dumbass."

"I think it's just called baby corn unless you're giving them all names and keeping them as pets…dumbass."

It was a good Thanksgiving after that because they laughed and gave each other a Winchester sized extra helping of grief.

After the brothers were done they got their fortune cookies, this was always the exciting part for them both and Sam was holding his up to the red lantern trying to use x ray vision to see inside, Dean nudged him with his foot, "Go on open it."

"No you first Dean I like to wait."

"Fine weirdo."

Dean opened his slowly because anything it said couldn't be good for him, he held it up and read it out loud, "Accept a helping hand to find a path to happiness." Dean snorted, "What a load of crap." Despite his cynical feelings about it Dean carefully smoothed the little piece of paper and tucked it in his wallet.

Sam smiled and opened his, "A true hero can vanquish any monster."

Dean pouted, "Yours is cooler than mine."

Sam put the fortune in his wallet, got up and put on his coat, he looked around and when no one was looking he bent down and whispered, "Maybe I am a hero," then kissed Dean on the cheek.

Dean scrubbed his cheek with the sleeve of his jacket, "Gross Sam now I have baby corns…plural, on my face and noodle spit."

Sam kept walking, "I love you too."

Miss Ko was standing in the alley stacking crates and watched the boys walk by, she yelled, "Hope you like your fortune cookies!" They waved back and Sam shouted, "Awesome Miss Ko!" and kept on walking.

A light passed through her eyes as she smiled, the shadow of wings stretched and spread then retracted as she continued stacking.

…..

That night they talked about having three whole days off from school yet and what they were going to do together, the winter winds were kicking up outside and they crawled in bed to stay warm. Sam laid on top of Dean for mutual heat, Sam tried to kiss Dean on the mouth and when Dean turned away Sam whispered, "You kiss Cas like that."

"Cas is not ten and he's not my little brother I'm protecting…go to bed Sam…weirdo."

"Jerk."

…

Down the hall the angel lay there staring out the window and wondering why he hurt inside and why he cared so much. It was his first Thanksgiving and Castiel thought it was the loneliest day he ever experienced.

….

The phone rang in the middle of the night and Dean held it to his face and groaned, Dick Romans number popped up and Dean let it go to voicemail. He decided to deal with the consequences of that later.

…..

Dick was draped over the covers glaring at the phone working himself into a frenzy over Dean not answering, he took it out on the young man in bed next to him and grabbed his hair, he cried out and struggled which only put the Dick into prey drive.

He wrenched the slender legs open and pushed his way in groaning Deans name.

…..

Henry stood outside the door and listened to the long scream and then it stopped. His expression never changed.

TBC


	14. Dungeons & Diners

December 1st

Dean didn't go to see Castiel after the incident with Sam finding them together, Dean was willing to give up his own comfort for Sam because in the end he truly was all that Sam had in the world.

Dean made the best of it. Castiel was his safe sexual outlet for a fourteen year old confused over his role in Dick Romans life and the fear he could never escape and the feelings for a brother that he worried years down the road would change and grow until Dean was swallowed and died each time an older Sam rejected him and took another lover.

Dean Winchester was crumbling day by day but because the progress of the destruction was so slow, in such small increments he didn't notice as much. Nights were often spent in the stark basement laundry room where he could cry, lash out and torture himself in private then in the morning Sam would find him sleeping peacefully enough next to him.

It wasn't peace that put Dean to sleep it was exhaustion.

…

Castiel was locking his door and had a messenger bag slung across his body, Sam and Dean were just leaving to go get something to eat when they were all awkwardly stuck in the same hallway. Castiel lowered his eyes and nodded to them filled with shame over his mistakes real or not.

Sam looked up at Dean and noticed the shimmer in his eyes and the hand that started to move toward the man and dropped again. "Dean just go say hi…I don't hate him."

"Are you sure Sammy?"

"Yeah just…promise you won't leave me, you only love me right?"

Dean's tongue ran over his lips and wondered if he should lie to Sam and decided not to, "I love you Sam, you're my priority and I won't leave but I can't say I don't have love kind of feelings for Cas…its better if I don't see him anymore then."

Sam wanted to let him go anyway but the fear in the pit of his stomach made him selfish and he didn't say anything.

….

They sat at the diner across from each other and there was Sam blowing bubbles in his milk again staring at Dean over his glass, "You look nice, your eyes are nice."

Dean flicked ice water at him, "You're friggin' weird Sam." There was a grin on his face when he said it.

"Do I look nice?"

"You Sammy look like a kid with dirty mop of hair because you didn't take a shower since Friday."

"Yeah but I brushed my teeth, you never say I look good…I think I'm cute."

"Sure to the untrained eye but I've smelled you up close, man when you hit puberty I'm going to have to keep your sneakers in the hall…you look like your gonna stink."

"You're an ass Dean, a big jerky ass."

"Fine I'm such a jerk then buy your own breakfast."

Loretta came over and handed them both menus, Sam handed his bad and looked up at her sadly, "I can't afford breakfast, Dean won't buy me any and he won't share."

Sam put his jacket on and pulled on his gloves which luckily had a hole in the finger to make Sam extra pitiful. "I'll go back to the apartment and eat noodles I guess."

He started to slid out and Loretta stopped him, "Oh no you don't, a kid has to eat more than noodles, Dean really what is wrong with you!" She pinched Sam's dimpled cheek and smiled, "You stay right here you cute little bug and let auntie Loretta get you something to eat."

She folded her arms and looked at Dean, "And for you prince charming?" Dean narrowed his eyes and shot daggers at Sam, "Western scramble."

Loretta wrote it down, "Well big spender I'll be right back." As soon as she was out of sight Sam grinned at his brother and wiggled his finger at him through the hole in his glove, "Told you I was cute."

"She also said you were a bug, I vote for roach."

"I'll tell her you're a good guy if you admit I'm adorable and give me a kiss."

"Never, I don't give a crap what she thinks of me."

…..

Cas walked down the street with his bag of groceries acting the human when he smelled the diner food and the thought of a cheeseburger and a hot cup of coffee lured him to the door, he went in and was seated across the room from the boys. His back was to them and he never noticed they were there, if he had he would have kept on moving.

Castiel grabbed the menu examining it like he was handed the tablets of Moses until Suzette came over and leaned on the table tapping her pencil and showing off her cleavage, "I've never seen you around here, see anything you like…on the menu?"

Loretta stopped to chastise her on the way over with the boys order, "Stop flirting and get working hot pants."

She went over and gave the boys their food, Sam also got a piece of chocolate cake. Dean frowned, "What gives, I don't get any?" Loretta raised an eyebrow, "Maybe next time when you don't starve Sam to death." She gave Sam a side of bacon with his Western scramble.

Sam beamed up at her, she pinched his cheek again, "Anyone ever tell you you're a cutie?"

Sam laughed, "No but I bet they will from now on!"

She left and Sam waved a piece of bacon at Dean, "Oh this looks so good." Dean ignored him and Sam dropped the bacon then slid the plate over to Dean, "Ok you can have it, I'm going to the bathroom."

Dean grabbed the plate possessively, "Thanks for the announcement…cute Sam."

Sam wove through the crowd and went in where Castiel was washing his hands thoroughly. He didn't notice Sam who quickly peed and then went to stand next to him at the sink and started washing his hands.

He looked up at the angel and Cas finally noticed him, he broke into a rare smile and then turned back to the mirror remembering their last encounter.

"Hi Cas, I don't hate you."

"Well that is nice to hear thank you Sam, I didn't mean to hurt you in any way."

"I know…I don't get it though, whatever you did with Dean I don't like it…sex stuff."

Castiel started to get uncomfortable and went for the door, Sam grabbed his sleeve, "But Dean said I'm ten and I don't need to get it and I get confused sometimes but I miss you…actually I miss your cooking." Sam grinned up at him and broke the angels resolve.

"You are cute Sam, those dimples will get you far in life."

He threw up his arms, "Finally everyone admits I'm cute. Come and eat with us."

….

Dean was surprised when Castiel slid in across from him followed by Sam, "Hello Dean."

"Hey Cas what are you doing here?"

"Sam invited me…sorry I can leave."

Dean felt a heat in the pit of his stomach among other places, "No, no don't leave." He wanted to lunge over the table and grab the man tight forcing a hug and a kiss but he sat there being cool Dean Winchester, "I missed you, your cooking I mean."

Castiel watched as Suzette put his food down and handed him his bag of groceries, "I stuck your ice cream in our freezer so get it on the way out, you should be more careful with your food pretty eyes."

Castiel smiled gratefully at the help because he often felt clueless about the most basic things and the fact that ice cream would melt was something he never thought of.

Dean watched her ass as she walked away, "Pretty nice ass, she likes you."

The angel watched her and shrugged, "Well yes it is better to be liked than hated."

Dean rolled his eyes, "No I mean she …never mind."

The phone Dick Roman gave him started to vibrate and Dean ignored it but it kept going, he finally gave in and answered, "Yeah."

….

Dick Roman took Sunday off from his business and spent the morning in the dungeon with an eighteen year old he just acquired, the fact the boy was legal made him all the more boring but he had an incredibly high threshold for pain that Dick enjoyed immensely.

Jeremy was covered in bruises and a few bit marks but he wouldn't give in, finally Dick lowered him down and unshackled him. He kissed the strongly built brunette and smiled, "Your reward is money of course but you get to fuck me."

Jeremy waited for the punch line but none came and he realized Dick was serious, "You…you get fucked?"

Dick gave him a mouth full of sharp white teeth, "Of course now take off that cock ring and start fucking."

Dick lay on his back and waited, arms behind his head and the intimidated young man settled between his legs, "You want me to kiss you or…"

Dick raised his long legs and wrapped them around his waist, "For fucks sake just get on with it!" He grabbed Jeremy's cock and forced it inside him crying out from the pain of the size and lack of lubricant just the way Dick liked it.

Jeremy gave him what it seemed he wanted and pounded hard and fast forcing a gasp each time from the man and in a way it was satisfying to hurt him like he had hurt Jeremy.

Unfortunately Dick Roman loved it, the raw pain made him feel something, he felt alive and vital forcing himself over and over upward impaling himself until he let out a growl and came over their slapping stomachs.

Dick's long legs fell away and for a moment he was vulnerable, Jeremy didn't know it but that was the very point he could have cut the man's head off, burned the stump and end a world of misery but he was just a boy and cried out as he filled Dick Roman with semen then collapsed on top of him.

Dick's eyes snapped open focused and sharp, he shoved Jeremy off, "Go clean up, put on clean clothes, collect your money and go back to the stable." Jeremy left and Dick sighed, he was bored.

He dialed Dean's number and when he finally answered he heard noise in the background, "Where are you, why didn't you answer right away?"

…

Back at the diner Dean got up and walked away from the table, "I'm gonna have breakfast what do you want?"

"I'm bored, I'm sending some things over for you and next weekend I get you…got that? Oh and Thursday don't go to school because I'm taking you with me to Roman Enterprises."

"Sam won't let me miss school."

"Dean Thursday I'm showing up in a limo and we are going to Roman Enterprises, I don't care what that smartass little bitch brother of yours wants got it?"

"Don't talk about Sam like that you can go to hell!"

Dean hung up and went back to the table, Sam was pressed against Castiel tightly and had his face against his shoulder, "It was him right?"

"Yeah don't worry Sam I don't have to see him until next weekend."

Castiel reached across the table and grazed Dean's hand with his fingertips, "Please Dean I can help you…you need to ask for help."

"Cas I'm a big boy and I can take care of things just fine so don't treat me like a friggin' baby!"

Dean's cheeks flared angry at being taken as weak. Castiel lowered his eyes, "I'm sorry I think you are a strong human Dean, anyway would you both come for supper? I am feeling lonely without you both."

Sam looked imploringly at his brother and Dean relented, "Fine what time?"

…..

Dick laid there staring at the phone then smashed it against the night stand; he had every intention of taking Dean to Roman Enterprises on Thursday if he had to drag the boy out of class by the hair.

TBC


	15. Mend & Break

The boys walked in and Cas had the table set and the food out already, he looked nervous and stood there with his hands folded in front of him.

They sat down and Dean smiled at their host, "Cas sit down."

"Oh yes of course," he sat and lifted the cover of the casserole dish, he forgot to use a hot mitt but didn't seem to notice and the boys looked at each other.

"Well I made something with ground beef and things." Dean eyed the mix of rice, meat and vegetables.

"And things…Cas that sounds scary."

He held his napkin twisting it, "Its good, nothing strange I can make something else if…"

Sam kicked his brother under the table, "Dean is just being a jerk it looks great!" They ate while Sam talked between bites and Castiel moved the food around nodding and taking little tastes.

Dean watched him and finally said, "Just eat already…god you've been picking at that for half an hour. We are ok Cas, all of us."

He visibly relaxed, "Good." He drank his glass of wine down and poured himself another then started to eat.

Afterward Dean went back to the apartment with Sam and watched TV but he was distracted, Sam was working on his homework but kept looking at Dean, "Just go talk to him Dean I know you want to. Please come back though I miss you."

Dean's hands were shaking as he held Sam's face and kissed his cheek, "Thanks Sammy I love you I promise I'll be back."

Sam watched him leave and angrily pushed his books on the floor, he covered his face with a pillow and moaned his pain into it sick over letting Dean go, his only comfort was knowing he would come back to him.

…..

Castiel was putting the food away and cleaning up, Dean went over to help and they locked eyes briefly then kept working until every dish was washed. The angel grabbed the bottle of wine and tilted it drinking until it was gone and then sat on the couch.

Dean sat next to him and rubbed his thigh, "I missed you…I can't stay overnight anymore I promised Sam."

"I will be hurt in the end, loving you is wrong and I never should have come here."

Dean looked at him with confusion, "What are you talking about, are you drunk?"

He wiped his eyes, "Yes that's it, I'm drunk."

"Come on Cas don't cry…I don't know what do when someone cries." Dean sat on his knees, leaned over and kissed him long and deep, he got up and took his hands leading Castiel to the bed, "I missed touching you Cas you make me feel safe and wanted in a good way."

Dean undressed him as the angel just stood there passively not making a move to push him away or encourage him at all. He grabbed Castiel by the hips and turned him around then bent him over the bed and started to explore his body.

Castiel felt the light touch of fingers down his back and over his rear, they traveled between his legs then back up again. When Dean opened him and touched his tongue around the delicate skin he shuddered, "Cas I wouldn't do this for just anyone ever…I know it feels good, someone did it to me once."

Dean swirled and ran his tongue along the clean, smooth cleft and pushed tentatively at the puckered muscle. "You taste good, I don't think other people are like this at all are they…good like this."

Castiel looked back and caught the green eyes, "I don't know Dean I've never done this." He went to his knees and turned around facing Dean, "If we do more they might take me away…I would rather have your friendship than nothing at all."

Dean sat there kneeling in front of him then crawled between his legs and hugged him, "I don't know who you're talking about but I don't want to lose you again, so we can't do anything?"

" Dean I just want to hold you awhile, can we do that?"

"Yeah then I have to go."

They sat on the floor together for a long time just touching. For now that was just enough.

….

Wednesday when the boys got home from school there was a man waiting at the door with a mountain of bags and boxes, Dean felt for his knife and nodded for Sam to stay back, "Who are you?"

"I was paid to deliver this to a Dean Winchester."

"I'm Dean who is it from…what is all this?"

"Look kid just let me bring it in."

Dean looked in one of the shopping bags and all the boxes were wrapped in Christmas paper, "Alright but if you try anything I'll gut you."

The delivery man rolled his eyes, "Yeah sure you will." Dean opened the door and the man brought in all the boxes and bags then made a call, "Alright their home bring it in."

As if by magic men hauled up a box spring, mattress and a bed frame. They marched right in and started moving things around until the queen size bed was set up and the dirty old couch was hauled away, in its place was a leather love seat to save on room.

One of the men hitched his thumb toward the mountain of bags, "Bedding is in there, pillows in the box…we aren't maids, Merry Christmas." They left walking past Sam sitting in the hall.

He got up and ran inside slamming and locking the door behind him, "Dean what is all this? Wow look at this bed and…" Then it dawned on Sam there was only one person that would have given them all this and could afford it, "It's from Dick head right?"

Dean pulled a Christmas card out of a bag, "Merry Christmas, Richard Roman." Dean pulled a wrapped box out and it was made out to Sam, "This is for you." Sam pushed it away, "I don't want it, if we keep this stuff then he owns us."

Dean set the box on Sam's lap, "He won't ever own you Sam, he already owns me." Dean swallowed and looked down at his lap picking at a hole in his jeans, Sam saw that complaining would make things worse for his brother so he ignored Dean's comment and brightened up.

He ripped the paper off the box and there was a new laptop, "Wow its…it's too much." Dean glanced over and smiled, "Keep it Sammy, I earned it. You can do your school work on that."

"I like using the one at school." Sam ran his fingers over the box and felt excited then hated himself for feeling that way. He smiled, "Well heck let's see what else that asshole gave us, it's only Christmas presents, you can't own someone from giving a gift right?"

Dean felt better then, "Yeah your right! Ok let's see what else is in here." First they made the bed and pulled out all the boxes and bags, when it was all said and done both of them had laptops, tablets, mp3 players, a stereo with speakers, a new wardrobe each and gift cards to download music or pick out what they wanted from a store.

Another knock came and Dean opened the door cautiously, it was the delivery man again, he pushed past Dean and hauled in a flat screen TV, a dvd player and speakers setting it all up. An hour later he left without saying a word.

"Holy shit Sam look at all this stuff!"

Sam watched the happiness on his brother's face and let it be, for once Dean needed to feel good. Sam wasn't sure how Dean earned all of this but he knew it couldn't be from anything to be proud of and that's why he kept it all from Sam.

….

Thursday Dean was sitting in math class first period bored out of his mind when a woman from the office came to get him, "Dean your father came to pick you up for your appointment."

Before Dean could protest Dick Roman stepped in the classroom and smiled broadly at his teacher Miss Talbot, he was dressed sharply and the women noticed the expensive clothing, she watched Dick remove his leather gloves and suddenly wicked thoughts filled her head.

Dick stuck out his hand, she blushed and when she went to shake his hand Dick grabbed hers and kissed it instead.

Dean wanted to die a thousand deaths as everyone stared at him and then Dick.

Miss Talbot smiled shyly, "Mister Winchester it's good to finally meet you."

Dick beckoned for Dean, he grabbed his books and headed out the door, Dick squeezed her hand, "I'm so sorry to interrupt your class but I confess I wanted a peak at Dean's classroom and I see it's quite lovely."

He winked at her and let go of her hand, "You have warm hands Miss Talbot…you know what they say, warm hands, warm heart and I bet yours is delicious."

The meaning behind the comment was lost on her, she was too busy looking into the man's pretty eyes, "How did you know my name?"

Dick pointed to the name plate on her desk, "Well it's not because I'm magic." Dick waved to the class, "Stay in school kids or you never know where you might end up." His eyes were dark and glassy examining them all for weakness, "You might end up living in a stable otherwise."

He walked out chuckling to himself, "Come on Dean move that tight ass of yours we have a date at Roman Enterprises."

Dean followed him out to the limo and got in, they were confined together away from the world. "Take off your pants."

Dean folded his arms, "Excuse me? I don't think so." Dick tossed him a tube of lubricant. "Don't argue, we can swing by and pick up Sam…maybe he would do it?"

Dean pulled down his jeans and underwear to his ankles, "Now what."

Dick sat there smirking at him and waited, Dean finally gave in and squeezed some in his hands and worked the slick gel over himself, "I'm closing my eyes because looking at you is a boner killer."

"Whatever you need to do Dean, just tell me who you're thinking about when you do it…is it Sam?" Dean squeezed his eyes shut tight and made a face, "Gross no, my ten year old brother? I'm not you pervert, someone else."

Dean tried to relax and thought of Castiel, the taste of his lips, tongue, the swell of his ass in the sweatpants that were a size too big and slipped down his slender hips and the gentle noises he made when Dean licked him and probed briefly.

Sam's sweet face flashed briefly and Deans mind wandered to his warm, safe body always holding his every night then he pushed the thoughts away and listened to Castiels voice in his mind instead.

Dean felt himself there listening to not the words he said but the deep, soft sound of his voice when Castiel was comforting and whispering loving words in his ear.

Dean trembled at the memories and let out a low moan for Castiel and somewhere deep in his mind Sam, not Dick Roman as he touched himself pretending it was the strong slender fingers of the strange, awkward neighbor with the beautiful blue orbs. Dean finished quickly and kept his eyes closed so he wouldn't have to see his benefactor watching.

Dean felt a tongue cleaning him then Dick's voice telling him to pull his pants up because they were there.

He opened his eyes and Dick was putting on his leather gloves after wiping his mouth, "You taste very good today Dean, are you ready for a day in my world?"

Dean closed his pants and shot back, "It can't be any worse than a night in your world."

TBC


	16. Tainted With Blood

Sam caught the bus home by himself, a text from Dean let him know that Dick Roman won his brother again over Sam.

Sam went home and immediately took a shower. When he got out he stood in front of the steamed mirror and wiped a path with his towel then Sam studied himself.

Sam wondered if he would ever be handsome like Dean, if he would ever be brave enough to push the mop of hair off his face and show the world his features and feel comfortable in his own body like Dean. People told Sam he was cute but as he learned that only got you so far.

He thought his brother was about the most beautiful person in the world inside and out, Dean never complimented him calling Sam a little nerd, dork, bitch, knocked his hygiene and teased him constantly.

Other times Sam caught Dean watching him move, staring at his face then quickly looking away. Sometimes Sam would wake up and his brother would be sitting there watching him sleep. Those times he was gentle with Sam and stroked his hair until Sam fell asleep again.

Dean's compliments extended to Sam's intelligence, his cooking even thought it was awful Dean would say it was great, when Sam drew a picture Dean acted like Sam had done a masterpiece and Dean always defended him no matter what.

Everything with Dean was a bag of mixed signals adding to the boy's confusion about his own feelings towards his brother.

Sam ran his fingers over his chest and stomach feeling inadequate in so many ways. He wondered if he would be enticing or smart enough to figure out a way to save his brother.

Sam shut off the light and heard a knock at the door, he put on Johns robe that almost touched the floor on him and asked who it was, "Sam its Castiel, I thought we could make supper with Dean."

Sam opened the door and smiled up at him, "Dean should be back soon." The angels face fell, "He is with him?" Sam's expression after that gave him the answer he needed.

…

Dean got out of the limo and followed Dick Roman and Henry the body guard into the massive building, he looked around the glass atrium as they passed a large semi circle desk where several people greeted them but Dick swept by to elevator where he swiped a card and the three of them went up so many floors Dean lost count.

"I have to get back before Sam gets out of school, I said I wasn't coming here you know. I'm supposed to be in school."

Dick turned and decided to acknowledge him, "Oh were you talking?"

"Yeah."

"Well shut up."

Dean stood there quietly wondering if he could twist the man's neck hard enough to kill him like John had taught Dean to do. He never got to try the move and hoped he would never have to do it but now it seemed like a prudent thing to do. The body guard eyed Dean and he pushed the thoughts out of his head.

They got off and went to a huge boardroom where well dressed men sat there around the massive table. They all had briefcases and talked quietly among themselves but the odd thing Dean noted was the expression they all shared.

Finally Dean put his finger on it, the look was shame, not shame for what they did but the shame of being foolish enough to get caught. There wasn't a single scrap of morality between them.

Dick stood at the head of the table with his hands folded in front of him smiling at the men, he snapped his fingers and two gentleman sat on either side of their employer.

Dick motioned for one of the men to move down and he patted the chair next to him, "Dean you sit here."

Dean sat and examined the men in the room closer, he figured there had to be twenty five and some he recognized from the nightmarish party he attended.

"Gentleman I hope you all enjoyed my party and all that pretty flesh I laid out for your pleasure."

One of them snapped, "What the hell is this Roman, blackmail?"

Dick looked at him with false shock, "Blackmail is a strong and ugly word, I prefer payment for services rendered. You enjoyed my products and now it's time to give me my due."

Another was almost in tears, "You destroyed me…you get everything!"

"Mister Daniels I only destroy you if you don't sign over your company. Don't be a child it's not your only asset. In fifteen years or so you will be right back up there so chin up."

One of the men flanking Dick slid over a large, glossy photo, Dick held it up, "Mister Daniels you seem to be having such a good time." It was a photo of the man with a party favor sitting on top of him.

Dick whispered to Dean, "Watch them all pay for their sins now Dean." Dean whispered back, "When do you pay for yours?"

….

Hours ticked by as the two lawyers for Dick Roman worked with each man as they signed over companies, shares, one island and several franchises, there were two mansions, a race track and a casino. Very powerful men, each one a puppet master in his own right.

Dean went to the leather sofa and fell asleep and didn't wake up until the body guard shook him awake, "Mister Roman said to bring you home." Dean looked around and the room was empty, it was dark outside and the snow was falling. "Sam!"

Dean called him and Sam answered his voice full of worry, "Dean where are you?"

"I'm so sorry baby boy I'll be right there and explain, are you alone, is Cas there?"

"Yeah Dean, Cas is helping me make chicken, he's showing me how to.."

Dean saw Henry waiting, "I gotta go be there soon."

Dean stopped at the liquor display and grabbed two bottles, one a Heritage cognac and Royal Salute. Both incredibly expensive but Dean took them not only to drink but for the attractive bottles.

Henry watched him and shook his head, "You will be in a world of hurt, Mister Roman values his fine liquor."

That got Dean even angrier than usual, he went in search of a bag and found an AV cart instead, he went in the storage cabinet in Dick Romans office and loaded up one bottle of each ending up with eight bottles of the most expensive alcohol Dick Roman owned. For good measure Dean took the crystal glassware and decanters.

Henry sighed and held the elevator for him as he rolled it all in, "You are either brave or stupid."

Dean stared straight ahead, "I'm both, tell him I said to fuck off if he bitches about it Henry…tell him he can paddle my ass next time."

"Mister Roman will do much more than that."

….

Henry helped carry the bottles and glassware up and set it outside the apartment door, "Good night you little fool, everything you take from him… money, booze, sex and power…it's all tainted with blood."

"I'm tainted with blood already Henry, what's a little more added to it?"

….

Sam was busy frying chicken with Cas when Dean hurried into their apartment, "Look Dean we made supper for you, Cas brought everything over and I can do it myself now."

Dean unloaded all the booze and glassware setting the bottles down the counter like a row of dark trophies. He opened the Macallan Fine and Rare 1926, almost a forty thousand dollar bottle, Dean drank deeply then started coughing.

He felt dirty and tired, he was pulled out of school, forced to masturbate in the limo and watch filthy, vile men forced to sign off their assets to some else that was as filthy and vile.

"Do you guys mind if I shower?"

Sam moved around like a hummingbird draining chicken and breading more, "Sure we can eat when you're done." After Dean shut the door Castiel looked down at Sam curiously, "No questions for him?"

Sam concentrated on the task at hand, "No…it was something bad and he's home now, I can't help him out there but I can make Dean feel good when he comes home." The angel reached out and patted his head, "You are a good man Sam Winchester."

"So are you Cas."

….

Christmas Eve

Cas sat on the queen size bed that dominated the tiny apartment and handed each of the boys a small box. "Go on open them."

They both pulled out silver talismans that someday would be the matching tattoos the brothers would get later in life to ward off possession. Sam put his on, "Cas it's the best thanks!"

The angel lowered his eyes, "I'm glad you're pleased." Dean slipped his on and it hung just below the pendent Sam had given him, the one Sam was saving for John but never got to give to his father.

Dean wanted to hug Cas but sat there grinning instead, he touched his hand briefly, "Thanks its awesome."

Sam hung over the side of the bed and pulled out a bag handing it to Castiel, "Here it's for you."

His blue eyes opened wide, it was the first gift he had ever received, Cas stuck his hand inside and pulled out two hot mitts. "Oh thank you Sam…what are they?"

"Hot mitts because you don't use yours sometimes and I don't want you to burn yourself."

"They are the nicest thing anyone has ever given me, I'll cherish them forever."

Sam rolled his eyes and flopped down next to him examining the pendant, "Geez it's just a pair of hot mitts."

Dean poked the angel in the ribs and tickled him a little, "Don't worry Cas I got you a frame for them so they don't get dirty."

The angel sat there staring down at the mitts, "Alright then." He looked at both of them smirking at him, "Wait, you are having a joke at my expense right?"

The boys started to laugh leaving the angel more confused.

…..

After Sam passed out from too much food and excitement, Castiel got up to leave and Dean followed him back to the apartment. They sat on the couch and watched the snow come down as the dim moonlight worked its way through the dirty glass.

Dean worked his fingers with the angels, "I have a present for you Cas."

"Dean your friendship is my present, that and the wonderful hot mitts."

"Cas can I tell you something and you won't tell Sam or anyone?"

"Yes Dean."

"Dick Roman makes me do stuff all the time, things I hate but that's how I make money and help Sam. There are some things I won't do though." Dean was quiet for a long time just sitting there holding Castiels hand.

"Do you want to tell me Dean? I'll listen and not judge you."

"Ok well I won't let him or anyone have sex with me, you know… put it in me and I won't do it to him or anyone else. I'm afraid someday I'll go there and he's gonna break his rule."

"What rule?"

"That I have to be broken down and beg for it because I need something bad enough. That's what he does you know Cas."

Castiel turned to Dean then and pleaded, "Just ask for my help Dean please."

Dean felt pressured again and put up defenses, "No I just needed to tell someone and thought I could trust you. I don't want you involved or hurt, can't you just listen? That's all I need is someone to hear me."

"Very well if that's all you need from me right now."

Dean got up and went to the little bed stripping his clothes off and slipping under the covers, he was thrilled when the angel got up and walked over dropping his clothing along the way and joined him. The apartment was freezing but the angel didn't seem to notice.

Dean was trembling as the bed was next to the drafty window, he curled against him and buried his face in the crook of the angels arms. "What are you Cas…can you tell me? Even if you're a monster you have to be a good one. I promise I won't hurt you."

"If I tell you will it make a difference Dean? I love you and that is enough, you still love me?"

"Sure, yeah of course. You don't have to tell me if you're gonna get in trouble. I know, how about if I guess and if I'm right you have to tell me."

"Alright Dean but you…"

"Angel…you're an angel right?"

"Yes."

Dean crawled on top of him and placed sloppy, wet kisses over his face, "I have a Christmas angel then, I'm lucky."

"You're not scared of me? I don't understand how you accept this as if it were normal."

Dean tried a nipple next sucking the tiny nub and tugging then moved to the other, he raised his head and stared at the blue eyes that started to glow as Castiel could now be himself with Dean, "Cas there is no such thing as normal now relax and let me give you the present."

Dean worked a trail down his chest and stomach then sucked a bruise in the hollow of his hip, "Cas can I have sex with you?"

The blue eyes flickered open and stared up at him, "Isn't this sex?"

"No I mean really have it…you know, I wonder how it would feel if I was inside you."

Gabriel's words echoed once again in his head and he feared any more would cause them to take him away, "I want you to but I can't, they will take me away from you Dean and to me it's not worth the price."

Dean closed his eyes and pushed against him working their bodies together until they were both satisfied but not going any further, both remained virgins.

…

Dean paid Januarys rent from the Christmas money and was happy when Dick Roman was out of the country for a month on business; his ominous text said he would be home in time for Dean's birthday but Dean didn't bother to answer.

He was almost feeling normal again, Deans version of normal. Taking care of Sam, going to school and dinners with Cas. They hadn't done anything since Christmas Eve with both backing off from something Castiel couldn't give him.

When January twenty fourth rolled around Dean was over the moon, he was fifteen now and a year away from escaping all the garbage the world dumped on him, he got up to Sam making him eggs and bacon. The eggs were broken, the bacon and toast were burnt but Dean ate it anyway with a smile on his face.

"Sammy I figure after I turn sixteen we finish out the school year then I get baby out of storage and we take off on the open road. I'll start saving everything I get from Dick except the bare necessities and we can use it as seed money. I'll get a real job or we can hunt and live off the land…hell I don't know but I gotta get out of here."

Sam was excited at the prospect of something new, "That would be great Dean I want that. I'll be twelve and I can help more, I can pick locks really well I've been practicing. You can start teaching me how to shoot and it's just you and me right?"

Castiel crossed Deans mind but he pushed the thought out, "You and me Sammy just the Winchesters forever."

Dean's phone vibrated and it was Dick Roman, "Yeah?"

"Hey how is my very favorite fifteen year old doing today?"

"Good."

"I'm keeping you for the weekend and I have all sorts of fun things in store for my sweet birthday boy, I didn't have sex the entire time I was in that backwater country even though there were treats aplenty…I was saving it up for you and all I could dream about was that pretty little ass of yours."

Dean felt sick to his stomach, "You know I'm saving it for someone special."

"Rent is due soon right? How is the food holding out for you Dean…getting low I bet."

"Yeah."

"Good then I'll see you soon…don't ever think of running from me Dean, I'll find you and I'll kill Sam. I'd let you live just so you can suffer."

Dean whispered, "I hate you…how did you know?"

"I know everything Dean, have a good night."

Dean hung up and wondered if he could stave off Dick Romans desire for an entire year until he could escape or if leaving him would ever be possible.

Sam buttered Dean a piece of toast and it crumbled into charcoal dust, "Sorry my cooking isn't so good. Dean can we go see dad's car? I want to get his stuff out and bring it back, you said Cas would rent us a vehicle and come to help."

"Yeah Sam let's do that really soon, I'll take to him about it."

Sam wanted to get his hands on anything John Winchester had left because Sam knew with the right things a hero could vanquish any monster. The fortune cookie had told him so.

TBC


	17. Unbroken Circle

Dick barged into the apartment past Sam with a body guard carrying a massive basket of fruit and set in on the tiny table, "There you go Sam so you don't get rickets or scurvy."

Sam sat on the bed giving Dick Roman what Dean liked to call his bitch face. "Why are you such an asshole?"

Dick pulled off his leather gloves and looked around, "I don't know Sam why are you such a sniveling little bitch…what do you say Sam you want to be my bitch? Be a nice tender little bottom, maybe I'll let Dean finally get a crack at that cherry of yours; he wants it more than I do."

Sam wasn't totally sure what most of that meant but he knew it was something nasty, "Gross I wouldn't be your anything, I think your ugly inside and out." Dick balled up his fist and then relaxed it, "Where is Dean?"

Sam started reading a comic book, "None of your business, you're so smart you figure it out."

Dick gestured for the body guard to stand outside, Dick grabbed the comic book away and straddle Sam on the bed bending down until they were face to face, "Listen to me you little piece of meat, you better start respecting me." Sam tried to bite him and got a slap for his efforts giving him a nose bleed.

"You know what your brother does for all that money?"

"Boss the kid is coming."

Dick got off and Sam wiped the blood on his sleeve, he ran to the bathroom and slammed the door, Dick knocked, "Say one word and Dean pays for your big mouth."

Dean walked in and looked around, "Where's Sam?"

Sam was sitting with his back against the door, "I'm in the bathroom Dean just go."

Dean touched the door gingerly, his voice soft, "Sam I'll be back tomorrow ok? I love you...are you alright in there?"

"Yeah Dean l love you don't worry Cas is here."

He walked out and the body guard grabbed his arm dragging him down the hall and around the corner, Dick followed then stopped when he heard a growl, Castiel was standing there with shadows behind him stretching and filling the space rapidly.

Dick gave him his big, white sharp smile, "So you're my boy's distraction, what are you a demon or a monster?"

A light passed through Castiels eyes and Dick snapped his fingers, "Angel, well good to know, I will see you later…count on it."

When he got to the end of hall Castiel shouted, "I know what you are." The hall turned almost black and Dick Roman froze looking around at the wings, "Angel if you could have done something you would have done it already. Impotent useless nothing that's what you are."

Castiel felt chained by his assignment and its limitations, "All Dean needs to do is ask for help."

Dick gave him a smirk, "Pride goeth before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall….isn't that something you have in that book of fairytales?"

Castiel moved closer, his eyes burning brightly in the dark hall, "Remember this monster, when a man has gotten to the height of his riches and is swelling with pride and vanity he is on the precipice of ruin, and his fall is immediate…I will be there to help you fall." A knife dropped from his sleeve and he took a step closer.

Dick held out his arms, "Go for it, come get some you blue eyed bitch I'll pluck out those pretty orbs of yours and save them for a snack then keep you around for some real fun. I actually know a lot of men that would pay to fuck a blind angel with a nice vessel."

Dean came back to see what was happened and saw the angel's eyes in the dark, he stopped dead and felt his heart racing.

Dick Roman seemed even harder, colder. Dean watched as a tongue lashed out passing over his face then retracted. Dean started to back away from them both and when the angel spotted him the darkness faded.

Dean ran down the stairs, out the door and slipped, it knocked the wind out of him and he struggled back up as the body guard tried to help. He jerked away, "Don't touch me!"

Dean ran until his lungs were going to burst from the cold, he went into the diner and took a booth out of sight.

…..

Dick Roman got in the limo and barked at the body guard, "Find him I have birthday plans for Dean."

…

Loretta handed Dean a menu, "So where is your shadow today, my cutie pie Sam?" Dean looked up at her with haunted eyes, she saw his hands shaking and she took the menu back, "Don't worry baby doll I'll just bring you something."

Loretta came back with hot chocolate and a grilled cheese, she turned to leave and Dean grabbed her wrist, "Men will be looking for me and if they come in here don't tell them I'm here."

She looked around and sat with him, "What's wrong, who's after you?" Dick Roman walked in and spotted Dean.

Dean dropped his head, "Just go…never mind its fine." Dean got up and walked out the door with him.

…

"Why did you run, you had to know what Castiel was."

"It wasn't just that it was you…you're a goddamn monster."

"Well Dean lets agree to not talk about that."

They sat in silence until Dick pulled out a ring box and handed it to him, "Happy Birthday Dean." Dean opened the box and there was a thick platinum band with a recessed diamond the size of a dime.

He handed it back, "I can't wear this, it looks like some kind of male gigolo wedding band."

"Put it on, it's yours and it's not a wedding band. Why in the world would that ever cross your mind?"

Dean slipped it on, "Yeah I'm just a piece of meat…a whore right?"

"Something like that but a little more special Dean, I don't have feelings for anyone ever. Emotions are messy and a human weakness I don't imbibe in so don't worry."

"Good because I hate you."

"I know Dean your hopelessly in love with Sam, I would pay a million to watch the two of you together, I could sell tickets."

"You're fucking gross you know that? Sammy is ten and…just shut up. It won't happen anyway. I have morals and wouldn't ever do that to him even if he was grown up."

"Sure Dean, take it out on the angel then right? Sammy substitute. Castiel is like a child…now who is the monster?"

Dean was ready to punch Dick with his big, new diamond, "For someone that likes to play puppet master and worry about his fucking big ass companies and travel around the world you sure the hell are focused on me you loser."

Dick ignored him and pointed, "Oh look we're here."

….

They entered the private club full of powerful men and women surrounded by beautiful people of various ages. There was a band playing on stage and people were dancing in place grinding slowly. It was nothing like the disgusting party Dean had been to.

This was a legitimate club where the powerful went to relax, drink, listen to music and pick up a tasty treat but all above board.

They sat down and Dick ordered them drinks, Dean got a beer and Dick had scotch and soda. "I wanted to dance with you, jazz, blues and torch songs are sexy, sensual if they play the right music. It's one thing I give a nod to, that humans can create music otherwise you're all useless really."

Dean had to laugh, "You dance? Doubtful anything you do would be considered dancing."

Dick got up and nodded to the woman on stage, "Lover Man" started to play. Dick grabbed Dean tight and the boy closed his eyes pretending it was Castiel. The lyrics reminded him of his awkward, hidden feelings for the man or angel. Dean could never decide how to view him anymore.

He thought of Sam but an older version just the two of them together then Castiel entered his mind once again. Dean was confused and gave up resting his head on Dick Romans shoulder knowing it was the only option open at the moment.

…

Winter passed quickly enough, Dean did his best to keep Dick at bay with the tease of his total breakdown. He saw the monster once a month but sometimes Dick just showed up or sent gifts.

Dean thought of pawning the ring but held onto it until he was ready to escape with Sam. Dean encouraged the gifts now especially jewelry because that would be the easiest to sell.

He went to the angel in the dead of night to feel something real, a grown man that wouldn't hurt Dean. Someone that loved him and accepted what he was without judgment.

Sam clung to him tight always keeping an eye out for Dean leaving. Dean still went to the laundry room to mourn his life enjoying the solitude to cry without pity or scorn.

Dean hit things, if he was lucky it was an unfortunate bag of laundry but if there wasn't something soft then hard would do just fine. He began to take pills to sleep and chase away the nightmares but he always woke up tired.

Sam would find him sometimes in what he called the white room sleeping on the folding table, head on some towels groaning in his sleep. Sam would bring him back and put Dean to bed.

All the cycles repeated over and over with no end in sight.

…..

Spring came and it was Sam's birthday. It gave them both a reprieve from their everyday lives; Sam was eleven and that much closer to being independent.

Dean managed to get himself up and make Sam breakfast, May second the special day that changed Deans life forever. The day Sam was born and he would never be alone again.

Sam pretended he was asleep but Dean knew better, pancakes could wake the deepest of sleepers and Sam was no exception. Dean pushed his foot against Sam's leg, "Get up lazy ass, just because you're old now doesn't mean you can sleep in."

Sam rolled over and his eyes popped open, "Pancakes!"

Dean chuckled, "Doesn't take much to excite you does it Sammy?"

They devoured every single bite, "So tell me what you really want to do today baby boy."

"I want to go see the Impala, I want all of dads stuff and I want a driving lesson."

Dean wondered how he would manage it all, "Ok well hang on."

He went to see Castiel who was still playing the part of a crypto zoologist and wearing glasses, Dean smiled when he saw him sitting there looking nerdy and befuddled.

"You look cute in glasses Cas…actually super cute."

Castiel frowned, "I am supposed to look smart."

Dean sat next to him and stole a kiss, "Babe today is Sammy's birthday and I need you to rent us a car and come with us ok?"

Castiel didn't bother to ask why and readily agreed.

….

"I need a car."

The woman behind the rental counter looked over the man, the teenager and boy, "Ok well what kind, do you have a preference?"

Castiel slid the business card over to her with the address of the hunter storing the Impala, "One that will take us here."

She rolled her eyes and then plastered on a smile, "Ok then I need proof of insurance and your license, credit card and you need to fill this form out."

Castiel touched her forehead, "You talk too much, I need a car."

She handed him a set of keys and they left.

…..

Several hours on the road they spotted Ricks storage and buzzed to be let in, a tall, heavy set man came to the gate and eyed the car suspiciously. Dean got out and showed him Rick's card explaining the situation with the Impala. The man they later found out was Little John, he didn't seem to care much for their tale of woe and just did his job. He unlocked the storage unit that Rick kept the Impala in then gave Dean a copy of the key.

Walking in and seeing the familiar black car made Dean choke up. Sam ran over so he could touch the dusty black paint and get to know the car all over again. "Dean could we drive her?

"Hang on Sam I'll see if she's even been run all this time." Dean talked to Little John, Dean was pleased that Rick was true to his word and made sure someone kept her maintained.

"Got your license kid?"

Dean knew there was no way to lie to the man, he could see right through him, "No I don't, can't I just drive her around with Sam? He wants to learn and we can keep it here in the salvage yard."

"No way kid, what about Mister Personality standing over there?" Dean grinned, "Yeah he could go with Sam, I can sit in the back."

….

Dick Roman was in a good mood, he just got back from a successful trip the night before, completed a meeting with board members verbally beating them into submission and now Dick had a handsome young assistant bent over his desk.

Dick banged the assistant hard against the mahogany, mounting the twentysomething like a bitch then finished by yanking his head back by the thick head of hair and calling him a useless whore then insulted his hygiene.

Dick came hard and pulled out panting, he slapped the firm rear, "Ok get up and clean yourself then make me some fresh coffee."

The young man stood up shaky on his feet, he pulled up his boxers and pants, he was angry and felt like stabbing his boss in the eye with the pen he stared at while he was being violated on Dick Romans desk but instead he nodded and went to do exactly as the man said.

Dick took out an anti bacterial wipes and cleaned up then sat down and waited for his coffee, when the assistant finally came with a fresh cup Dick grabbed his wrist, "Your good, nice and compliant I like that but don't get boring."

The assistant hurried out of the room getting distance between himself and that strange, brutal man he worked for.

Dick Romans good mood turned when he thought about letting a let a fifteen year old get under his borrowed skin but Dean Winchester was a bad habit the monster couldn't break.

The sex with the assistant only made him want the tough, proud and cocky boy even more because there hadn't been another that came close to living up to the Winchester boy's beauty and defiant personality.

Dick found himself drinking more, he found it difficult not having what he really wanted. That would have to change soon or Dean would end up destroying Dick Romans carefully built life.

TBC


	18. Isle Of Broken Dreams

Dick flew to his new island to see the prize that was signed over to him. He stood in front of the huge home built there. There was staff housing and the staff now worked for Dick Roman.

He had to confess he loved the warm breeze, palms and dense forest. The water was the biggest bonus for Dick Roman, he felt at home there. The creature was in his element. It would be a perfect place for Dean to live with him and he could conduct business from there easily.

Dick figured Sam could fend for himself because he was eleven but he was willing to take Sam on certain conditions. Dick in fact sat down on the chaise and started a list of them.

Sam would need to submit to sex

The brothers must have threesomes with Dick Roman

Dean was his and not Sam's

He had many other conditions but those were his top three. He toured the home with Henry; it was nowhere near the size of his mansion and grounds at his main home but it was comfortable enough.

They explored and Henry took notes for his employer, there was no rumpus room as Dick Roman like to call it. A place for pain and pleasure, if Dean was going to live there that was a necessity.

"Henry I like it here…do you think Dean will like it?"

Henry sometimes felt brave enough to speak out, "Would it matter if he did sir? If Dean Winchester would hate it here would you bring him home?"

Dick Romans jaw tightened, "No Henry…you have a smart mouth today, why don't you get on your knees and put it to good use?"

Henry put down the notebook, dropped immediately to his knees and opened the fly on his employers pants pulling out the long, hard cock he knew so well. He flicked and swirled quickly catching the first bead of come then sunk to the base and back doing everything perfectly.

Dick closed his eyes and sighed, "Henry it's too bad you're already twenty five, I liked that awkward twelve year old I bought at auction so many years ago. I don't think I'll tire of Dean like I did you…but you know I value you right Henry?"

Henry kept going and secretly hoped Dean wouldn't end up like him, trapped forever with no way out but to die. He pictured Dean forced to live on that island or at least until he was brave enough to kill himself. Henry was never that brave.

….

Sam hopped in and stretched to get a good view, he buckled up and Dean sat in the front figuring as long as Cas was in the car Little John wouldn't have a heart attack.

The angel looked worried and leaned over the seat, "Dean is this safe?" Dean shrugged, "Hey about as safe as you driving."

Sam already knew the basics from watching his dad and Dean drive but it had never been put into practice. "Remember Sam this is a lot of car so don't…"

Sam floored it and slammed on the brakes before he hit the fence, Sam put it in park and tried to catch his breath, "Sorry Dean what were you going to say?"

"Don't floor it…the uh…the car is powerful, it's not a pussy car."

"Dean you always said dad's car was a pussy magnet."

They went that way for almost two hours until Sam got the hang of it, Dean wanted Sam to learn, to know how to fend for himself in case anything would ever happen to him.

Sam thought it was because when they left in a year he could share the driving with Dean.

….

They parked her back in storage and they went over it with a fine tooth comb bringing back the boxes and the weapons. Sam took the lucky rabbits foot hanging from the mirror and slipped it in his pocket.

The boys sat there in the front seat together while Castiel sat in the back of the rental car giving them time alone.

"I really miss dad…Sammy he would have been a better teacher than me."

"No Dean you're the one that's supposed to teach me to be a hunter, dad just gave me some basics but I know what you mean. I miss him Dean, I have dreams about dad…you got more time with him so you're lucky."

Sam's fingers crept over and twined with his brothers, "Dean let's just get our stuff and leave…sell all that crap Dick gave you and go."

"Sorry Sammy you gotta hang in there until your next birthday, I want you to get a full year in and I can get my license then we sell all that stupid jewelry and crap. All we need is your lap top. We can bring Cas and he can pretend to be dad maybe…I don't know where he's gonna be either."

Sam took advantage of them being alone and kissed Dean on the cheek, "If we stick together everything is gonna work out right?"

"Sure Sam of course."

….

They got back late that night and drove the rental back, unloaded John's things and dropped the rental off catching a bus back home.

The boys were dead tired but went over to Castiels apartment and had birthday cake for Sam. Afterward Dean put a sleepy Sam to bed and sat with him until he fell asleep. He considered it a good day, Sam got in some driving and they got back all of Johns things.

It was a closure in a way for them both putting the reality of their dad's death front and center and allowing them time to work it out together sitting in what was their home for much of their lives.

…..

Dean went to Castiel and got in bed next to him, "I just need you to hold me awhile ok?"

Castiel wrapped him in his arms feeling the need for the closeness as well, he let Dean talk like he always did letting the young man talk about his hopes and dreams but never once did he ask for the angels help.

"Dean pride can be a detriment, don't you want someone to help you…me?"

"Cas I have it figured out, one more year Sammy and I cash out all that crap Dick gave me, I get my license all nice and legal and we throw you in the back and you can do the dad thing. I get Sam in school, we get a little cheap place the three of us and I work…hell I don't need more school after that. I want to hunt and help people like dad taught me. I want a lot of things…"

His voice trailed off as he stared out the window with the angel spooned behind him.

"Dean you haven't done certain things with Dick Roman I know but are you still pure?"

Dean let out a bitter laugh, "As pure as you can be with the shit I've seen and done but if you're talking about if I've gotten screwed then the answer is no I have not…I haven't done it to anyone either and its gonna stay that way."

The angel relaxed, "Good, stay pure."

Dean rolled over and faced him, "I told you I'm saving myself, it's stupid…what guy my age does that right? It's funny before dad died I was going gangbusters to fuck someone and I thought about getting fucked. I bragged like I was this master lover but I was a liar. I wish now it is like it was back then."

Castiel kissed his cheek, "You are still good Dean, no matter what happens no one can take away your pure heart. Could you and Sam move in with me until you are sixteen then you wouldn't have to see him."

"No we need money and I have it worked out so just drop it."

Castiel didn't say anything and pretended he was sleeping, Dean got on top of him and pushed his legs open, "If I wanted to fuck you I could right…you could stop me easy but you would let me."

The blue eyes opened and locked onto Deans, "I could stop you but I won't hurt you Dean, if you think you want to make me submit I'll do it to make you happy."

Dean wet his finger and pushed roughly inside of Castiel searching for this mysterious prostate he heard of then curled his finger and felt it, the angel squeezed his eyes shut and let out a small sound of pleasure.

"Good I found it...does it feel nice?"

The blue eyes snapped open and his hips shifted, "Yes."

Dean slid over and over it then forced another finger inside as Castiel cried out, when Dean eagerly pushed in a third the angel tried to back off, "Dean it hurts now."

Dean's eyes were lust blown, "You don't feel pain."

A tear slid down his cheek, "I do feel pain but I can heal myself."

Dean pulled out his fingers and there was blood, he was too hard and rough on Castiel, he looked at his hand and down at the angel. The blue eyes were closed and Dean assumed he was healing.

He went to wash his hands and came back crawling under the covers and stroking his hair like a pet, "I'm sorry I never did that before and I thought you'd like it. I don't know what's wrong with me anymore…I felt like I wanted to hurt you a little."

"Dean I'm healed, if you still want to try I would let you have me now."

Dean pulled the angel to him, "No I might hurt you again, maybe we can try sometime when I don't feel so angry." Dean went down on him bringing the angel to a gentle orgasm to make up for the pain then kissed him and went back to Sam.

…..

Summer passed slowly, the heat index reaching all time highs and the groan of the fan in the window working constantly. That summer Dean pushed Sam hard to learn the ways of hunting the best he knew how. Anything John knew now Sam knew it to and he made him practice.

Sam lost count how many times he took apart and put back together weapons with Dean, they ran imaginary drills and submission holds, how to handle a knife properly and pick locks. Occasionally the angel rented them a car and they practiced driving for hours out at the old salvage yard and storage. Dean avoided Rick and any questions that might come up.

He went to see Dick Roman and tried to save money but it was as if the man knew any extra might go toward escaping and Dick couldn't let Dean go.

Dean started participating in Dicks sexual twists holding down the man's young lovers and watching him hurt them. Dean hated himself for it but it kept Dick at bay from raping Dean and as long as Dean was there the boys didn't come to an untimely end.

After those sessions he would take the pills offered when he got home to take away the dark thoughts in his head.

Dean would lay there with Sam in the dark and stroke his hair feeling normal only with his brother. There were times Dean watched him sleep and wanted to kiss him. One night he broke down and ghosted his lips over his brothers running a tongue along the salty skin of his tender neck.

Sam's hazel eyes fluttered open, "Dee what is that?"

Dean was hard and rolled away from him, "Nothing go back to sleep Sam." He waited for the even breathing again and left not trusting himself. He went to Castiel and got on top forcing his legs open.

Dean bent down and kissed him, "You're so easy…pliable and weak Cas."

"I'm not weak I just love you but I suppose it makes me weak in a way Dean."

Dean licked his neck pretending it was Sam, "Do you have any lubricant?"

"What would it be Dean, I don't think I have anything like that."

Dean got up and looked around settling on some lotion and kneeled between the angel's legs squirting it on his hand and rubbing over the fresh, tight entrance then sliding in a finger. Dean began to stroke while the other hand slicked the angels cock working quickly to get him off.

Castiel had a hair trigger and came easily not learning how to hold back and pace himself. Dean rubbed more lotion between his own legs and forced his erection inside the angel as far as it would go.

Dean cried out from the tight pleasure of the clean velvet sheath, He braced himself staring down into the big blue eyes lust blown and edged with pain as Dean fucked hard and quick overly excited by the incredible feeling and the new experience.

He grunted and sweat dripped off him onto the man below as he tried different angles and paces then moaned, "Cas…love you." Dean finished jerking inside the body. The angel arched in pleasure yelling his love for Dean and when it was over they laid together passion sated.

….

Fall arrived quick enough, the boys started school and Dean went for the most part passing by the skin of his teeth.

Deans burden were the sexual feelings for his little brother that he transferred to the angel. Several times a week he would kiss Sam then run to finish down the hall inside of Castiel.

Dean felt the guilt over using the being that loved him and even though he loved him as well Dean knew everything about the situation was wrong. His anger transferred to his time with Dick Roman, denying the one thing the man wanted because Dean could and helping him carry out things that a year ago he never would have dreamed of.

Dean watched boys weep, men fall to their knees and empires crumble right at the monsters side and he became jaded, not reacting as much to those situations.

…

Dean bit the angel hard drawing blood because he could, because Castiel could heal. He shuddered and finished leaving the vessel abused and damaged then collapsed on top of him quickly falling asleep.

Castiel lay there in the dark feeling alone and worthless, a failure at every turn, a being with power not allowed to use it. Loving someone he shouldn't and letting the boy hurt him for fear of losing Dean.

He heard the voice of Gabriel in the dark, "Take the Winchesters and run brother they are coming for you." Then the voice was gone.

Castiel moved Dean off him and sat up, eyes darting around the room then he saw them. Three angels in black suits, they rushed him and the chains came binding him. They vanished with Castiel leaving Dean alone in a dreamless sleep.

TBC


	19. All Torn Asunder

Dean looked around and there was no sign of Castiel, no note from him. His trench was still there and all of his meager belongings. Dean hurried down to the laundry room and then the basement storage; next he went to the apartment and woke up a confused Sam.

"Cas is gone, did he come here or say anything?" Sam rubbed his eyes and looked around, "Where were you…Dean I don't know anything." Dean sat down next to Sam to think, he had no idea where the angel to could be.

Sam rested his head in his brother's lap and then sat up wrinkling his nose, "You stink like something."

Dean realized he hadn't showered at all after sex with Castiel, "Sorry Sam I'm all sweaty." Dean quickly went to the bathroom and scrubbed himself clean.

When he got out Sam was sitting there sadly, "Dick called, he wants to talk to you. Dean don't leave me, if Cas isn't here I don't want to be alone."

"I'm sorry Sammy but the rent is due and November is right around the corner."

Sam wrapped a blanket around himself and laid back down, "Tell me the truth, I saw a bottle of pills again…you still take them and I said not to. What do you do with Dick…sex right?"

"Sam I never let him have sex with me I promise, not real sex."

Sam fished a booklet out of his backpack, "We're taking sex education and I'm not dumb, I know you do stuff. Even if he doesn't put his thing in you Dean you can get sick from him."

Dean picked up the pamphlet and flipped through it, Sam had highlighted the parts about oral sex, HIV, herpes and other sexually transmitted diseases. "See Dean if you swallow his semen you can get sick."

Dean felt like an idiot, he never once thought about it or the consequences of his actions then he worried about Castiel, the kisses he shared with Sam and everything in between. "Sammy I kissed you."

"Dean that doesn't count I don't think but I'll ask my teacher but Cas should check you or we could go to that free clinic."

Sam was being the level headed one at eleven and Dean had gambled with his life but at that point it had very little meaning to him.

Dean saw himself as a machine to keep Sam alive and that was all. He could hardly look at his reflection some days. If it wasn't for his brother Dean would have had little incentive to go on.

….

Dean sat in the Hummer next to Dick going where ever the man wanted him to go. "So I was wondering if you got any STDs or been tested for anything."

Dick glanced over and frowned, "Of course not I don't get sick…why are you?" Dean shrugged, "No I just…I swallowed your come and Sammy had a booklet about stuff…never mind."

"Sam is a fucking troublemaker; he should keep his mouth shut."

Dean tightened his fists feeling the rage coming again, "Sam loves me, he gets worried." Dean turned quickly with tears in his eyes, "He's the only one that cares about me besides Cas."

Dick smirked, "And how is it working out with that angel, I'm thinking of taking care of him myself. Can you imagine what a nice addition it would be to have one as a toy? I've been researching ways to bind him Dean, just think what we can do to him."

Dean lashed out but it didn't matter how hard he hit nothing affected Dick Roman, "What did you do with Cas?"

"Whatever do you mean?"

Dean groaned his answer feeling a deep, emotional pain, "He's gone and I know you did it!"

Dick was surprised, "I didn't do anything but it's a bonus for me if he's gone."

….

Castiel sat in a cell with no way out. Gabriel stared at him through the iron scroll work , "I warned you brother this was going to happen. You let that boy make love to you over and over…professing your love to someone your just supposed to keep alive? A failed assignment."

Castiel got up and rushed the door pounding it, "You told them!"

"I did no such thing I warned you to get away; you couldn't stop those human feelings could you? Pity…now you have reeducation and Cas it won't be pleasant."

Castiel wrapped his fingers around the grate, "Please I can't leave them alone."

"I can only tell them you didn't mean to be so stupid, if you live through this maybe the head office will take a little pity on you but you know how they are, total assholes and they sure hate you."

Gabriel vanished and a female appeared smiling at him through the iron, "So you're the failed captain we sent to babysit."

Castiel felt rage at the mention of his time as a garrison captain, "I never failed it was all of you that failed me…you demote me to an assignment that was doomed from the start, you know I have emotions."

Her expression hardened, "You don't even know who I am do you, I'm that forgettable to someone like you…captain."

He tried to quickly place her and then realized it was a female he worked with that had made advances but he rebuffed her.

"She laughed when the memory dawned on him, "Well being a soldier wasn't for me anyway, head office is much better. More power, you won't be seeing me again but I hope you enjoy your stay…you know all I wanted was time with you but I suppose a teenage boy is more to your liking."

"Forget about me just think of the two boys, let me go and let me be free to really help them then you can do whatever you want to me."

"No, enjoy the torture."

She vanished leaving Castiel in the darkness.

….

Henry tightened the restraints on the boy's wrists and checked his ankles, Dean was in a room that was stark white and smelled like disinfectant. There was a tray of instruments next to the table and his legs were in stirrups. The end of the line had come, he assumed he would cut up and scattered to the winds and Sam would be all alone.

Dick had been denied too long, pushed too far and Dean needed a lesson in humility.

Dick walked in and pointed to the camera, "I get to replay this over and over, it's going to be so good…award worthy I think."

Dean screamed and struggled as he felt the needle go into his arm and soon his body relaxed, "Don't kill me, Sam's alone."

"Dean I would never kill you I just need you to submit and I have all the time in the world to wait."

Dean's eyes tried to follow his movements but he felt like he was trapped underwater and everything was in slow motion, "What do you want?"

"Tell me I can play with you…fuck you, do whatever I want."

Dean mumbled, "Do it."

Dick was taken aback by the quick response, "Excuse me?"

"I don't care anymore…can't save myself, I wanted Sam…just my Sammy. Now I won't have anything to give him… wish I could die."

Dick scowled at him, "Now you ruined it."

Dean let out a slurred sort of laugh, "I'm ruined…I'm bad now…dirt…no hero."

Dick dropped the speculum back on the tray and sighed, "This isn't how I wanted it, this is no fun at all."

Dean closed his eyes, "Do it, just take me back to Sam when you're done…I submit, you win. Sam won't want me anyway."

Henry followed Dick out and they shut off the lights leaving him there in the dark.

…

Dick Roman sat there in front of the fireplace thinking; he was building anger toward the teenager and was disgusted with his own weakness. After an hour he stoked the fires inside of him enough to go back.

Dick turned on the lights and Dean was almost out just barely lucid, he didn't speak to him but instead put on rubber gloves, grabbed the gel and ran it between his legs pushing in a finger then pulling it out, more gel and more fingers after that.

The green eyes snapped open wide and a gasp came from Dean then they closed again.

"Your tight even with the shot…you didn't clean yourself, disgusting." He changed gloves and started working again. Dean felt a hard push as the slim hand was forced inside. He was too tired to scream, it stuck in his throat and died.

When the hand was removed he was grateful, a warm wetness slowly came and Dean worried he was dying.

"Don't worry Dean just a nice stretch and bleeding, see how much better it is when you don't fight me all the time? I'm claiming ownership now, you're officially my bitch."

Dick stood between his legs breathing quickly, Dean had tightened back up after he was done playing .

He forced his long cock inside and started moving slowly trying not to be pushed out, Dean felt himself crumbling inside knowing he lost it all and there was nothing left of him to give that Sam or even Castiel would ever want.

Dick started working quickly, balls slapping against Deans ass as the growls became louder, deeper as the monster edged to completion moaning at the heat and warmth of the blood slicked hole. He lurched over Dean biting his shoulder and breaking the skin as he shuddered hard and released inside of the broken body.

When it was over Dean was crying quietly as Dick watched the pink tinged moisture run out of him. He ran his fingertips over the opening entranced by the display of raw, swollen flesh.

"Dean I don't think you've ever been this beautiful to me before…I have all of these feelings for you. I'm upgrading you from whore to lover."

Dean couldn't be certain but he thought he heard a camera taking photos and then came another shot to the arm and it all went black.

….

Sam laid there in the dark praying to Castiel, "Cas I don't know how this works…I miss you and I'm alone. I know Dean is in trouble I can feel it, he needs you. Please Cas I know he didn't ask for help but doesn't it count if I ask? I need someone…I can't do it alone anymore." Sam was crying as he pleaded and when Castiel didn't show he screamed into a pillow.

After awhile he called Dean's phone but it went to voicemail again, "Please come home I need you. Are you ok…why don't you answer me?"

Sam considered calling the police but they would never believe him and he would end up taken away. Sam was afraid Dean would never find him.

…..

Castiel sat in front of the counsel as they stared all at him, he was a curiosity at the head office. The angel that fell in love with a human boy and ruined a basic assignment.

One of them started the questioning, "Is it true the boy had intercourse with you?"

He answered as he thought they would want him to, "I didn't do it to him, he made love to me. Dean loves me…I love him."

"You knew it was a mistake brother, how can we trust you to go back? Trust you to stand aside and let the road unwind for them both as it is supposed to?"

Castiel gathered up the courage to lie right to their faces, "If you allow me to go back I promise I will never sleep with the boy again…I realize loving him was a mistake. I will take whatever punishment I have coming if only you allow me to be their watcher again. I developed a bond with them both, they trust me and anyone else would be viewed with suspicion."

The counsel spoke among themselves, "We decided you will stay for reeducation Castiel and until then the Winchesters survive on their own…no replacement. That is your true punishment for breaking the rules."

He was going to protest but Gabriel shook his head no and Castiel went silent.

TBC


	20. Hurt Comfort

"Is he home safely Henry?"

"Yes Mister Roman…much safer than here."

A tight smiled passed over his lips, "There goes that mouth again Henry. Tell me has the architect arrived with the contractors to the island?"

"Yes Mister Roman, this morning."

Dick grabbed the young man by the neck and shoved him over the back of the couch, "Well just fantastic Henry!" He tugged Henrys pants open and pulled them down, "What would I do without you?"

Dick kicked the strong legs apart, centered himself and shoved his way inside the trusted bodyguard, "You need to learn your opinions are not wanted."

Henry gripped the pillow biting down stifling the sounds so as not to upset his employer.

…..

Dean didn't wake up until the next afternoon, the drugs wore off and his body was throbbing and bruised, he looked at his shoulder and saw the pattern of teeth marks there and they didn't look human.

He moved in slow motion as every muscle twitched and when he rolled on his back he felt the pain inside from the pressure. That was when Dean started to remember bits and pieces.

Henry came in, "Good you're awake, time to get up and shower. Clean yourself out you're a mess. I'll change the sheets and bring something for you to wear, are you hungry?"

It was the most the man had ever said to him but Dean noticed Dick Roman didn't seem to be around. His stomach growled and Dean couldn't remember the last time he ate, "Yeah I'm hungry."

He struggled up and shuffled to the bathroom, Dean stood under the spray hanging onto the railing then gathered the strength to wash himself but when the fingers felt over the swollen flesh the best he could do was rinse off.

….

Sam took the bus to school by himself and sat in class hardly able to listen to the teacher, at lunch he called Dean over and over but there was no answer.

….

Dean managed to dress then stood up and ate his food, it was too painful to sit down. Afterward he found his phone and checked his messages, none were from Cas but Sam had called many times each message more desperate than the last. He pressed redial and it went to voicemail.

Dean croaked, "Sammy it's me, I'm coming home."

Henry came in, "Are you ready?"

"Where is my money?"

Henry handed him a thick envelope, "Mister Roman put in extra for the inconvenience and discomfort." Dean took it with shaking hands and stuffed it in his jacket pocket.

…

Sam was at the window waiting when Dean got home and his heart beat faster when the familiar figure stepped out of the vehicle but then he watched Dean shuffle slowly. Sam could tell he was in pain as he went up the steps and entered the building.

Sam ran down to meet him stopping dead when he saw his brothers face, it was bruised and his lip was busted. When Sam tried to hug him he groaned and stepped back, "I fell Sam…got hurt pretty bad."

Sam following him spotting Dean on the stairs incase he fell and when they made it back Sam helped him off with his coat. Dean was breathing raggedly, "Sammy I'm hungry can you run to the Chinese place and get something for supper?"

It was an odd request but Sam obliged taking cash and a gun.

Dean needed to be alone, to change into sweats without his brother seeing his body. He went to the bathroom which was an exercise in torture, he cried again freely before Sam got back then took a pill and laid on his stomach waiting for his brother.

Dean felt he would never be normal again.

…..

Miss Ko smiled at Sam as he dashed in the door, it seemed the boy was always in a hurry. "Hello Sam where is your brother today?"

"Sick, he got hurt bad and he's hungry so can I get some stuff to go?"

Miss Ko frowned, "How was he hurt, does he need help?" Sam backtracked then, "It's not bad at all don't worry, dad is taking care of it."

She watched as Sam filled up the to go containers for them both then she put them in a bag and handed it to Sam, "Wait Sam let me get some soup, can you carry all of this?"

"Sure thanks…Miss Ko don't forget the fortune cookies, they are always good ones."

She turned her back and closed her empty hands then opened them and two fortune cookies were sitting there. She put them in the bag and smiled again, "I hope your fortunes come true."

…

"Dean I got all your favorites!" Sam pulled everything out and put it on the little table, "I got good fortunes for us…Miss Ko asked about you and…"

Sam heard Dean snoring softly head buried in his arms, Sam shook him gently, "Dean I got food for us."

Dean moaned and jerked in his sleep and Sam rubbed his back talking until Dean opened his bloodshot eyes, "Sammy?"

"Dean I got the food, you're hungry right?"

"Yeah sure."

Dean put on a good show of sitting up, he braced himself on one hip and tried to eat but his hands were shaking. Sam took the fork away and stabbed a piece of sweet and sour chicken holding it up and Dean ate it.

"Thanks Sam I'm all shaky tonight."

Sam would eat a bite and then he gave some to Dean until half the food was gone, he put the rest to heat up for breakfast along with the soup. He held out the fortune cookies, "You pick."

Dean pointed to one, "Open it and read it for me baby boy."

Sam broke it open and smoothed out the paper, "Be grateful for the one candle that is lit not of the surrounding darkness."

Dean was disappointed, "What does that even mean?"

"I think it means that instead of all the bad things in your life you should be grateful you have one good thing because at least that's something." Sam grinned, "Hey Dean maybe I'm your candle."

"Well Sammy you light up my life so maybe you are."

Sam rolled his eyes, "Lame Dean, ok now mine." Sam broke his open and smoothed out the paper, "A hero is one that stands strong even though inside he is frightened."

Dean reached out and tucked a lock of hair behind Sam's ear, "That's you Sammy, always jumping in no matter how scared you are because it's the right thing to do."

Dean shifted to get up and let out a whimper he tried to stifle. Sam helped him up and looked at his wrist, "Dean you didn't fall."

Dean hung onto the door going into the bathroom, the voice was filled with emotion, "Please Sam if you love me don't ask me about it...I can't talk about it."

Dean shut the door behind him and locked it.

….

Dean slept almost the entire next day and when Sam got home from school he immediately went to check on his brother. Dean was laying there staring at nothing in particular; his green eyes flickered to Sam briefly.

"How was school Sammy?"

"Good Dean, I got your homework for you. I'll help you…your driver's education starts next month right?"

"Yeah."

He warmed up the soup from Miss Ko and Sam fed Dean while they watched TV together, a program on ghost hunting was on and Dean snorted, "What losers…all fake they would shit their pants if they saw one for real."

That made Sam feel better, it was a glimmer of his old brother coming back, "Yeah Dean these guys are a joke, you and dad would have …" His voice trailed off and he kept eating.

Dean noticed the lack of follow through, "Right Sam dad and I would have had that place cleaned out already. They just sit and talk to them, remember the first salt and burn we took you on?"

Sam grinned giving Dean the dimple treatment, "I like burning stuff."

Dean reached over and squeezed his hand briefly, "That was an awesome day."

….

Dean shuffled to the bathroom to shower again, his phone buzzed and Sam answered, "What do you want?"

"How's Dean doing?"

Sam was shaking with rage over Dick Roman daring to call, "Fuck off!" He hung up and kept folding laundry then it buzzed again.

"I said fuck off , what did you do to him…god your horrible I hate you more than anyone in the world now stop calling!"

"Don't hang up again you little shit, I gave your brother exactly what he wanted…he loved it Sam, begged for me to do things to him, Sam your brother is a real nice piece of ass. So tight and sexy…I get hard just thinking about him. I own him now remember that."

Sam snapped, "Shut up about Dean! You probably are full of diseases you pig."

Sam hung up and shut the phone off, he went to the bathroom and quietly opened the door. Sam drew back the shower curtain and Dean had his arms braced on the wall, his shoulders were shaking as he cried.

Sam was shocked at the state of his body, different stages of bruises were healing but most were fresh. His ankles and wrists were raw and Sam couldn't see the rest but he knew there was much more hidden.

Dean looked over his shoulder then leaned his forehead back against the shower wall, "Well now you know…I didn't want this, don't think I did Sam. I don't have a choice anymore."

Sam wanted to wash him clean and take away all the pain but instead he left quietly.

….

Dean came out in Johns robe and lay down, Sam opened it and Dean let him because he was tired of hiding everything. "Dean let me look." Dean didn't protest he just closed his eyes.

Sam went and got gauze and tape, antibacterial cream and vet wrap. John kept the Impala well stocked with emergency medical supplies and they had brought back the box of it.

He started with Deans ankles working over the raw skin with cream, bandages and wrap then he did his wrists. Sam saw the bite on Dean's shoulder and rubbed it with the cream then Sam went exploring.

The slender fingers worked gently over each bruise on the front of him but when Sam touched his brother between the legs Dean rolled on his stomach and tightened his legs together.

"I wasn't being weird Dean I was just checking."

Sam stroked down the back and arms then up his legs to Dean's rear and stopped, "I know this is where you hurt the most, can I look?"

"Gross Sam you're my brother…no."

"Stop it Dean it's like if you got hurt hunting I would fix you up right?"

"Nothing you can fix Sam, I'm broken for good there…I got nothing special anymore, nothing to give you."

Sam frowned, "What are you talking about?"

Dean didn't answer.

Sam checked him touching and pressing but when Dean sucked in a breath he stopped, "It looks sore and raw Dean…maybe we should go to the free clinic. They don't ask questions there."

"I'm fine."

Sam didn't think he looked fine at all.

…

Castiel sat there staring at the wall and when he heard Gabriel he stepped to the glass, "Did you tell them what they want to hear?"

"Yes…I lied, if I get back there I'm going to do everything I can to help them. I'm not going to sit there useless anymore following an impossible task. You cannot have feelings for someone and not save them."

Gabriel sighed and glanced over to the council member standing next to him, "Wrong answer Cas."

TBC


	21. Cherry Red

Sam felt Dean sweating through the sheets and shivering next to him, he felt his brother's forehead and he was burning up. "Dean I'm taking you to the clinic." Dean mumbled something and sat up slowly as Sam got his clothing and dressed him.

The bus ride there seemed to take forever and when they entered there were a full waiting room of people. Sam found a seat for Dean and went to the desk, the woman seemed world weary, frazzled and lost looking at the sea of people needing their help but when she saw Sam his sad face snapped her out of a long pity party where she was the only one invited.

Sam pointed to Dean, "My brother is sick and he needs to see a doctor right away." She looked at the young man shivering and pale as milk, "His name?"

"Dean…he can't wait I think he's dying or something."

She looked at him again, "Drugs?"

Sam grew angry, "No! Dean is hurt really bad inside."

Sam spotted a nurse and ran over grabbing her arm, "My brother is hurt bad inside, I think he's dying and he can't wait." Rose looked over and thought that indeed the boy looked terrible; she looked down at Sam and gave him a smile, "I'm sure he's not dying but tell you what, I'll put you in a room that opened up but I can't promise how quick we can get to you."

Sam nodded, "Thanks that's fine."

….

Dean sat there on the table feeling miserable as the nurse tried to get information, she was so intrusive that he started to get up to leave, "I gotta go…I thought this was all no questions asked stuff."

She tapped the folder she was holding with a pen and made a decision, Rose decided it was better he stayed and got treatment than to run because she had to know his life story. "Fine you win."

Doctor Zarabi came in and examined Dean, she noted the fever and shaking then saw needle marks in his arm. "Do you use?"

Dean looked her in the eye, "No, someone gave that to me…I didn't want it." Sam grabbed her sleeve and whispered in her ear.

"Dean, bend over the table for me."

Dean looked indignant, "Why can't you just give me pills and I can go? Sam what the hell did you tell her?"

"The truth, if dad were here he would kick your ass for being a baby so do what she says…I'm tired Dee just don't argue."

Dean bent over and felt her lubricated fingers probe inside of him, she pushed and worked as gently as she could. He heard her take off the gloves, "Stand up I'm done. So who did that to you because you didn't do it to yourself."

Dean shrugged, "A guy what does it matter?"

Sam wanted to blurt out the real answer but he sat there silent and angry.

Doctor Zarabi gave Dean a shot, "I ask because someone like that should be in jail…was it a trick?"

Dean glared at her, "I'm not a whore!"

"I never said you were, look you're torn up, you don't need stitches but you have an infection going on there. You have to keep it extra clean, I'm giving you two bottles of antibiotics and a couple tubes of cream. I'd make you come back but something tells me you won't. Dean stay away from this guy and no sex…god I hope you used condoms. I'm sending some along, do you know how many people out there are coming to be treated for a STD?"

Dean pulled up his pants and wouldn't look her in the eye, "Thanks for the advice."

Sam put the pills, cream, list of instructions and condoms in his pocket.

…

Thanksgiving came and went with them having soup for their meal, Sam was keeping Dean's meals light. Sam made sure Dean took every pill and he fielded all the calls from Dick Roman.

He sent gifts for Christmas but never showed up. Sam assumed it was guilt over destroying his brother but actually Dick was overseas the whole time.

Their Christmas was a somber one, their gifts were each other's company and a pie Sam picked up. They watched "It's a Wonderful Life" on TV and Dean rested his head in Sam's lap watching the angel Clarence, "Sammy do you think Cas is dead…can angels die?"

"I don't know Dean, he would never just leave us, what happened can't be good, I miss him. All his stuff is still in the apartment, its unlocked but no one ever goes in…the landlord doesn't bother with rent and it's like only we know it's there."

It was true, Castiels apartment didn't exist except to the Winchesters, anyone else passing it would only see a wall.

…..

Dean's ordeal got him a big payday for his pain and suffering, enough money to buy them time away from Dick Roman until January with plenty to spare for food and incidentals.

Dean turning sixteen would have been uneventful and forgotten if not for Sam, he bought cupcakes and candles and since Dean was back on a regular diet he forced him out of the apartment to go to the diner for lunch that weekend.

Loretta handed them menus and noticed the weight Dean had lost and the vacant look on his face, "Hey honey how are you?"

Before Dean could answer Sam piped up, "Great, today is Dean's birthday and he's sixteen." She smiled softly at Sam, "You are just the cutest, you boys order and dessert is on me for his birthday how about that?"

…

They sat there eating their banana splits, Sam dropped the cherry on Deans, "I don't like those…hey Dean now that your sixteen then next summer we can leave right?"

"What about school Sam…what about Cas?"

"Cas can find us, he's an angel, Dean I can figure out school for next year. That's a long way off."

"Baby let's play this by ear I don't know what's gonna happen."

…

When they got back a package was at the door, Dean picked it up and they went inside. He opened it and there was a set of car keys, Dean's phone vibrated and he answered, "What are these for?"

"You're new metallic cherry red Shelby Mustang…a peace offering. I know you must be out of money. Happy Birthday Dean."

Dean hadn't spoken to Dick Roman since the violation months before, "You ruined me…I'll never be the same because of you. I can feel what you did, it never goes away."

"Dean that was awhile ago, I thought you'd be all healed up and ready to see me. You gave in, I own you so stop talking like a child. I'm coming to pick you up for the day tomorrow and show you the new car, your name is on the title."

"No thanks I got the Impala."

"Save it for Sam this is much better…look if you don't come I'll put Sam in stirrups and see how he likes things up his ass. I will make you watch me do it, you know I can get him whenever I want to. Now what's your answer?"

"You win…you always win don't you?"

"Of course I do, life with me is going to be good Dean I like you…dare I say I have feelings for you. I think my face is actually blushing!"

"God I fucking hate you so much."

"I forgive you for saying that Dean, well anyway be ready or I'll get the table ready for Sam."

…..

Dean stood in the massive garage where rows of cars sat, he fingered the paint on the Mustang and when Dick Roman handed him the title Dean got in. The interior was black leather and he thought it was the prettiest thing he ever owned.

Afterward Dick brought him to a bedroom and Dean undressed, there wasn't any fighting or struggle because he knew it didn't matter anymore. He laid there waiting.

Dick got on the bed between his legs and kneeled there looking down; Dean spread them and stared at the ceiling. "Did I really hurt you that bad Dean?"

"I got an infection…Sam saved me, made me go to the doctor. You fucked me up inside I don't feel right anymore."

Dick pushed two slick fingers inside and felt him, "I feel some scaring but nothing bad, I think your being a drama queen over this." Dean pulled his legs back wider, "Just get it over with."

Dick took his time sliding in slowly and didn't rush, now that Dean was his he didn't have to work as hard and just fucked the teenager without any torture or threats.

"You feel really good Dean, still tight and velvety soft…the scars aren't bad at all."

Dean grunted every time he thrust inside him and kept his eyes closed, he felt Dick finish and when he was done Dean laid there not moving. He gave himself but he didn't have to like it.

Dick sucked Dean off after that and he loathed the fact the man could make him orgasm, he pumped his hips up and came almost silently. Dean hated himself afterward for enjoying it.

Afterward Dick took Dean out and let him drive the Mustang to the restaurant where people parted like the red sea for Dick Roman and Dean. He felt a rush of power on the man's arm and knew not one person would touch him.

That was when Dean began to change.

…..

Dean stared at the menu and nothing looked good to him, he closed it and said he wasn't hungry.

Dick frowned, "What do you mean, this is your birthday dinner…what do you want?"

Dean shrugged, "I'm a simple guy I just want a bacon cheeseburger and fries but they don't have that at a place like this."

Dick snapped his fingers and Henry leaned over, "Go back and tell the chef that Dick Roman wants a bacon cheeseburger and fries." Henry nodded and left, a half hour later the waiter came over with Dick Romans coq au vin and Dean's burger and fries.

The chef came out awhile later and checked with Dean to be sure it was to his liking, Dean looked at him like he had an extra head, "Yeah it's a bacon cheese burger you can't fuck that up…the fries are greasy though I can tell you don't fry much here."

Deans simple comment made Dick roll his eyes up and stare at the chef, the man became flustered and apologized until Dean stopped him, "It's just fries not the end of the world just chill out ok?"

Dick pushed a box over to Dean, he opened it and two thin gold cuff bracelets was inside, "You wear these all the time now, your owned and everyone needs to know that."

Dean sighed and slipped them both on, "I'm not wearing them all the time especially in front of Sam."

"Oh well maybe Sam would look better in them."

Dean locked eyes, "I wish you would die."

Dick laughed, "Dean you're so dramatic."

TBC


	22. Taboo Kiss

Dick tied him to the bed and blindfolded him, Dean knew the man was taking photos and filming him so he did nothing making it as boring as possible.

"Dean you're starting to get dull for me and you know how I hate that, should I spice things up a little for you?"

"You're the one that's boring; you can't enjoy yourself without doing something painful or weird. What's it like to not be able to love someone? Your life sucks Dick I wouldn't want your money if it meant being like you."

Dick grabbed him roughly between his legs and gave a twist, "I don't need to love anyone, I'm making the best of a bad situation with this life."

Dean let out a sharp cry and gritted his teeth then the hand let go, the blindfold came off and Dick touched his face gently. "Next summer I'm taking you to my island."

"I would never leave Sammy to go to some island so we can play "Lord of the Flies" and I end up dead in some pit filled with punji stakes."

Dick started to finger him absentmindedly as Dean grunted with the movement, his eyes were black and far away, "You do what I tell you now." He pulled out of Dean and started to walk out but Dean panicked.

"Hey come on I want to go home, I spent the night."

Dick stopped in his tracks, "I'll pay you Dean don't worry…I always pay don't I?"

"Please come on, I need to go back to Sam now."

"In a few hours when I'm ready, I'll have Henry bring you back."

…..

Dean drove back with Henry and kept glancing at the silent man, "How long have you worked for him?"

"A long time Mister Winchester."

"So what is he?"

"You ask too many questions."

The man shut down and Dean knew he was done talking.

They pulled up in front of the building; Dean patted the money in his pocket and hobbled up the steps feeling like ten miles of bad road.

…..

Winter passed slowly, Dean only saw Dick Roman once a month after that. Thankfully the man was busy traveling and Dean assumed making life miserable for as many people as possible.

Sam went to school every day which encouraged Dean go. He got his drivers license thanks to Dick Roman, Dean was barely making grades but as long as he was passing that's all Sam cared about. To Sam it was better than not going at all. It gave them both a touch of normalcy in a very abnormal life.

…

Sam stood in front of the steamed up mirror and wiped it with his hand, two years without John and here he was twelve years old living in the same apartment still alive and just surviving the best he knew how.

Lies were an everyday occurrence, to teachers, the landlord, people at the diner, anyone that knew them could have never imagined the life the brothers lead.

It was Sam's birthday but it seemed like any other day to him. The only change from the last one was Sam hitting a growth spurt putting on pounds and inches already showing signs of the very large man to come.

Sometimes his body was a source of pleasure, other times he couldn't stand to look at it let alone touch himself. His hair was still shaggy and too long, Dean teased him when Dean was in the teasing mood. Sam missed that about his brother but then Sam missed a lot of things.

Tonight Sam was going to give Dean an ultimatum or at least that was his plan. Dean promised when Sam was done with school for the year they would sell everything, take the Impala and leave.

Dean had been backtracking, saying he couldn't go, that Dick Roman would find them and hurt Sam.

Then there was the angel, Deans heart ached for him after all those months wondering if he left on his own or was taken. Sam was worried also but he tried to stay upbeat for Dean telling him not to worry, that Castiel could find them anywhere they went.

It was a hard life for a boy of twelve on the cusp of puberty; he kept to himself at school not getting close to anyone in particular. Sam didn't date, didn't have a crush on anyone at all.

There was only one person Sam truly loved and that was his brother Dean, now it seemed the one who owned his heart was hanging on by a thread and Sam tried to find a way to pull him back.

Sam didn't realize the how long and twisted that road ahead to salvation was truly going to be.

…

They sat in the back of the theater waiting for the movie to start, middle back row was the favorite spot. Dean let Sam pick the movie and was relieved it was a buddy cop comedy, he let Sam pick out the snacks and Sam came back with all of Dean's favorites plus a tub of popcorn and one giant soda for the two of them.

Dean glanced over at Sam laughing, he felt proud of what a tall, handsome guy his brother was becoming. How very smart and capable Sam was and Dean felt if he had any blessings at all it would have to be Sam.

Sam was going to hit Dean's height before he knew it and all the baby fat was gone. The angles of his face sharp but still sweet.

Sam had a smile that could light up a room, Dean joked he was a ball of sunshine. The dimples were deep and adorable but the face was that of a young man instead of a boy.

Dean knew that life was hard for his little brother and it was a burden he carried with him every day. He strived for more and more, hording money and jewelry for his brother in case anything happened to him.

Dean knew he had made a promise to Sam last year to leave that summer but all Dean heard on a repeating loop was Dick Roman threatening to find them and taking Sam away. It was a rock and hard place for Dean, run and try or stay and survive the best way he knew how.

…..

Sam burst out laughing at the next scene in the movie and Dean laughed with him, he leaned over and whispered, "This feels good Sammy, like old times right?"

Sam turned and they were face to face inches from each other, "Yeah Dean" was all that came out as his throat ran dry. He could smell the chocolate and butter on his brother's breath and he froze.

Dean broke the spell and turned back to the screen.

….

They sat at the Chinese restaurant and Sam examined his brother's face as he sucked the liquid loudly from the bottom of his glass, Dean made a face at him, "God Sammy stop that it's driving me nuts!"

"Dean you have pretty eyes for a boy."

"You are so weird Sam I swear."

"Do you think I have pretty eyes Dean?"

"Yeah sure Sam for being a twelve year old kid brother I think you have the prettiest eyes ever."

Miss Ko brought over the check and their fortune cookies, she overheard the conversation, "I think you both have pretty eyes, your brother said you are twelve now. This meal is on me then, Happy Birthday Sam."

Sam smiled up at her, "Thanks!"

She stood there wringing her hands wanting desperately to ask them something and then decided the direct approach was the best, "Boys have you seen your neighbor…heard from him at all?"

Dean looked at her confused, "Did you know Cas?"

"Well you could say we worked together at one time, he is missing."

Dean looked down at the table griping the edge tightly, Sam noticed him becoming emotional and piped in, "We don't know what happened but we miss him, if you find out anything would you tell us?"

She nodded, "Of course Sam, I am sure he is fine." Miss Ko walked into the alley behind the restaurant and stared up at the sky, "Where are you brother, what have they done with you?"

…

"Dean, open your fortune cookie first."

Dean cracked it, he opened the paper and hoped for something good, "Making a living is not the same as making a life."

Dean knew exactly what that meant; he tucked it in his wallet with the others and didn't say a word.

Sam opened his and held it up, ""Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage."

Sam knew exactly what is meant as well, he tucked in his wallet with the others and smiled at Dean.

…..

Dean brought over a cupcake with a candle and sang to Sam, he murdered a nice traditional happy birthday song but it made Sam laugh.

"Blow out the candle Sammy make a wish."

Sam blew it out, "Dean you know what I wished for?"

"Don't tell me or it won't come true."

Sam pulled out the candle and sucked the frosting off the end then split the cupcake handing half to Dean, "I don't believe in all that, I think they come true if you make them happen yourself."

Dean popped the half in his mouth and shrugged, "Go ahead then tell me."

"I wished that you would keep your promise and we can leave this summer, Dean everything will be ok if we go together. I don't care about Dick Roman or his money. I care about the stuff he makes you do and how you hurt afterward."

"Sammy if I was eighteen and anyone stopped us they couldn't say a word. No one would take you away and it would be smooth sailing. I wish Cas was here then we could…"

Sam interrupted, "I love Cas too Dean and it would have been easier with him but he isn't here and I can't wait two years to get you away from that man…the monster. Dean you know he isn't really a man right?"

Dean played with the tie on Johns robe and mumbled, "I know, I'm not stupid."

Sam got on his knees and grabbed his brother's shoulders, "Then we can kill him we just have to figure out how. We have all of dad's books, what did he used to tell us Dean?"

Dean looked at Sam with a glimmer of hope, "That everyone and everything has a weakness and if you watch closely enough it will reveal itself. Sammy do you think we could do it?"

"Sure Dean we just have to figure it out together."

Dean covered himself with a blanket and started to cry quietly, Sam lay next to him and pulled the blanket off so they were face to face, "Tell me what's wrong, what makes you sad."

"You already know Sam…I'm tired, I hurt so much all the time. I'm dirty and used up and if it wasn't for you I don't know what I would do."

Sam pressed a kiss on his mouth and his heart leapt when the kiss was returned and Dean didn't shove him away or make a joke.

Dean held his brothers face in his hands, "No do it like this…your too hard Sam…just relax." He fit their mouths together and went gentle and slow, when Sam tried to push his tongue in Dean showed him that as well and they kissed, mingling tongues for several minutes.

When Sam opened the robe and pressed against him Dean felt him for the first time, hard and eager, he pulled away for the warm lean body and whispered, "No Sam I told you I'm dirty." He got up and left going to Castiels apartment and locked the door.

He grabbed a bottle of wine the angel left and started drinking to wash away the taste of his brother but it was no use. Dean would remember it forever, chocolate slick with saliva, the desperate body and the love.

…

Sam sat there dazed for a moment then followed trying the door and finding it locked, he knocked lightly, "Dean please come back."

Dean drank again, "No I'm sick…I'm bad Sam. A brother wouldn't do that ever."

Sam pressed his cheek against the door, " Let me in then."

Dean got up, opened the door and Sam came in, he sat on the couch and watched Dean shuffle over and flop down next to him.

"Sam I'm in…I want to kill him but we have to figure out how."

Sam felt relief flood through his body, "I'll do anything it takes Dean to get rid of him."

….

Castiel sat in front of them all again, "Well Castiel are you going to be a team player?"

Castiel glanced at the angel blade peeking from one of their coats, "No…I am not as you say a team player, not anymore."

Gabriel left him in his own self imposed prison.

….

"No Sam I won't let you do this, the things he could do you…"

"It's my body Dean, don't worry as long as you get to me in time everything will be ok."

TBC

"Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage." Lao Tzu

The other saying is a take on a quote from Maya Angelou but not the exact quote.


	23. Blood Black Sacrifice

Dean watched as Sam dialed Dick Romans private number and he almost hung up when he heard the monsters voice, "Dean what a pleasure to hear from you."

Sam closed his eyes and thought of every sad thing he could think of, the emotions filled his voice making him sound pitiful and frightened, "Dick…Dick its Sam."

"Sam? Why are you calling me?"

"Dean has been missing for days and I'm all alone…I'm so scared and I don't have anyone to help me. He doesn't even have his phone, Dick I need you."

There was a pause at the other end and then a sigh, "Sam you have to forgive my incredulity, I'm the last person you would ever ask for help…am I wrong?"

Sam became worried, he hadn't expected any hesitation, "Well Cas is gone and I honestly have no one, would you come over?"

….

Dick Roman smiled hearing the scared boy on the other end, his hand traveled between his legs and he squeezed slightly already feeling the need for Sam. "Sure Sam I'll be right over."

Henry asked if he needed him to drive, "No Henry this is a solo mission, you go out and find my Dean while I procure a sad, scared little brother."

…

Dean chewed his nail nervously, "Sammy I don't think this is safe for you, Dick is …he's…oh god what if he does something to you? I can't stand the thought of his hands all over you baby."

"Dean it's ok, you got the gun with the silencer, I got my knife under the pillow and it's going to work out. We kill him, take what we can and leave."

"I'll be right in the stairwell ok? As soon as he goes in I'll listen at the door, Sammy you yell if anything goes wrong."

…

The knock came at the door, "Sam its Dick Roman."

Sam took a breath and opened the door putting on his game face, he rolled his eyes up locking them with the monsters, "Dee isn't back…I'm so scared!" Dick looked past the boy around the room cautiously, "So there isn't anyone else here?"

Sam walked over and sat on the bed, he hung his head, "No I've been alone for awhile. What do I do?" Sam forced himself to cry and that was it, Dick shut the door and locked it behind him then pushed a door under the knob for good measure.

Sam panicked inside but outwardly tried not to show it.

Dick went and sat next to Sam thinking he hit the lottery.

Sam tensed when he felt the hand rubbing across his shoulders, "It's ok Sam…I'm here now and I'll take care of everything. Henry is looking for Dean and in the meantime I could relax you."

Sam stared at his phone and the locked door with the chair securing it, "Um…could I go to the bathroom first?" Dick nuzzled his ear, "Sure Sam, want me to watch?"

Sam went to grab his phone but Dick beat him to it and snatched it away, "Sam you don't need a phone to go to the bathroom…unless you're calling someone. Is that it Sam?" Sam's voice was almost a whisper, "No."

He went in and locked the door trying to buy himself some time. After a few minutes Dick spoke to him right outside the door, "Come out Sam, if I have to come and get you then this game will get ugly very fast."

Sam thought of the knife under the pillow, he steeled himself and left the bathroom sitting on the bed again. "I don't want to do anything, I just wanted company."

Dick shoved him back and pinned his wrists then forced his mouth over Sam's, the boy screamed for Dean but it came out muffled.

…..

Dean heard the noise and tried the knob then fumbled with the keys getting them in the lock, he shoved the door but the chair held as Dean put his weight on it, "Sam!"

Dick broke the kiss and grinned down at his prey, "You both played me…I'm impressed!" He let go of one wrist and deftly opened Sam's jeans, tugged them down with his boxers and groped him.

Sam worked his hand under the pillow grabbing the knife and swung wildly with all the practice gone out the window, it hit home in Dick Romans back sinking deep.

He let out a bellow and then a gasp as the air escaped a lung; he rolled off Sam, reached back and pulled out the knife. A hissing sound came from him as Sam wanted him crawl on all fours into the bathroom and lock himself in.

This gave Sam the chance to kick the chair out as Dean burst into the room, he saw his brothers pants down and knew the man had touched his brother throwing Dean into a blind rage.

Dean threw himself into the locked bathroom door, "I'm going to fucking kill you..gut you…I'm…"

Sam grabbed his brothers arm "Dean I stabbed him in the lung, I think he's dying." Dean stopped and listened at the door, it was quiet.

Sam was holding back the tears as he pulled up his pants and waited holding the bloody knife.

After a few minutes of silence Dean picked the lock and pushed the door open, Dick Roman had his eyes closed and Dean took a head shot to be sure. A trail of black goo trickled down the handsome face and it brought Dean some satisfaction.

The body jerked and Dean dropped to his knees feeling for a pulse, "He's dead…god it's over Sammy." Running on adrenaline Dean frantically started packing, "Sam go in the basement storage and in our bay is dads luggage, go get it."

Sam ran downstairs and unlocked the cage that held the suitcases and other things John had left behind . He grabbed two and dragged them up the stairs but when he got there and walked in Dick Roman had his brother.

Sam dropped the suitcases as stared in disbelief, "Your alive…it's not possible!"

Dick looked bad but there were no holes or tears in the flesh, his head was covered in the black blood but no apparent trauma, "Sam you little cock tease, you think it's so easy to get rid of me?"

Dean moaned, "Sammy leave, get away from me."

Dick kissed Dean's cheek, "No Sam you stay here, I have people coming. I want to see how well you both do with nothing. Now I want Dean to crawl," he shoved him to his knees and kicked him in the ribs, "do it…crawl for me you filthy whore."

Dean crawled a few feet and then sat; Sam ran to him and stood over his brother protectively. Men showed up a short time later and took everything Dick had given them, stereo, computers, TV, anything of value was gone.

They ransacked everything until the cigar box of money and jewelry was found hidden up under the ceiling tile, everything Dean had save for them to leave was in there including the diamond ring.

Sam dropped down next to Dean and held him, Dick Roman tossed the gun in the bed, "You can keep anything that's yours. I don't care, you can't leave; now you have nothing Dean."

Dean looked up trying to be defiant but he found no fire in his words, "I earned all of that…every cent, you can't do this!"

Dick left Dean his phone, "Oh it's still yours but I'll keep it for you. Let's see how much you enjoy hustling tricks on the street, Sam maybe you can help. I bet a lot of men would pay to bend you over something…after the first time you're not worth as much. Dean can show you the ropes because he can really put out."

Sam balled up his fists, "Shut up."

Dick laughed and grabbed Dean by the hair tilting his head back, "Sam your brother took it right up the ass so many times I can't believe he can walk! Only by me though, because he's mine.

Dick grinned at the horror on Sam's face, "Dean you should tell Sam how you held that boy down for me while tortured him…how you fucked him and he screamed for you to help him but you kept right on going with a smile, sloppy seconds Sam."

Sam looked at his brother with shock, "Dean…you hurt someone?"

Dick pointed to the bottles of booze, "Keep those Dean, you look like a drinker. Remember to wear a condom out there; I don't want some disease when you crawl back to me."

The door slammed leaving Sam and Dean with nothing.

…

July first came and there was no rent money, Dean was sixteen and figured he could get a job doing something and he found one stocking shelves part time at a grocery store but all that money did was keep them fed. There was never anything left for rent, incidentals or an emergency.

Dean got home that night to a notice on the door to vacate unless the rent was paid, he pulled it off and walked in the hot, suffocating box of an apartment. Sam was laying there in front of the old fan creaking out its last breath and then it died as if on cue.

Dean stripped naked no longer caring, the sweat ran down his body and he smelled his pits then made a face, "I stink…gotta shower."

"They shut the water off Dee."

That was it, Dean collapsed on the bed and dropped the paper, Sam opened it up and read the eviction notice and started to cry.

"I know what I have to do now Sam."

"No Dean you can't!"

TBC


	24. Whore

Dean pulled him in his arms even though the heat from Sam's body made it all worse, his boxers were sticking to him and Dean pulled them off. "Sam it's going to be ok."

They started kissing pressed against each other, it had been awhile since that first time they truly kissed and now it felt like there was nothing left to lose. Sam closed his eyes as Dean sucked a bruise on his neck then traced along the slim collar bone stopping at the shoulder.

Dean came to his senses stopping himself in time; Sam rolled his head on the pillow, "Dean it feels good, keep doing that." Sam grabbed his hand and the pushed it between his legs squeezing them shut tight trying to force Dean to stroke him, "Touch me there…feels good when you do it."

Dean pushed Sam's leg to the side and pulled his hand out, "Sam if I do it we can't come back from that. If you're embarrassed after or I feel bad we can't change it and I don't want you to hate me later…I don't wanna be a pervert to you like the monster."

Sam laid there frustrated and touched himself instead, "You took off my boxers, don't lie and say it was because they were wet or I was hot. I'm sick of lies, you like to kiss me I know it because your hard."

Sam turned his back and closed his eyes again trying to finish what Dean started with his kisses. Dean reached over Sam's hip searching with his fingers finding the hardness and worked him slowly listening to his brothers whimpers into the pillow, it took just a few moments for Sam to reach orgasm.

Afterward Dean stared at the ceiling and eventually Sam rolled back and put his head on Deans chest, "I'm not embarrassed…I loved it Dean don't worry ok?"

Sam's hair was wet and sticking to his face, Dean pushed it off and gave Sam his first compliment, "Your beautiful Sam…really handsome."

Sam raised his head and smiled, "You never say stuff like that." Dean wiped the sweat off his forehead then ran a thumb over the deep pink mouth, "Well I should, its true Sammy."

Sam looked down at Dean's body and tried to touch him, "I can do stuff for you now."

Dean pushed his hand away, "No I'm dirty. Sam I'm going to have to start doing things…you know that right?"

"Dean could we move into Castiels apartment? Then we don't have rent anymore."

"What do you mean?"

Sam tried to explain what happened, "Today I was standing at the door to go in and forgot I locked it, I took out the key and Mrs. Gutierrez stopped and asked why I was sticking a key in the wall…Dean she couldn't see a door."

It dawned on Dean then why the angel's personal items were still there and there never was an eviction, it was if the apartment existed but only for them.

The boys immediately gathered what they had left and waited until the middle of the night to move their clothes and personal effects into the angel's apartment. The only things Dick Roman had left when he took away almost everything was the bed, bedding and loveseat and booze only because he didn't want to move the furniture and the booze was a dig at Dean's drinking habits.

They struggled but got those items moved in as well and when they were done it was as if the boys had never lived there.

…..

By mid month the grocer let Dean go because of the slow business, his last check went right back into the grocery store for food, toilet paper and other essentials. Not having to pay the rent now was a relief but there was still no money coming in.

That night after losing his job Dean showered thoroughly cleaning himself, he slipped condoms into his pocket as Sam watched.

Dean hadn't touched him since that day they kissed and Dean had brought Sam to orgasm. In fact Dean slept in Castiels little bed and Sam slept in theirs, most mornings Dean would find Sam pressed against him anyway but he never touched him back.

Dean's hands were shaking as he laced his shoes, "Dean don't do this please, I don't want you with anyone else ever again."

"Sam I have to, we gotta start all over and save money. We can't ever escape this place otherwise. I'll use condoms or make them use one even if I use my mouth they have to wear one ok?"

Sam watched him out the window walking down the street heading for a bar. Sam sat down and prayed hard for Castiel, "Cas we need you, Dean is going to get hurt again and we have to get out of this…Cas you can be with Dean too, it's ok if he loves us both. I can share him if you promise to help…you can live with us, just please come back."

…..

Castiel was now a project, a tortured and failed angel they kept for amusement. On display for those that bent or broke the rules and he sat day after day in pain, not over what they did to him but for the fact that he made mistakes that cost two boys their freedom.

What he endured was nothing he felt was in comparison to what they did on a daily basis, he heard Sam's prayer. The angel heard all of them but he was trapped and impotent.

….

Dean walked in the bar mustering as much confidence as he could, he had hustled pool with his dad even as a kid and wasn't as stranger to bars but this was a whole new thing.

Dick Roman gave it all structure with money at the end, lots of it. Dean was now truly working for trick money and when the men all watched him walk in his stomach tightened in a knot.

Suddenly his benefactor didn't seem so horrible.

…

Dean leaned on the bar and stuck out his goodies, it didn't take long for someone to hit on him. The man was middle age, scruffy and average. Dean never would have noticed him in a crowd but he didn't look horrible or especially dangerous. Dean felt the strangers hand move over his ass and squeeze, "You bottom?"

Dean tensed up and responded, "Yeah."

"How much?"

Dean had no idea; he shot for a high number and hoped for the best giving him room to bargain, "Five hundred?"

The man started to laugh, "Kid are you joking? You are damn hot but I don't have the kind of money!"

Deans face flushed, "Look I never did this ok? I need real money mister I can't give it away…two fifty?"

He grabbed Dean by the shoulders and looked at him closer, "One fifty…thats fucking high I usually pay like fifty bucks but it's your first time and I just cashed my check so I'm feeling flush…next time fifty bucks."

Dean thought there wouldn't be a next time, "You gotta wear a condom."

"Sure whatever, follow me."

Dean followed him to his truck parked behind the bar, the man opened the passenger door, "Pull down your pants so I can touch you…then lean over the seat and I'll fuck you."

Dean did it, he stood there being fondled for almost five minutes as the man hardened, he grabbed Dean by the shoulders, spun him around and leaned his weight on Deans back pinning him bent over the truck seat.

"No wait I have condoms in my pocket! You son of a bitch…let me up!" Dean kicked out with his boot but his pants restricted his movements, he was relieved when he heard a wrapper opening.

"What do you think, I want to fuck that shitty little ass of yours without a fucking raincoat? Whore…your all the same."

He slammed into Dean hard forcing his face into the seat to muffle the screams, the man had whiskey dick and took forever it seemed to Dean and then it was over he pulled Dean up, shoved crumpled bills in his hand and dropped the used condom at Deans feet.

"You are damn tight, you feel all fucked up in there there…got some scars. It's ok they felt good." The man shoved Dean away and slammed the door, "Pleasure bumps right?" He started laughing and got in the truck.

…

He watched the truck drive away; Dean bent down and winced at the old pain starting again. He pulled up and closed his jeans the looked at the crumpled bills in his hand and counted ninety dollars.

Dean couldn't go in again and hobbled home to Sam.

…

Dean came in as quietly as he could and took off all his clothes then got in the shower scrubbing until he was pink. He wrapped himself in Johns robe and this time crawled in the big bed with Sam.

His brother woke up face to face on the pillow with his brother, "Dean…you ok?"

"I did it Sam, I made ninety dollars."

Sam caught a stray tear off the freckled cheek, "I prayed to Cas so I know he's going to come and you won't do this again. Dean we can forage or something, I'm not scared to dumpster dive."

"And then do what Sam, live here forever eating garbage?"

Sam mumbled, "I'm trying to help."

"I'm sorry Sam I just hurt right now and I'm not myself."

Sam kissed him on the mouth and pushed his tongue in, Dean responded in kind and for a few moments it was just Sam and world be damned but then he stopped. "I'm so tired Sam can you just hug me?"

Sam hugged him and talked softly about a movie he watched, the funny parts, the bad acting and how he wished Dean could have seen it. Dean fell asleep listening to Sam's voice and not hearing the words but the music of his voice.

Dean dreamed, the angel, Sam, his mother and father all rolled into one and he never wanted to wake up again.

TBC


	25. Prayers From The Dead

Life continued that way for them both as time slipped away. For Dean, childhood was dead and gone, no school, friends or chance to be happy except for his moments with Sam.

Dick Roman never contacted him still punishing him for the attempted murder. Dean kept going working the streets, clubs, bars, pool halls and lately started hitching rides to a large truck stop working the lonely truckers looking for a quick hump.

Dean hated the term "lot lizard" or "horse" but that's what he was, the truckers paid well and there was no small talk like a bar or club. Dean handed them a condom, bent over and took it.

Occasionally they wanted Dean to be the one to dominate and do the fucking which was the worst for him. He had to actually get hard for it and the man he had bent over the seat was less than clean or attractive, Dean slipped on the condom but was only partially erect and had to hold the base to keep it on.

He stared up at the truck cab ceiling and heard the man grunt as he worked the uninspired cock into his ass. The trucker looked back, "You're a fucking teenager, you should be hard as a rock! I'm not paying for a soft cock."

Dean squeezed his eyes shut and tried to push the smell of the cab out of his mind, he thought of beautiful Sam kissing him, the coral lips and little catlike licks of his soft pink tongue on Dean's tender neck.

Dean felt bad for dreaming of him to get hard but there was no longer a way to deny what he felt and wanted from his own brother. Dean fantasized about taking that ridged dick in his mouth and showing Sam what it felt like to have real pleasure. Dean thought of Sam a bit older and taking his virginity because the thought of anyone else having his brother turned his stomach.

Dean managed to harden enough but maintaining it was proving to be difficult, he cursed the alcohol he needed to even get this far and then thoughts turned to the angel.

Dean pictured his last time with Castiel, pining the slender wrists and taking the angel hard, the cries of passion and declarations of love but that didn't help. It was that same love from them both given to Dean freely that was making this encounter feel so wrong.

Finally Dean thought of what Dick Roman would do to the man, he would have brutalized him and Dean was able to finish then. He pulled out and immediately dropped the used condom on the floor of the truck figuring it was the man's problem now.

Dean got out and pulled the cap off his flask drinking deeply. The trucker followed after hitching up his pants and handed Dean fifty dollars, Dean looked at it and frowned, "Hey I said if I had to do you it was a hundred."

The trucker shrugged, "You weren't that good, I thought someone that looked like you…"

Dean stopped him, "What the fuck does that mean?"

"You know…like a worn out slut, bet that ass is used up already." He locked the doors and headed for the diner. Dean followed angry at being shorted, "Hey…hey I'm talking to you!"

The man stopped and turned around, "Get the fuck away from me and be satisfied."

Dean clenched his fists and fought the tears, he didn't want to cry but everything crashed down on him all at once after that. He found it harder and harder to push these encounters down and bury them and the fact he was shorted was too much.

"I got a brother that has to eat on this money! He's a kid, you short me fifty then you short him!"

The trucker snickered, "Turn him out, I bet he'd be better than you." He turned to keep walking, Dean was filled with rage running for the man but was blindsided with a crowbar to the head.

….

Dean's eyes flickered open and then closed, lights bursting behind them and the pain was excruciating. He heard men laughing and talking and when he felt the surface he was on it was cement. He caught the sight of florescent lights above him and a heavy smell of motor oil. Dean realized he was in a garage.

"Hey look, tough guy is waking up…hey horse ready to find out what happens when you take a run at my friend here?" Dean licked his dry lips and rolled on his belly crawling for the door, someone stood in front of him, "Where the fuck are you going?"

Dean closed the eye on the side that took the blow, it was too difficult to keep open, "Sorry…let me go…I gotta get home."

"Get the whores pants off." Dean felt his boots pulled off then next his jeans, he wasn't wearing boxers and the cement felt cold on his tender parts. Dean held himself protectively and curled into a ball.

The normally tough fighter couldn't get enough balance to even stand, Dean took a boot to the head and ribs and it all went black again.

…

Sam paced the floor and stared at the phone, Dean told him to never call or text when he was working. Sam prayed so hard he thought his head would explode, Castiel still never answered.

…..

Castiel heard the prayers, Dean in his nightmare begging for the angel to save him and Sam praying for Castiel to come home and find Dean. He screamed in frustration until one of his tormentors appeared outside the cell door, "Hush Castiel you cry like an infant! Have some dignity," the angel sneered, "what a captain you turned out to be."

Castiel ran for the iron grate on the door and clung to it begging, "You can have me, do what you want but just let me help them. Dean is going to die I can feel him slipping. What right do we have to let them fall like this?"

The angel raised an eyebrow and smirked, "I'll have you and do what I want anyway so go back to listening to your prayers. If he dies then Death will sort it out, now shut your mouth."

…..

Dean woke briefly feeling something inside of him, cool, slick like glass, he moaned begging them to let him go. His body was stretched open until Dean thought he would tear in half, a knee pushed home whatever it was and he blacked out again.

…..

He felt the object slide out and his hips pulled up, blood slicked the way for the men one after the other as they took him as Dean tried to call for the angel.

"What is he saying?"

One of the men bent down to listen, "He's asking for someone called "Cas"…who's that sweetheart, your little boyfriend? Well he's not gonna want you after we get done."

Dean heard them laughing after that then slipped away.

…

Dawn finally broke through the dirty windows and with his one good eye Dean saw the bottle lying next to him wet and filthy from his own body.

He started to cry knowing this was the end, that he would never see Sam again and his brother would have to fend for himself in a world of monsters. Dean would never get the chance to tell the angel how he really felt and how much he meant to him and those things seemed much worse than him dying.

After awhile the pain floated away and the words they said to him meant nothing. He closed his eyes and waited for his light to die.

…..

Sam finally called him, it was a difficult decision but with no one else to help he called the one person that could find his brother.

"Dick its Sam don't hang up!"

"What do you want Sam."

"I'm serious this time, Dean is missing for real…I know after what happened last time you don't believe me but I swear to god its true."

There was a pause and Sam's heart stopped until Dick started to talk again, "Where do you think he is?"

"Dean has been…Dean has been working the truck stop on the interstate doing stuff."

"I see."

"Please Dick I feel that something happened to him, those guys there are rough. He's come home hurt a lot, I'm really scared this time."

"I can find him."

Sam felt relief passing through him, "Thank you! How will you find him?"

"Don't thank me, I'm not doing it for you…it's for me. I can track him through his phone. Goodbye Sam."

Dick hung up and the only thing Sam could do was wait.

….

They stared down at Deans prone body, "What do we do with him…he's bleeding out."

"Dump him somewhere; let nature take its course. You're the stupid fucker that bashed his head and fucked him with a goddamn bottle. I'm not getting in trouble for you Jerry."

They tossed Dean in the back of a pick up along with his jeans and boots and drove him down a gravel road then rolled him to the bottom of a ravine to die.

…..

Dean felt himself fading in and out, he fumbled for the phone but his hands didn't want to cooperate. Finally he pressed Sam's number and rested his head on the phone waiting for him to answer.

"S…Sammy?"

Dean sounded far away, his voice was low and ragged and Sam listened carefully waiting for information, a clue so he could save him.

"Dean tell me where you are."

"Love you Sam."

"I love you too Dean, Dick Roman is going to find you ok? I had to call him Dean I'm sorry. Where are you?"

"Don't know…Sammy listen…leave."

"What?"

I'm dying…leave there…get the car…go."

Sam's voice hitched, "No you're not! Don't say that help is coming stay awake, talk to me until Dick gets there."

"Too late go…I did it for you."

The voice drifted away and Sam kept talking a mile a minute trying to get his brother to respond but he heard the breathing coming shallow and then a slow hiss. When it stopped Sam yelled into the phone demanding Dean to wake up.

…

It took four angels to hold Castiel, he was raving mad and the angelic scream was stifled by a gag. He bucked and clawed in a desperate bid to escape as he felt Deans light fading.

TBC


	26. Ressurection

Dick Roman stood at the top of the ravine watching Henry and two other men carry Dean up. When they got him to the top Dick saw Dean was only wearing a jacket and t shirt.

The private ambulance was standing by waiting to rush Dean to Dick Romans secure wing at the hospital.

Naked from the waist down they could tell Dean was a mess, blood was caked with dirt between his legs, his face was swollen on one side and an eye was closed shut. The gash on his head showed a shine of skull and his ribs looked like someone had stomped them.

They worked quickly trying to resuscitate Dean, one eye fluttered open and then closed as he took a painful breath.

Dick twisted his leather gloves together tightly, "Henry, call my hunters, I want them found."

"Yes Mister Roman, sir when they find the men…"

"When they find them Henry I want to know exactly who did what to my boy."

…

Dean was in a coma barely hanging on, Doctor Wells was tending to the boy, "Richard he's in bad shape, a few minutes one way or the other and he wouldn't have made it."

"Well Mason, fix him."

"Richard we put him in a medically induced coma and we need to get the swelling down on his brain. I'm not a miracle worker but you know I'll do everything to save him. Just so you're aware there could be brain damage."

Dick grabbed his shirt, "Money means nothing to me, fix him. Call in anyone that can do this and get it done. I don't care who you have to fly in I won't lose my..." he hesitated trying to find the right description for Dean, "just fix this mess."

Mason pulled back, "Bullying me won't help but you know we will take care of him Richard. I have specialists flying in."

Henry walked in, "I have news, the hunters found them."

Dicks jaw tightened, "Good, you know what to do then?"

"Keep them alive long enough for you to watch?"

"Yes Henry."

….

Castiel was hanging from his wrists as the jailer played the game, injure him then let him heal over and over again.

The angel ran the blade over his stomach as Castiel stifled another groan; the healing became slower as time went on. Soon he wouldn't be able to and that would be the end.

"You are so fun to play with Castiel."

Castiel lifted his head and tried to smile, "I know other ways you could have fun with me."

"How?"

"Untie me and rape me."

This intrigued the angel, he knew Castiel had been brutalized by everyone of the jailers, "Really you enjoy that?"

He tried his best to be seductive, "I would if you did it, I find you attractive."

The angel wetted his lips and looked at the naked body hanging before him, Castiel was slender and hard, his ass was pretty and the angel decided it would be nice to try him. "Yes, I think I would like that as well."

The jailer cut him down then dropped Castiel on the bed, "Don't try anything because there is no way out."

Castiel spread his legs and braced himself trying not to look at the clothing and angel blade on the floor.

The angel settled between his legs and tried to kiss Castiel on the mouth but he turned his head, it was what he hated the most. Rape was a brutal act but a kiss was so much more. It was passion, love, tenderness and the only ones he wanted to share his kisses with were Sam and Dean Winchester.

A hand struck him and the angels ring caught his cheek running a line of blood across it, "Hold still Castiel, don't ever turn away from me." He forced a kiss as he shoved his way inside then laughed as the blue eyes staring up at him filled with pain.

"You don't have much time left do you…I can feel how loose you are inside."

It was true, Castiel could feel himself slipping away but he just needed one more show of strength and this was his last chance.

As the being neared orgasm he closed his eyes and Castiel took his chance rolling off and grabbing the blade.

….

Sam called Dick Roman, every hospital, morgue and homeless shelter. He checked the internet for local news of his brother or perhaps a stranger with no identification admitted to a hospital but there was nothing.

Sam had little money left and decided to spend it on bus fare to search the hospitals himself. There were two in the city limits and the first one yielded nothing, the second was another matter.

Not one person would help him and all a young man like Sam would bring is more questions so he moved quietly looking floor by floor. There was a wing with no admittance, it was marked as private but Sam timed the doors opening for a gurney being pushed through and slipped in.

He went around the nurses' station quiet as the dead and moved like a ghost trying to find his brother. Then he spotted Henry sitting outside Deans door reading a paper and froze, he went around the corner and waited for the man to leave.

…..

Henry spotted Sam immediately but kept reading pretending he wasn't there, he wouldn't actively help Sam but that didn't mean Henry didn't need a fresh cup of coffee. He got up and stretched, folded the paper and put it down then walked past Sam without so much as a glance.

Henry stopped at the nurses' station, "Not one person is to disturb Dean while I'm gone unless it's an emergency do I make myself clear?" The three nurses nodded afraid of the man and then watched him swipe his card and leave the wing.

….

Sam couldn't believe his luck, he hurried to Dean's room and went inside but the sight before him made Sam's blood run cold. Dean was hooked up to machines that seemed to keep him breathing and his eyes were closed.

Sam walked over and gently shook his arm, "Dean its Sammy are you awake?" There was no response and Sam stood there with tears running down his face as he reached out and ghosted his fingers over the swollen features. The staples in his brother's head were nightmarish and Sam knew Dean had taken a terrible blow to the skull.

He pulled back the sheet and looked over the naked body, it was a living tale of torture. The chest and abdomen a rainbow of bruising but the worst to Sam was Deans lower body, his legs were open and a catheter was inserted, the insides of his thighs were raw and everything looked swollen as if he were kicked.

Sam knew there had to be more, there always was with Dean. It was if his brother was born to be abused by the world while Sam remained mostly untouched. He saw the dried blood on the waterproof pad under him.

Sam covered his brother back up and kissed his split, swollen lips, "I love you Dean, I can't stay here or I'll get taken away but now I know where you are so when I get some money I'll take the bus back and get you. You're going to be ok."

Sam sat and held his hand awhile talking to Dean about their life after the hospital, how Sam could drive dad's car while Dean rested in the back. How he didn't need to worry about his kid brother anymore because Sam was going to get a job and take care of them.

"Dean you can go back to school and graduate, Cas will come home and I know he's gonna do the right thing this time and help us. He loves us Dean…maybe we can all get a house and be happy. I want to start over as a family the three of us, we don't need anyone else."

Sam watched the sun hang low over the buildings and knew it was time to leave before someone else came in, He kissed him again for good measure, "Love you, I can't sleep without you Dean so wake up and we can leave just like you wanted me to do."

Sam pressed the lucky 7 keychain in Dean's hand and slipped out past Henry who stood in the shadows waiting for Sam to leave.

Henry went in the room to check on Dean and saw the keychain, he took it away and put it in the drawer with Dean's wallet so if he woke up it would still be there waiting for him.

….

After nearly two weeks Dean opened his eyes, one was still partly shut but he was glad the vision wasn't affected. He looked around the hospital room and spotted Henry there reading the paper.

Dean croaked, "Not dead."

"No sir you are very much alive, Mister Roman will be pleased."

"Sam?"

Henry looked around nervously as if Dick Roman would materialize out of thin air, "Sam was here once. He never came back sir."

….

Dean was released to Dick Roman several days later, he was brought back to the mansion and Henry wheeled him inside, Dean got up with help and walked very slowly to the bed.

Henry helped him on his side and propped pillows around him. "You have a full time nurse, her name is Daphne and she is going to help you with physical therapy, wound care and anything else you need."

Henry stood by the door when Dick came in, he sat on the bed next to Dean and touched the faded bruises on his face, "I found you Dean, I was so worried about you."

Dean didn't feel right, his coordination was off and his thoughts were in slow motion. The young man was not the same, the blow with the crowbar left Dean with tremors.

Dean opened his hand and stared down at the keychain, "Where is Sammy…I want Sam."

"Dean I told you Sam and Castiel are gone." Dick put on his best concerned face, "They left together, they couldn't take care of you."

Dean's eyes filled with tears, he knew it didn't sound right and questioned Dick Roman, "They left me? No Cas would fix me, Sammy wouldn't leave without me…would he?"

"Dean he couldn't take care of you, I said you could stay with me until you got better. Now wouldn't that be selfish of you to ask of him…Sam has his whole life ahead of him." Dick smiled and licked his lips; he leaned in and whispered, "Baby you must remember that right?"

Dean's eyes darted around the room in a state of confusion, "I don't know…I don't remember."

….

The next morning Sam used the last of his money for a bus trip to the hospital, he made his way to Dean's room but found it empty. This time Sam went to the nurses' station and demanded to know where Dean was.

The nurse looked at the door that required a keycard and frowned at Sam, "Kid how did you get in here?"

"Never mind that was my brother in that room, I know with Dick Roman, did he take Dean home with him?"

"Look if you're his brother then you know already."

Sam punched the door on the way out and made no attempt to be quiet; he cursed the world, heaven and hell with nothing safe in between from his anger at life failing them once again.

….

Dick pointed to a television and turned it on, there was a camera feed to a room somewhere with four men sitting there tied to chairs, they were beaten and begging for their lives.

Dean stared blankly for a moment until he looked closer and memories started to slowly seep in the fog.

Dick stroked his hair and kissed his forehead, "Those, my darling are the men that did this to you. Do you recognize them?"

Dean looked at the faces and recognized two of them, "Let me hear them all talk."

Dick nodded to one of the hunters via the camera, "Make them all talk…hmmm…make them say "I'm a piece of dead meat."

One by one they said it and the voices were the final piece of identification for Dean, the cruel words he heard even with his eyes closed.

Whore, slut, horse, bitch, how they laughed and cheered each other on, how Dean was mocked for calling Castiel and how he was ruined for another man. Dean could feel the bottle, the blood, each of them taking him and the night beating.

"Yeah that's them."

"What do you think they deserve Dean?"

Then Dean remembered rolling down the ravine and telling Sam goodbye.

Dean's face was tear stained but hard, "I think they should get the same chance they gave me…none."

TBC


	27. Fly Away Home

The man in charge of the culprits looked up at the camera, Dick Roman simply said, "Do it."

It was a bloodbath as two were eaten, the others were trussed up and throats slit to bleed out and hang like cattle for later.

Dean turned his head, he never saw one of them eating before and it wasn't out of pity for the men that were being killed that he averted his gaze; it was because Dean was sickened by the display from the monsters.

He turned to Dick, "Is that what you look like?

"No I'm much better looking, there are only a few of us here so don't worry Dean I won't let them eat you," Dick gave him a big smile, "that's my job."

They still didn't have a name, none that Dean could pin on them and he had no idea what Dick Roman truly was.

Dick shut off the TV and covered Dean up, he was surprised when the monster spoke almost tenderly, "They tore you open baby, they fucked you with a glass bottle and you almost bled out. I was worried you'd die. They don't even deserve to be eaten by one of my kind but I did it to make you happy."

Dean closed his eyes, "I want Sam where is he? Dick if you want me happy find my brother and I want my angel Cas."

"Don't worry about them right now worry about getting better, Sam is fine."

….

Sam wasn't fine, he was alone and Dean didn't answer the phone, Henry called him to let Sam know that his brother was alive but that was all. Life was now a hand to mouth existence every day.

…..

The nurse was cleaning Dean; he was on his side crying quietly as she finished up. Daphne patted his leg gently, "I'm all done Dean and its healing…I know this has to be hard on you but I'll get you better I promise."

His voice was trembling from the pain, "Please can I call Sam?" She slipped the needle into his arm, "I'm sorry honey but Mister Roman doesn't let me have a phone when I'm in here. This will help you sleep, when you wake up you can eat and use the bathroom then we can work on that physical therapy ok?"

Dean struggled to stay awake but he slipped into a drug induced sleep.

…

(Back to Castiel)

Castiel slammed the blade into the angel's ear and killed him instantly. He pulled it out, wiped it off and stripped the dead angel of his clothing then put on the ill fitting suit.

He took the naked body and put it on the cot covering it with the thin blanket then locked the door behind him hoping the decoy would buy him time to slip away.

Castiel worked through the maze of corridors and after quite some time found the door out where he was able to move freely in the darkness. Back to earth and his boys.

…..

Sam was laying there staring at the ceiling, his stomach hurt from hunger but the money was gone. He felt guilty for thinking of his own needs when he didn't know what was happening to his brother.

Sam got up and put on his sneakers then went to the alley and dug through the dumpster. There was nothing edible; he walked along for several blocks and watched the young hustlers working and wondered what it must have been like to be Dean out there every night.

Any car could have held the person that would take your life by an illness or death at the hands of a monster, human or otherwise. At best Dean faced being treated like garbage for selling himself to anyone with enough money for a quick fuck.

Sam hit the diner and looked in the window examining his face and body in the reflection. Sam wondered if he looked good enough to earn money that way but the tall, thin awkward boy looking back at him made Sam decide he wasn't good enough to attract anyone.

Sam spotted Loretta wiping down tables and there were only a couple patrons inside, he went in and sat down. She came over and was going to hand Sam a menu but she knew he didn't have money.

Sam tried his best to give a charming smile, "Loretta can I get something to eat? When Dean gets home I can pay you back."

She sighed, "Honey where is your brother hanging his hat these days?"

Sam got up and was going to head for the door not wanting questions or trouble but Loretta caught his arm.

She looked over at the night manager then back to Sam, "Meet me out back."

…

Castiel appeared in his apartment and looked at the large bed then noticed the boy's things strewn around. He heard all of their prayers but it had been silent since he felt Dean slipping away.

The angel couldn't feel him anymore which meant Dean was blocked from the angel's senses or dead and Sam had given up on prayer. Castiel couldn't blame him, he had failed them both and didn't know if they could ever forgive him.

He stripped and crawled into the little bed by the window then concentrated on healing from the incredibly long ordeal.

The constant damage done to him with less and less time to repair his vessel had left the angel a shell and it would take time to be of any use to the Winchesters.

….

Sam stood in the alley and waited for Loretta who came out a few minutes later, she handed him a brown paper bag, "Here honey I made you a couple sandwiches and stuck in anything else I could grab without that bitch manager seeing me. Now scoot on home before I get in trouble."

Sam thanked her and hurried back to the apartment so he could eat.

…..

Castiel grabbed his angel blade as the door opened and a figure moved to the kitchenette. Sam quickly turned around after seeing a shadow. "Who's there?"

Castiel set the blade down, "Sam?"

Sam turned on a lamp and stood there in shock to see the angel after so much time had passed. Castiel held out his arms and Sam ran to him jumping on the little bed and knocking the angel on his back, "Cas oh my god I missed you so much!"

Castiel basked in the warmth of a being that wouldn't harm him, Sam relaxed his long body over the angels and sighed, "I was so lonely Cas."

Castiel grabbed his face and planted kisses over his cheeks and lips in a rare display of uncontrolled affection, "Sam I missed you as well. I thought I would never see you again. Dean, where is he?"

Sam sat up planted over the angel's hips; he told Castiel the entire story right up until that moment.

He looked up at Sam as the boy went through a range of emotions all the while running his fingers over the angel's skin afraid he wasn't real, fearful he would abandon Sam once again.

Castiel reached up and pushed the hair off Sam's face, "I'm here now don't cry…you are so thin Sam you should eat now," he lifted the boy off him and went to the counter.

Sam's mouth watered as he watched the being bring him some milk and one of the sandwiches. He tore into it eating quickly and then went to get the other one breaking it in half and handing a part of it to Castiel.

"Sam you should eat this all, now I can get us food and you look as though you will break if I hugged you too tightly."

"Have you looked in a mirror Cas? You look like crap so eat the sandwich."

After they ate everything Sam insisted the angel sleep in the big bed with him, "I don't want to be alone ever again."

He obliged, the angel didn't actually sleep but he could hold Sam while he slept and comfort him.

As they talked Castiel played with the long waves falling over the boys face, "I'm no long bound to my mission, Dean doesn't have to ask for help I'm going to give it."

Sam wanted to believe him but life had let them both down too many times, "Really Cas? We tried stabbing him and Dean shot him right in the head but he came back."

"Yes Sam no holding back, we will find a way to kill Dick Roman and rescue Dean, tomorrow we go right to Dick Roman and get him home, I'll do anything for you and your brother, I love you both."

…..

Dean opened his eyes and looked around; he didn't know where he was. Dick Roman was sitting next to him along with the nurse. He sat up and realized they were moving, "Where am I?"

Dick held up his drink, "Wonderful you're awake, Dean you're on my private jet. I'm taking you somewhere warm to recuperate."

Dean was on a cot, he slowly rolled on his side to look out the window, they were in the air and Dean panicked, "No bring me back!"

"Dean relax, I'm taking you to my island…I call it "Roman Island" Dick finished his drink and held up the glass for another, a woman hurried over to refill it.

Dick grinned at Dean and gave him a wink, "Oh I know it's not original but if you think of something better let me know Dean and I'll change it."

Dean was becoming frantic as the fog started, " I have to get back to Sam, I know he wouldn't leave me!"

Daphne filled a syringe and approached Dean, "You have to relax Dean, you're healing and I can't have you ripping open those tender spots."

Another body guard grabbed his arms and held him as she sunk the needle in.

Dick snapped, "Leave me alone with him."

After the door closed Dick kneeled next to the sleeping boy and kissed his slack mouth, "Dean I missed you." He ran his hands everywhere examining the damage, "I killed them all for you."

He slipped a hand between Deans legs, "No one will ever touch you there again except me now. I was wrong to let you go…I can't love, you know that but if I could it would be you and of course Henry."

A tear slid down Dean's cheek as somewhere inside him he heard the monster talking. A long tongue flicked out and licked the tear away.

TBC


	28. Busted Beauty

Castiel stood outside the mansion, "Sam it's sealed off to angels, the entire place is locked down."

Sam grabbed his hand, "Come on there has to be a way in." As they were searching a groundskeeper came over, "If you're looking for Mister Roman he left with his young man."

Sam pulled out his wallet and showed the groundskeeper a photo of Dean, "Was this the guy?"

"Oh yes, I wouldn't forget that face…terrible thing about him with those infirmities of his."

Castiel grabbed the man's shoulders and growled, "What are you talking about?"

He looked around nervously, "I really shouldn't be talking about this"

Sam pleaded with the old man, "It's my brother, if you got a heart at all you'll share what you know."

The man looked at those hazel eyes and gave in, "Alright then follow me," he brought them both to the caretakers shack and shut the door then pulled the curtain shut on the grimy little window.

"Well that poor boy came here in an ambulance, I heard he was in the hospital quite awhile you know after those men got him. They did some terrible things…well that's what the maid said. The boy was ruined, left for dead in a ditch or something like that."

Sam's eyes filled with tears, "What do you mean ruined?"

"I don't know lad your pretty young to hear about these things."

"He's my brother I have right to know what happened!"

"All right if you really want to know I mean ruined inside…tore up."

Castiel was feeling a rage building in side of him, part of it was aimed at himself, "Where is he now?"

" Mister Roman packed him up along with that bodyguard Henry and a nurse named Daphne. Honestly that's all I know."

The caretaker looked at the boy and could see the pain he was feeling, "I wish I could help you more. I'd let you in but…well if Mister Roman found out he would have my head literally. That and the fact the place is still filled with his people."

He twisted his ball cap in his weathered hands, "They aren't like us you know, I hear things but I've never seen one up close…I know they feed on us but once you work here you aren't allowed to go."

There was a knock on the door, and the man paled, "You both best leave now."

Castiel grabbed Sam and vanished.

An assistant to Dick Roman walked in and looked around, "Seamus who was that…the man and boy and where did they go?"

"They vanished sir; I told them nothing…please don't tell mister Roman."

He placed a comforting hand on the old man's shoulder, "Seamus I wouldn't think of disturbing mister Roman when he is spending time with his busted up whore."

Seamus gave him a nervous smile and nodded, "Oh thank you s…"

Seamus never got to finish his sentence.

….

Sam was so desperate that as the weeks went by he tried the numbers in his dads old address book looking for help but the people listed either had disconnected numbers or were dead.

He called Rick as a last resort but Little John said he disappeared and the man claimed to have no knowledge of hunters or anything else for that matter. He said John's Impala was safe and Sam shouldn't worry.

Castiel had killed to escape; he was considered a renegade now. Even Gabriel wasn't answering him. It was the angel and Sam against the world and the only ones able to find Dean.

….

The plane landed on the private air strip, Dean was wheeled out still groggy from the shot and brought to a massive bedroom with doors opening onto the beach and a stunning view of the water.

Henry lifted him into bed rolling Dean on his side as Daphne came in to check him over, Dick Roman was sitting there in shorts and a t shirt checking his phone and glancing up to be sure everything was done correctly.

Later Dean slowly woke up, the drugs still making every movement sluggish and clumsy. He hung onto furniture and when he ran out of things to hold onto he started to fall until Dick caught him.

"Hey beautiful what are you doing up?"

Dean frowned as he stared out the glass doors open to the water, the warm breeze was blowing in causing the sheer white curtains to billow and sway, "Where am I…what did you do?"

Dick treated him gently, he knew there was no escaping now and the threats were no longer necessary, "Dean you're on my island, you're going to live here now. Don't you remember?"

Dean had bits and pieces floating through his mind of the last several weeks but the blow to the head and drugs made it all fuzzy, "I…I don't know."

Dick kissed his scarred hand, "Baby, Sam left you, he went to live with that angel remember? I tried to find him to tell Sam I found you and when I did Castiel answered. Dean they are lovers now, I didn't want to say anything and hurt your feelings but they don't want you anymore."

"No!"

"Dean you don't know anything, your damaged goods and they can both be happy together…they want me to keep you Dean you're not right in the head you have to feel that."

Dean's vision blurred then cleared again, "No Cas wouldn't take Sam away…they would look for me and Cas wouldn't fuck my brother!"

"Dean you need rest now you're acting like a selfish brat over this. Sam deserves a good life and that isn't with an invalid."

Dean tried to make a fist but his hand was too weak, "I hate you…liar, they love me."

Dick spoke to him like a child, "Well I think you should just get some rest, I'll have Daphne bring you a snack and then a pill to help you sleep."

…..

Dean ate the meal but when she gave him the pill he pretended to swallow it the flushed it after she left.

He sat there the rest of the day thinking about Sam and Castiel leaving him and worse them becoming lovers. He didn't know what to believe, Dean wasn't functioning well and sorting things out became a tiring event.

There was a part of him that knew Dick Roman was lying to him if only he could remember more about his time in the city and past events it all would have become clear.

Dean stared down at the keychain in his hand, _"Sammy you and Cas wouldn't leave me…run away together…leave me to die."_

…

As time went by with no help coming for him Dean fell into a deep depression and ate little, he slept most of the time unless Dick was there to force him to the beach or make him eat. As far as Dean was concerned there was little hope and without it he had nothing to live for.

….

Even with Dean off the radar, Sam and Castiel never stopped looking and spent the rest of the time trying to find the best way to kill Dick Roman when they did finally get the monster.

In between it all Castiel made Sam go to school, study and have a little normalcy. He did everything he thought Dean would want him to do for Sam.

Sam refused to celebrate holidays and they passed with no fanfare until Sam's thirteenth birthday.

The angel decided to do something special for him.

Sam came home and dropped his backpack, stripped down and showered like he did every afternoon. Next was homework while the angel cooked supper for them, tonight though was all of Sam's favorites.

Castiel sat there smiling as Sam shoveled in the food, he was growing tall, filling out but still all arms and legs. Puberty was hitting Sam hard and it was easy to see the large, handsome man waiting to emerge given the time.

Sam paused and looked at the angel, "What?"

"Well it's your birthday today."

"So?"

"Dean would want you to acknowledge it just like we did for his."

"I don't deserve to enjoy anything, I can't find Dean." Sam looked down at the food and realized it was his favorite and the angel went out of his way to make things special.

Sam forced a smile, "Its great Cas really I appreciate it." Sam kept on eating and the angel's feelings were hurt. He slid the wrapped book over to Sam, "Happy birthday Sam."

Castiel got up and put on his coat, "Perhaps I will take a walk and let you do your homework…I made a cake but…"

Sam grabbed his hand, "No don't leave me. I Already did my homework and I don't want to be alone Cas."

"Very well Sam."

They sat together as Sam became more animated, chatting about school, his plans for when Dean came home. Sam talked about missing Dean's birthday and how being seventeen now he must be doing all sorts of exciting things.

Castiel knew Sam was creating a little world for Dean that didn't exist but he nodded and smiled allowing the boy to live in his fantasy.

Afterward they had cake and ice cream, Sam let go of everything and was happy at least with the angel . Tomorrow morning would be all for Dean but for tonight he wanted to please Castiel.

Sam was confused once the angel came back, Dean was Sam's everything, the reason Sam lived and moved forward but now found he loved to watch the beings body move graceful and strong. There was no denying the being was attractive but it was more than that, his sweet, awkward ways and the sheer power fascinated Sam and made him want more.

Sam thought of the blue eyes in class or a lucky glimpse of him naked and Sam would became painfully erect. Puberty and hormones raging he began to have dark thoughts about his angel.

Now here he was on the big bed across from Castiel while the angel fed him cake, "Is it good Sam?"

"Yeah it's very good." Sam ran his finger through the frosting and held it out to Castiel, "Suck it off and find out."

Castiel knew where it was all going, "Sam I can't you are too young and Dean…."

Sam blushed now feeling embarrassed, "It's ok Cas still I love you."

….

Dean had healed for the most part by spring, he still had the headaches and tremors. He also didn't feel right inside and had no desire for sex, the emotion scars remained and his mind was still a fog part of the time but once in awhile clarity poked through the blackness and Dean was able to remember, comprehend his situation fully and he thought that was the worst.

Remembering Sam's birthday was an example where that clarity brought pain, he was missing the most important day in the world and there wasn't anything Dean could do about it.

Dean was grateful that Dick Roman left the island for stretches at a time and that the man didn't pressure Dean for intercourse because he didn't think he was able to perform.

Dean had searched the house and grounds over and over looking for a way home, a way to contact Sam but he was given no internet access or phone. The equipment was locked away where even Dean couldn't pick the lock or break in as hard as he tried.

The staff were all afraid of Dick Roman and in turn Henry who did everything his employer asked of him. None of them wanted to vanish like others that came to the island after accepting work.

When any of them saw Dean Winchester approaching they went the other way or refused to speak unless necessary leaving the teenager without anyone to help him.

….

On night Dean heard Henry crying out in pain, Dean pushed the door open slightly to the playroom and saw the man tied up to spreader bars as Dick forced himself dry into the Henry's body.

Dean felt it was his fault, that Henry was getting the frustration and anger Dick Roman was feeling toward not being able to have what he wanted.

"Henry you're making noises like a weak bitch you should be used to this by now…I do this because I care about you." Dick pushed harder then reached around and played with the man.

Henry gasped at the new pain, "Richard no more…I can't take it." His head dropped back and Dean watched Dicks tongue lick away the tears seeming to feed off the agony.

Even though Dean knew Henry had done awful things for Dick there was something tragic about him that made Dean hate him less than he had in the past. A weight and sadness followed the man everywhere he went and now seeing this he wondered how often during his young life scenes like this occurred.

Dean went to leave and the floor squeaked, Dick whipped his head around and smiled, "Dean do you like to watch? You can join us…come on in."

Dean moved as fast as he was able back to his room leaving the screams and laughter behind him.

….

The library was two stories and extensive with a balcony running in a circular shape around the room. Dean read books on spells, botanicals, animals, growing herbs, there were even books on monsters and demons. All of them were from the former owners each one leaving more and more until the collection was massive.

Dean also drew pictures, Dean was no artist but he tried to draw Sam and Castiel and they turned out terrible but it was all he had to remember them by as his only photo of Sam disappeared out of his wallet.

Sometimes Dean was occupied with swimming in the warm clean waters with Dick and later they lay there together naked in the sun as the man touched every inch wanting Dean but each time he checked, rolling Dean on his stomach and opening him he seemed tender.

On this particular day after swimming Dick lazily ran his tongue over Deans hole probing and pushing, Dean tensed and tried to get up but he felt the arms pinning him to the sand.

"Dean pretty soon I'm going to start having sex with you again, I have been more than patient. Poor Henry is twenty six now and wearing out on me. If it hurts remember I care for you Dean. You were the best investment I ever made besides Henry."

…..

Dean wasn't sure of himself or his body anymore and felt his dependence on Dick Roman growing by the day.

Sometimes Dean would need help eating when his hands shook too much, Dick fed him with one hand and fondled Dean with the other. Food even started to become a negative to Dean and he began losing weight.

Food and sex went hand in hand for Dean and he wanted nothing to do with any of it.

…

Henry watched Dean trying to close the cap on the toothpaste, it was something the boy had done a thousand times before but this time it was impossible. Henry did it for him and watched Deans face flush with embarrassment.

"Sorry…I have trouble sometimes."

"Its fine sir, I'm here to help."

TBC


	29. Do You Love Me

Sam insisted on cramming his long, gawky frame in the tiny bed with the angel every night and every night the angel relented getting the large bed with Sam after the boy made it a miserably tight fit in Castiels.

They lay together with the lamp on as Sam read the Greek mythology book Castiel had given him for his last birthday.

Castiel loved to listen to Sam's gentle deepening voice with the occasional crack as he read the stories out loud.

Sam finished his chapter and closed the book then shut off the lamp, "Goodnight Cas…I love you."

Since his birthday Sam had started telling the angel that each night, he missed Dean terribly and had no one else he loved or trusted so he gave all the pent up emotions to Castiel.

"I love you too Sam, very much now get some sleep. You only have a few weeks of school left and they we can travel more together to find Dean."

Every day after Sam left and many times into the night Castiel searched alone for Dean but Sam wanted to be a part of the process so when the weekend came they looked together.

The pair searched for a sign, a break in the block put on Dean but they couldn't find one.

….

Sunday they came back again to the little apartment without Dean, failure hung in the room like a dark cloud for Sam but the angel always tried to make it better.

Castiel wasn't funny or romantic, he wasn't a being made for small talk but he tried his best to make Sam smile. That night he sat and watched a Godzilla movie with the boy even though he didn't understand what was happening.

They laid together sharing some doughnuts and the angel listened to the boy laugh and point out the cheesy acting. He nodded and smiled at the right times and Sam never noticed Castiels confusion. Sam did notice how hard he tried and that meant the world to a kid without much to hope for.

It was an impulsive, hormonal teenager that kissed Castiel that night. He crawled on top and pressed his mouth onto the angels trying to push in his tongue.

Castiel lifted him off and covered him up then moved back to his little bed by the window. He watched the figure of Sam sitting in the dark and he knew the boy was crying, "Sam you miss Dean, I know you did things with him but you can't with me."

"You tell me why not Cas…it's going on a year without Dean and it doesn't mean I don't love him. I'm not a little kid anymore and I don't like anyone else. I trust you."

"That is exactly why I won't do anything with you Sam, because you trust me."

Sam got up and pulled on his jeans, "You said you don't follow rules anymore, well I say you're full of shit. You kissed Dean and he had sex with you but I'm not good enough?"

"Sam that's not it…"

"No that is it, I'm not anything like him. I'm not handsome or funny I get it but you can make me feel good even though I'm not Dean!"

The problem for the angel was Sam was funny, handsome and so much more. Castiel saw the changes every day and could tell that Sam was going to end up as beautiful as his brother.

He found himself overprotective of his charge, touching him for no reason and living off the smile he could bring to the dimpled, sweet face.

Sam was a walking statue waiting to finish forming. He had a sharp wit, a clever mind and all the trappings to make a wonderful man.

"Sam don't go out, it's late and I worry."

"Give me a reason to stay."

Castiel got up and went back to the large bed, "Come back and I'll hold you."

Sam never had any intention of leaving; he shucked off his pants and jumped into bed hugging the angel tight. "What do think about me…be honest Cas, do you love me?"

Sam I do love you, I think you're beautiful and smart…so smart that you seem much older than you are and sometimes I forget that you are a child."

"I'm not a child I'm a teenager."

"You are smart enough to know what I mean, I have feelings for you. Is that what you want to hear?"

Sam had gotten part of what he wanted, "Yeah, sometimes I don't think much of myself."

Castiel shifted his hips away from Sam so they weren't fully touching, "Well then I'll think enough of you for both of us."

Sam smiled and pressed his face against the warm skin enjoying the familiar fingers tracing circles on his back.

"Sam I know what Dick Roman is."

"What?"

"A Leviathan, I wanted to be sure before I told you. If we know what something is then we have a way to kill it."

"Yeah but I stabbed him and Dean shot him, Dick came back . How do you kill something like that?"

"We can work on that together but tomorrow is school, are you ready to sleep for me now?"

"Yes…thanks."

"For what?"

"For watching out for me, for giving a damn what happens to us."

…..

Dean sat next to Dick at the table on the beach, the tremors started as he lifted the spoon to his mouth. Dean paused taking a breath then continued not wanting to look weak in front of him. Dean knew what happened to weak people when it came to Dick Roman.

Dick watched him closely and wondered how bad off he really was, normally with an infirmity it meant Dean would have been let go or put down but there was something stopping Dick Roman from discarding him.

Dean felt the man's cool fingers rubbing his thigh, Dean was naked by his request and shivered, "I…I don't know if I'm ready."

"Dean you have had months to recover and I think you are, I'll use lots of lubricant. Now stop whining because it's going to happen."

Dean couldn't eat anymore; he sat there quietly and tried to remember Sam. Kissing Sam and hugging him, Sam telling Dean he loved him.

The angel entered his mind then, lying on the bed staring up at Dean frightened as he took him but willing to give no matter what. Dean recalled the first time Castiel told Dean he loved him, all those memories held Dean together like a bandage.

Dean took a deep breath and stood up, "Alright I can do this, I'll pretend it's Cas or Sammy."

Dick smiled then reached over and patted his rear, "That's the spirit, nothing like role play to spice things up in the bedroom. Sometimes I pretend Henry is thirteen again," Dick touched the man's face as they walked by, "don't I Henry?"

Henry closed his eyes and stopped himself from punching his employer, "Yes sir and sometimes I pretend you're human."

Dick stopped in his tracks and turned around, "Ouch! Henry you're so brave today, if I had feelings they would be hurt."

Henry snapped, "Well I suppose you're lucky you don't have any."

Dick slapped him across the face sending the man reeling into the table, "We can talk about your attitude later but now I have a date with Dean."

Dean was frozen in place, he didn't know what to do next. Henry held his face and slowly got up, straightened the table and walked away quietly knowing he pay dearly but still felt a satisfaction for standing up to Dick Roman even if just a little.

…..

"Go on Dean, be a good boy for me."

Dean walked ahead to the bedroom dutifully and got on the bed spreading his legs. Dick shucked off his shorts and climbed between Dean's thighs getting ready but then Dean asked a peculiar question.

"Do you love me?"

It was a simple question posed in a childlike voice but Dick Roman was thrown off by it.

He got up and sat next to Dean, "No…no I don't. I don't love anyone but if I could it would be you and of course Henry."

It was Dick Romans line he used first Henry when he was thirteen and now Dean, it was supposed to make Dean feel special but it only made him sick.

Dean was trembling again and he held his hands tightly together hoping Dick wouldn't notice, "I only ask because Sam and Cas love me and I miss them a lot."

Dick rolled his eyes and sighed, "Really Dean do I have to hear all of this again?"

Dean looked up at him and spoke from the heart, "I feel different since those men did that stuff, my heads not right and I think Cas could fix me. If you don't love me then what good am I to you…even if they don't want me right now maybe they will if I get better."

"Don't be stupid Dean, of course you can't." He pushed Dean on his stomach suddenly enraged by Dean's questions and Henrys sudden backbone.

Dick oiled his fingers and pushed two inside rubbing and feeling the healed spots, Dean hid his face into the pillow and started crying asking him to stop.

"Dean you know I hate that crying, let me play awhile. Would you like that?"

He mumbled, "No you're hurting me."

Dick curled his fingers and found it, when Dean tightened and shivered he nuzzled the boy's neck as he rubbed quickly, "Now that feels good doesn't…are you going to come for me Dean?"

Dean lifted his head and gasped, "Not for you…Sam." He thrust his cock into the mattress and shot across the sheets crying his brother's name.

Dick immediately mounted him stretching and straining his body, Dean cried out for help, begging for the angel that never came to save him.

…..

Castiel and Sam hit every dead end and were denied help from sources they thought they could trust. Dean was cloaked and there was no finding him.

They weren't sure how Dick Roman was keeping him that way but they never gave up on Dean. They tried spells, ritual blood work, and even considered darker means to find Dean. Sam in desperation suggested a demons help but Castiel refused to get Sam involved in something that dangerous.

….

That night Sam went through the books and pulled out the mythology book again, he curled up next to Castiel and started reading the trials of Hercules. He read the first trial as the angel listened smiling to himself and enjoying Sam's voice as always but when Sam started to read the second trial that was when it all became clear.

"Each time Hercules cut off one of the hydra's heads, Iolaus held a torch to the headless tendons of the neck. The cauterization prevented the regeneration of new heads, and finally, Hercules had the better of the beast."

Sam slammed the book shut and locked eyes with Castiel, they both smiled as Sam yelled, "That's it! That's how we kill him, Cas we tried to kill him like a person but he's not human."

They embraced each other, "Sam we cut off the beasts head when he is most vulnerable and burn the stump and stop him from regenerating. It will take more than an ordinary flame to stop him but I know what will. Leave that part up to me."

They locked eyes and this time when Sam climbed on top of him the angel allowed it letting Sam grasp him and slide over his body until they both came together.

Afterward there was deep shame on the angel's part but Sam's hormones were sated and he cuddled happily up to Castiel.

He held Sam and stroked the long, soft tawny waves until the boys breathing became regular and the familiar soft snoring started.

The angel stared at the crack in the ceiling the rest of the night trying to forget the fact there was no way back from what they had just done.

…

The next morning Sam was up early cooking breakfast, "Cas come on its gonna get cold." The angel got up and sat at the table staring at the overcooked eggs and burnt toast, "Sam it looks…wonderful."

He ate as Sam watched; the angel smiled and gave him thumbs up as Dean had taught him. Sam grinned and dug in seemingly impervious to his own terrible cooking.

Sam's face was bright and happy for once, "Ok so we find Dean and kill Dick then the three of us get the car and leave this city forever."

Castiel paused in mid bite, "You want me to come with you and Dean?"

"Yeah sure of course."

The angel hung his head not able to meet the hazel eyes, "Sam I think things about you I shouldn't. There's something wrong with me."

Sam reached out and touched his hand, "I liked what we did, I wanted to do it and I don't feel bad but there are things I wouldn't do with you unless Dean said I could. Dean is my boyfriend."

"I know Sam, and you're his…I won't get in the way I promise but we need to find him, that is the most important thing."

"Cas lets go back to Dicks house and I'll go in and remove the sigils so you can go inside. I know there has to be clues but how can we get past the staff?"

"I have an idea Sam."

TBC


	30. Sliver Of Light

Sam dressed and packed his gear ready for the trip to the mansion, "We can do this Cas, I know we can save Dean."

Castiel looked into the bright, hazel eyes and wanted to kiss him but Sam thought of it first. They were both clumsy but the kiss was passionate, Castiel broke away.

"Sam let's bring our Dean back home."

"Sam nodded, "I want our family back together."

Castiel hugged Sam and they vanished heading for the mansion to look for clues.

….

Dean climbed the stairs to the second story of the massive library; he was working his way through shelf by shelf trying to find anything to help him contact his brother or the angel or to kill Dick Roman.

Dean never had access to computers, he begged Dick just to let him email Sam so his brother knew he was alive but that ended with Dick spanking Dean for being a bad little boy.

Dean pointed out he wasn't little or especially bad but offered to carve Dick up with a kitchen knife and show the monster how bad he could be.

Dick only laughed and spanked him some more telling Dean how much he loved the teen's sense of humor.

When Dick flew out on business Dean would ask to go with him but he wasn't allowed. A prisoner in a pretty cage, Dean started to think of killing himself but he knew Sam and Castiel were out there waiting and he couldn't let them down. Despite what Dick told him Dean believed they could still want him even though he was physically and mentally different than how they last saw him.

….

One night Dean spied at Henry's door and saw him talking to Dick, "Richard this island…you and I…"

"You and I what Henry, what stupid thing were you about to say?"

Henry bravely pushed forward, "You and I could start over here…no more killing or pain. You could try to change you're stuck here and is this is it for you. Eternity is a long time to be so evil."

"What do I do when you die; I'm supposed to be good all alone? I'm not evil Henry I am a leviathan, you know I'm superior to your world full of cattle." Dean watched Dick Roman stroking Henry with his long, cool fingers and Dean shuddered.

He knew what it felt like, sometimes the monsters hand was clammy like he just stepping out of cold water. It was enough to make Dean vomit afterward but Henry closed his eyes and tried to enjoy it.

"You know Henry I thought of having one of us replace you but then it wouldn't really be my Henry so you're going to age and die…actually I would eat you when you got too old."

Henry rolled his head on the pillow and opened his eyes, "What do you consider old?"

"Thirty but I'd give you until fifty, if you maintain yourself you should still be fuckable until then. I think you need to jog more, stay fit like me."

Henry knew when he was being baited and ignored him, "Richard let Dean Winchester go the boy is not right anymore, he needs help and you don't care about him."

Dick stopped stroking him and sat up, "Are you cheating on me…are you fucking him?"

Henry tensed, "No of course not, I wouldn't do that to him. I've been faithful to you I promise. I just watch that poor kid limping around here in a fog…."

"Oh you are breaking my heart now Henry, get over it." He rolled the young man over and lifted his hips, "Time to play bitch." He pulled out a black box and set it on the bed, "You talk a lot so let's see if you're up for a little screaming."

Dean braced himself on the wall and worked his way back to his room as Henry's cries echoed down the hall.

…..

That night he had a dream, a summoning spell for Castiel but when he woke up he realized that nothing would work as long as the angel couldn't hear him but Dean was determined to try anyway.

Dean sat on the floor enjoying the solitude of the library, he steadied his hand and drew out the sigils needed then wrote a list of ingredients. He wasn't sure how he would do it, without Sam and Castiel his only way out was death if this didn't work.

Every day his resolve to stay alive weakened.

…

Dick sat on the beach with Dean both of them naked wearing only a pair of sunglasses each. He took Dean by the shoulders and put him on his back, "You're so beautiful Dean, I used to love that cocky fight you had in you but since your…well.."

Dean blurted out what they both knew, "Brain damage, I can't hold a fucking spoon without shaking, I'm a god damn invalid."

Dick Roman gave him that big, shark like smile, "I like you pliable and easy now, I can have you when I want to so cheer up pretty boy."

Dean turned away from him, "I know you killed boys before. You're gonna get sick of me, find me boring and then tear me up. If you ever want to do that would you give me back to Cas and Sam instead?"

"Dean I don't think I'll get sick of you ever…if I do you can be like Henry, I found myself having a weakness for him so that's why he's still alive."

Dean found some of his old sass and snorted, "I wouldn't call it living, Henry fucking hates you."

"That's where you're wrong, he loves me. I'm his owner and he couldn't do without me anymore. He's become…oh I think you describe it as institutionalized, Henry is my bitch."

Henry was standing there holding the phone, he held it out with a shaking hand, anger in his voice, "Phone call for you Mister Roman, is there any other bitch work you need done?"

Dick put his hand over the phone and winked at the man, "Take the rest of the afternoon off Henry, go do something fun!"

Dean watched Henry walk away with slumped shoulders, only in his mid twenties Henry carried invisible weights on him like a man much older. The pain in his walk was evident and Dean didn't think Henry knew what fun was anymore.

…

While Dick Roman was busy Dean followed the man into the house curious as to what he was going to do. Dean had no outlets or contact except for the people that worked for Dick Roman so any distraction was welcome.

Henry went in his room and Dean spied from a crack in the door, the man stripped naked and grabbed a towel, he stood examining himself in the mirror. His fingers traveled over the shades of bruising then the hand went to his lower back and pressed.

Henry sucked in a breath and his face filled with pain as he explored further, finally he braced his arms on the dresser and started to cry.

Dean was shocked at the state of his body, from his neck to his thighs it was a road map of old abuses.

Henry was built beautifully like a statue, every muscle cut and lean, faded scars ran over the sun kissed skin showing lighter against the tan coloring. There were burn marks and other injuries Dean couldn't identify.

Dean let out a gasp, Henry frowned in the mirror and turned to the door, "Who's there?"

Dean pressed himself against the wall but a hand shot out and grabbed him yanking him into the bedroom, Henry growled, "Why are you spying on me?"

"I'm not…well yeah I guess I am."

He let Dean go and realized he was naked, Henry wrapped the towel around himself and headed for the bathroom embarrassed by his body, "I hope you got a good look at your future."

"Hey wait can we talk?"

Henry stopped letting out a sigh, "No not now, tomorrow when Mister Roman goes on business."

…

Dick Roman rolled over early that morning and pushed Dean's legs open, it was a ritual now. He woke up at 5 am, opened Dean's legs and fucked him.

Dean laid there with his eyes staring vacantly at the vaulted ceiling as his body was jostled like a ragdoll, his fight was gone now and anything that was pleasurable about sex had left Dean a long time ago.

Dick would sometimes make it hurt and other times if Dean was lucky he would feel a tongue lapping at him like an eager lizard, probing and stretching him open first.

Dick lost his squeamishness for hygiene and took Dean anytime he wanted but mornings were a must.

…

"Rise and shine Dean time to set daddy's tone for the day."

Dean grabbed his legs and pulled them back, "Ok but I'm pretty tender, can you use lube please?"

"Dean you're so polite, turn over and let me look at you, all fours." Dean got on all fours and spread his knees, he felt fingers touching and pressing, "You look sore so I'll be nice and let you heal up, give me a blow job."

Dean immediately turned and started sucking getting it done as quickly as possible; Dick pumped into his mouth and started talking. Dean hated listening to him.

"You suck like a champ Dean…a good doggie aren't you? Come on bring me home little boy…harder…almost there…yes come on!" He slammed against him cutting Deans lip on his teeth and emptied then shoved him back on the bed.

"Heal up that ass by tomorrow night."

Dean touched his lip and looked at the blood on his fingers, "Yes…sir."

Dick Roman dressed carefully after his shower, "I have a very important meeting today Dean, wish me luck." Dean was still sitting there with his head down, blood drying on his mouth.

"I wish your plane would crash."

Dick turned around and lifted his face, "Oh baby I'm sorry about that, your face is the only thing I don't want to damage."

He reached over and opened the nightstand pulling out Dean's notebook with his drawings and spell and tossed it in his face.

Dean's heart sank, all his hard work and careful planning was for nothing. It took him weeks to research and painstakingly write out what he needed. He clutched the notebook to his chest and a tremor began.

"By the way I know about your little hobby, don't try to leave or contact anyone Dean." Dick Roman tapped his chin and smiled, "You know what, go for it, you're sealed off. I'll show you what happens when you think outside of the box little man. Tomorrow night…be ready for it."

…...

Sam and Castiel were outside the mansion, the angel was able to easily get them on the grounds but that was as far as he could go. Sam carefully taped a panel on the glass then cut the alarm wires leading inside. He took the rock and slammed it into the pane and it crackled, stuck to the duct tape to minimize the noise.

He slipped his arm in and unlocked the window then climbed inside, before he left Sam grabbed Castiel and kissed him, "Wish me luck Cas."

Castiel looked around the window with blue eyes full of worry, "Sam how will I know if you succeeded?"

"Sam kissed him again and grinned, "You're gonna be able to get in silly."

…

Sam started checking for sigils that would keep the angel out then began spray painting them, many were cleverly hidden but Sam found them, "Psssst…Cas come on."

Castiel appeared as Sam ransacked the desk in the study; he picked the locks on the cabinets and rummaged through papers and books. Castiel stood there examining a map framed on the wall, "Sam where is this?" He pointed to a little island in the middle of nowhere, there was a smiley face drawn next to it in red marker.

Sam was cramming his backpack with papers and glanced over, I don't know Cas we don't have a lot of time, take it down, pull it from the frame and put in with the rest."

…..

Dean sat in the tub of warm water and held up the razor, he tried to gather up the courage to get on with it. He was sure Sam wasn't coming, Castiel was gone and Dick Roman was going to punish him tomorrow night.

He thought of Henry's body and the years of pain the man endured, Dean decided he didn't want to live like that.

Dean thought about the tremors, missing pieces of his life and the difficulty with tasks that should have been easy. He knew there was something very wrong with him and as his eighteenth birthday approached Dean figured maybe it was his time to check out and see what the other side had to offer hoping when he got there at least he could see Castiel.

Dean wasn't afraid of dying he was now afraid of living. He held the razor against his wrist pushing the edge in.

He watched almost fascinated as the thin ribbon of blood hit the water and blossomed but then his hand trembled so badly the blade fell, he screamed in pure frustration until Henry ran in.

"What are you doing you little fool?!"

Henry snatched the razor off the floor and dropped it in the sink; he knelt by the tub and grabbed Dean's wrists, "What the fuck is wrong with you? You have a chance!"

Dean struggled but it was no use, "What chance? Do you how long it's been? No one is coming for me, I hope to god Cas is taking care of Sam…I hope he loves him like I do. That's all I care about anymore, Sammy needs a chance and it isn't with me."

Henry was desperately trying to lift Dean, "Get out…get out of that tub right now."

Henry jerked him up, he managed to get Dean out then toweled him off. Henry scooped him up like Dean weighed nothing and brought him to the bed dropping him on the mattress.

Dean was crying now, he spread his legs knowing the drill with Dick Roman and looked up at him, "So what Henry, you wanna rape me too?"

"Dean I could care less about raping you, so talk…what did you want to talk about?"

Henry carefully wrapped Dean's wrist and taped it then rubbed the boys back waiting for him to start talking.

Dean hugged the pillow and gathered the courage to speak, "How long have you been with Dick, are you a monster like him?"

"If I start telling you things he's going to find out."

"Not if I don't tell him."

Henry sat down and looked around nervously, "I'm not a leviathan just a human. He's had me since I was thirteen…I'm…I guess I'm twenty six maybe, I don't know he keeps track of that for me."

"That's a good chunk of your life."

"I didn't have much of one to begin with Dean, drunk mother…no father. I lived in a shithole and thought my way out was education. I was the good boy, worked hard even though mom didn't give a crap, I was going to dig my way out Dean."

"What happened?"

"Dick Roman happened, I was taken on the way to school…I remember the hood over my head, the drive to the mansion and then money exchanged. I never saw mom again but I suppose I was just traded up to a bigger monster."

Henrys face was twisted in pain and his eyes were lost in a memory, he kept talking as if Dean wasn't there.

"All my work was for nothing, I wasn't allowed outside or any contact with other people. The first time he raped me I fought him, I bit and scratched, kicked and punched but after awhile I realized it was going to happen no matter what and I gave in."

Henry wiped his eyes and continued, "He didn't put me with the others, I was the one that got to stay in the house. The only lover I've ever had was Richard; he was fiercely protective of me when I was younger and after a time it seemed flattering."

Dean noticed his voice soften, "I was important then, I saw him kill a man at one of his parties for touching me. Richard said he wished he could love me, for awhile I felt special even when he hurt me. Dean when it's all you know it becomes normal."

Dean felt like he was going to cry, "Damn Henry he burned you, how is that normal?!"

"When you're that young, when someone has you for years and even though you know it's wrong you become dependent…you wouldn't understand Dean. You have people that love you."

Dean grabbed him desperately, "Please just kill him, haven't you tried?"

He laughed bitterly, "You don't think I have? Poison, stabbing, I shot him once… Dean he can't be killed. I gave up, I'm a coward really and I have other personal reasons I won't discuss…it's all very painful."

Dean felt the fog start to come in, he couldn't fully understand Henry's story, "You seem like a good guy so how the hell do you rationalize the things you do for him?"

Henry was starting to shut down now, "I've done the clean up, I make things go away after Mister Roman has his pleasures. I'm a bad person Dean, I'm not proud of it but my sense of survival is strong. It's a "them or me" mentality that helped me live this long."

"Come on Henry we can both escape, I know if we work together we can do it."

Henry got up and straightened his tie, "No…sorry, there is no way out for me."

Dean grabbed his belt, "I'll do anything."

"Dean if I wanted to fuck you I would have done it already. I'm not in good shape anymore for intimacy, I'm two holes for Mister Roman to use and that's all."

He walked to the door then stopped and looked back, "One thing…Mister Roman can cloak the island but anything beyond that? Not possible, he can't control the water Dean."

He walked out and shut the door leaving Dean to mull over the clues he just left for him.

TBC


	31. The Prayerful Tears

Sam and Castiel worked their way through the maze of rooms level by level looking for information that could help them save Dean.

They found one room off the bedroom he shared with Dean that looked promising; Sam found the silent alarm and disabled it then opened the locks.

There it was Dick Romans office. Sam spotted the computer and began trying to crack the information hidden inside.

The angel watched him working furiously, "Sam, take the entire computer, he's going to know that we were here so it doesn't matter."

The pair ransacked the office taking anything that might be helpful because they only had one shot and this was it.

Castiel looked over a map tacked to the wall and noticed a smiley face drawn on it, "Sam should I take this map?" Sam glanced up, "Sure Cas pull it down and put it with the pile of folders and the computer."

They heard the footsteps of the maid in the bedroom changing the linens, Dick Roman insisted on it done daily even if he wasn't there. Sam froze and whispered, "Cas can you get me and all of that out of…"

Before Sam could finish they were back at the apartment with the pile, he looked down at the files, loose papers, map and the computer. He was shaking from adrenaline and went to hold the angel.

"Sam you're trembling."

"I know it was so close Cas I thought we were going to get caught, you are incredible."

"Thank you Sam I appreciate that, now let's find Dean," the angels eyes shimmered with tears, "I miss him so much Sam, he was my only true lover and I…"

He looked at Sam's expression of hurt and immediately stopped talking. Castiel wasn't sure if the look meant that he was upset over Dean having sex with the angel or because he allow Sam to sleep with him and felt left out but either way Cas wondered what would happen when they were all reunited.

He decided it didn't matter; he was more than willing to step back and let them have each other.

The angel's main focus was saving Dean and nothing short of getting him home and killing Dick Roman would satisfy Castiel.

….

Castiel went through all the papers as Sam worked on cracking the rest of the computer files. He found a trail of horrible deeds Dick Roman had done but not much about Dean.

There were emails and receipts from an architect, several contractors and security companies Sam found interesting.

Castiel pulled out the map again examining it closer, "Sam is there such a place as "Roman Island?"

Sam started typing and pulled up a place with the same coordinates, "Malo Island which basically means "morally bad" ok that has to be Roman Island he must have bought it or stole from someone."

Sam grabbed the map and pointed to the smiley face, "What sick fuck!"

An hour later Sam and Castiel thought they had it all, every company and property owned by Dick Roman, now they just had to start the search.

…..

Henry was settled in his life with Dick Roman, if he had been truthful with Dean he would have told him that he loved the creature and hated him just as much.

Dick Roman was handsome, powerful and charismatic, his secret side came out on the rare occasions he was romantic with Henry, preparing special dinners, exotic trips and surprised him with expensive gifts.

None of that mattered to Henry but on the rare occasion Dick Roman was tender with him that was what kept the broken young man going. Henry had been with the creature for so long that he didn't know anything else.

The creature became his father, abuser, lover, employer and his god. After years of the creature hitting Henry with one hand and comforting with the other he made the young man so desperate and frightened while at the same time needed and special that Henry believed the ebb and flow of Dick Romans emotions were almost normal.

Henry watched the boys fall to the wayside, most of them killed, eaten or discarded. As the years went by he became desensitized as he was force to help with the cruelty and disposal.

Henry thought nothing could soften his heart anymore until he was introduced to Sam and Dean Winchester. He didn't want to but little by little watching the loyalty and steadfast love between the brothers touched him.

He thought just maybe Dean would have been the one boy to stand up to Dick and escape, when Dean was injured his heart ached for him. Now watching Dean struggling to come up with a way to escape and knowing he was working under diminished capacity was too much for him to just sit back and let the boy fall and end up like him.

…

Henry watched Dean wandering again lost in the books. He forgot the clue that he was given and now Henry was going to just help realizing that Dean's mind wasn't retaining short term information like it should.

"Dean stop."

Dean clutched his notebook to his chest and eyed the man, "Why…what are you gonna do to me?"

Henry's was full of mixed emotions, " If I help you he's going to know, I suppose he's just going to kill me but I don't have a life anyway so I don't have much to lose."

Dean gripped the notebook tighter, "I don't want you to get hurt again because of me."

Henry took Dean's notebook away and held his hands, "Do you think if I tell you something you would remember?"

Dean started to cry again, he had little control over his emotions, "I don't know."

"Try to listen carefully to me, if Sam and this angel love you so much do you really need a spell? If you just went into the water and prayed for Castiel wouldn't he come for you?"

"I think so but Dick said they left together, they don't want me because I'm broken."

Henry handed him a life jacket, "Dean I think they would never stop loving someone like you broken or not." Henry figured it was the end for him but he wanted to do one good thing before it happened and helping Dean was the best thing he could think of to go out on.

"Tonight you put this on, you go out in the water and you pray like you never prayed before, hell you beg and cry and yell. I'm going to keep the staff inside, can you swim baby?"

Dean was already feeling confused but tried his best to focus, "Yeah."

"Don't forget the jacket just in case."

Henry took the notebook and wrote down everything step by step then handed it to Dean, "Read this over if you forget." He watched the pretty green eyes look over the page carefully then Dean looked up and smiled, "Thank you."

…

Castiel vanished and searched each property; none of them were protected from angels. Warehouses, companies, factories, office buildings, franchises, homes and mansions, a racing track, casinos and everything else you could imagine he owned but even though the angel searched the world over there was no Dean Winchester to be found.

He came back and Sam ran to him hugging the being, "Did you find him?"

"Sam the only places blocked was Malo or Roman Island and his main mansion here. Everything else was open to me, he can't possibly be at that mansion now could he Sam?"

Sam remembered the miles of property he owned and the thought Dean being buried there made Sam's gut tighten, "If he's there it has to be a room we missed…god Cas we only went thought a fraction of that house. What if…"

"No Sam he's not dead. If Dean is on the island I can only get you so far until you find a way to let me in or bring Dean where I can get you both easily."

"Ok Cas tomorrow we go back to the mansion and then the island."

…..

Castiel made Sam supper but they both ate little, instead they went over their plans and packed what they thought Sam might need. Afterward Castiel made Sam go to his bed while the angel went to the little bed by the window.

Sam couldn't sleep, he was worried about his brother, "Cas…Dean is going to be ok right?"

"If he's not Sam I will fix it, get some sleep now. You know I'm here for you if you need me."

Sam rolled over on his side and faced the angel's bed, "What if I need you now?"

Before he knew it Sam crawled on top of him grasping their cocks together and sliding against the warm body beneath, "Cas let me in."

The angel spread his legs and allowed Sam inside. They began to kiss, mingling tongues as Sam moaned into the warm, sweet mouth, he thrust his cock quickly not able to hold back.

A young trigger ended the encounter as quickly as it started; Sam trembled and hugged the being tightly crying out first for Castiel and then Dean.

Castiel knew he never should have allowed it but he did and loved every minute of the strong, young body making him feel good, filling him up and loving him.

Maybe Sam was pretending it was Dean but maybe not. Castiel decided it didn't matter. He grunted with each thrust biting his bottom lip and staring directly into Sam's hazel eyes. When he felt Sam shudder and collapse his long, sweaty body over his Castiel felt contented and stroked the soft hair like a favored pet.

Afterward Sam didn't move, he clung to the warmth beneath him and enjoyed the strong arms protectively encompassing his thin frame.

Castiel decided he would go first, "I love you Sam."

Sam was surprised the angel was that bold but it made him happy and happiness was in short supply, "I love you too Cas."

There was no going back after that, no do over or saying he was sorry. Castiel had let Sam in and would deal with the consequences later. He would confess his sin to Dean and take the punishment. If Dean told him to leave he would do it so the brothers could have their own relationship without his interference.

…

Henry watched hidden in the trees to be sure Dean was alright and he remembered what to do.

He already told the staff no one was allowed out the house under orders from Dick Roman. Henry had gone that far and another lie or act of defiance wouldn't make a difference for him now.

…..

Dean waited until dark then put on a life jacket, he waded off the shore and prayed out loud, "Castiel I'm here on an island but I don't know where I am. It's been so long without you and Sammy. Maybe no one is even looking for me now…are you alive?"

Dean waited a moment then tried again, " Cas please I can't take it anymore, if I don't hear from you, if no one saves me then I give up."

Dean floated in the warm water watching the star filled sky, he thought of how many nights he spent outside watching them and praying but Castiel never came. "Castiel come on this is it, if you don't come I'm dead."

Dean was exhausted but and he gave the angel one last chance. Dean was crying now shedding prayerful tears, Dean screamed as loud as he could, "Castiel!"

…..

Castiels eyes snapped open and he bolted up knocked Sam to the floor, he heard him clearly and knew exactly where he was, "Dean!"

Sam got up unsteadily and held his head, "What about him Cas, did you have a dream?"

"Sam I hear him calling me, Dean is alive!

Sam looked around disoriented for a moment until it sunk in, "Dean…Dean!"

Castiel was already gone.

TBC


	32. Cradle Of Wings

Dean was searching the night sky, "It's true… you both left me."

Dean floated on his back and spotted a shooting star, he wondered if the afterlife was this peaceful. His only regret before he died was leaving Sam and his angel.

Suddenly Dean saw a figure blocking out the moon.

Castiel swooped down and landed in the water. The angel pulled off the life jacket and wrapped Dean tightly in his wings then lifted him above the hellish nightmare.

They hovered there over the cerulean water and under the stars as Castiel kissed the slack mouth, "Dean, speak to me."

"I'm dead and you came to get me…take me away."

"No Dean you're alive and we found you."

Dean rested there in the cradle of the angels wings, just before they vanished Castiel bent down and pressed his forehead to his lovers, "I failed you for so long but that will never happen again."

….

Henry had the honor of watching the rescue that night on the beach, the angel soaring from out of nowhere and scooping Dean up from the water.

Henry saw the massive black wings wrapping tightly around him as they spun briefly over the moonlit waves then shot higher in the sky. He watched them together outlined by stars and Henry had to catch his breath as his eyes traveled over the figures locked together.

It was the single most beautiful moment of his life and Henry knew if he died tomorrow seeing that tender embrace made it all worthwhile.

The young man sat down in the sand and started to drink, he had every intention of being so drunk that he passed out and hopefully wouldn't feel anything when Dick Roman killed him.

…..

"Wake up! Wake up you useless piece of gutter trash…Henry get up!"

Henry felt a kick to the ribs then strong hands shaking him, his eyes felt glued shut but he forced them open, "Mister Roman?"

Dick put a hand over Henry's throat, "Where is he?"

Henry closed his eyes again and smiled, "Gone with the angel…saved."

Dick stood up with his hands on his hips trying to slow his breathing, " How did he know to leave the shore…how did he Henry?"

Henry kept his eyes closed, "I did it, I thought if I did one act that could help someone worthy maybe I could get a little redemption. Kill me now I know you're going to anyway."

Dick grabbed him by the arms and dragged him back to the bedroom dropping him on the floor. "I should kill you."

Henry struggled up still slightly drunk, he held out his arms and smiled, "Do it."

The tongue lashed out running over the monsters face and neck.

Henry squeezed his eyes shut tight as the leviathan unhinged its jaw and the chasm opened baring the teeth.

It was about to kill the young man but then monster hesitated and returned to being Dick Roman. He was angry with himself for not doing what needed to be done, instead he backhanded Henry into a wall and stormed off.

...

Dick pushed Henry in the plane and slammed him into a seat, Henry looked up at him bleary eyed and sick, "Why don't you kill me I'm ready."

Dick traced the fine bones of his face and smiled, "Because that's what you want."

Henry leaned forward gagging as Dick Roman held the air sickness bag for him, "Your fucking useless you know that? Do you think it's all over now, that they get to live happily ever after while you martyr yourself trying to get forgiveness from the big boy upstairs?"

Henry finished vomiting and Dick folded the bag handing it to his assistant, "Throw this out and bring some ginger ale."

"I know where I'm going Richard, God doesn't forgive the things I did for you."

Dick grabbed the ginger ale and held it up to Henry's lips but he turned away.

"I wanted Dean to live the life I didn't have. You could never understand," Henry looked at him defeated, "Richard would you kill me now?"

Dick forced the ginger ale down his throat while Henry struggled and choked, "Don't be stupid, do you realize what you've done? Now I have to kill that fucking angel, eat Dean and take Sam."

…

Castiel appeared with Dean; Sam turned for the window and went over to the bed as the angel put his brother down.

Every action after that was done quietly and with urgent purpose.

Dean laid there while Sam pulled off his wet clothes and went along gently touching the body of his once robust brother.

The angel held back watching the two of them knowing that this was Sam's turn and the boy didn't want interference from Castiel.

Sam examined bruises, scars and the slight indentation on Dean's head where the skull had healed together.

Sam kept going, not squeamish at all as he rolled Dean gently on his stomach and checked the damage. Dean hid his face and whimpered as his brother touched him.

Sam's face screwed up with pain over the sight, "Dean I'm so sorry."

Sam held him carefully and let Dean cry for what seemed like hours, the thin body was racked with tremors and when Dean couldn't shed another tear he said, "I can't tell you."

Sam noticed his brothers dry, cracked lips, "Cas get me some water." They sat him up and made him drink, Sam had to hold the cup for Dean.

Sam insisted on giving Dean a bath so Castiel ran the water and carried him in, Sam got in first and the angel put Dean in front of him. Castiel brought a glass of orange juice at Sam's request.

Sam asked the angel to leave and shut the door behind him.

…

Dean leaned back against his brother and felt the hands washing him, Sam talked low with reassuring words, "It's all going to change now Dean, I'm going to take care of you…I'm not a kid anymore."

Dean opened his eyes, his voice was weak, "You're not a kid Sammy but I'm still watching out for you."

Sam made him drink the orange juice until it was all gone then he got up and kneeled in front of his brother awkwardly trying to shampoo his hair. He rinsed the shampoo out then leaned in and kissed Dean.

Dean didn't return the kiss, he had a difficult time being touched in any way even from his Sammy.

…

Sam was obsessively checking Dean over to make sure he was clean before he got his brother out of the tub. Sam even brushed Dean's teeth for him despite the weak protests.

When Sam was satisfied Dean was pristine he got out of the tub, toweled himself off and held out his hands, "Come on Dean I'll wipe you down and wrap you up in dad's bathrobe. Cas can check you over then while l cook some spaghetti." Sam was trying to put a normal spin on an abnormal situation.

Dean took Sam's hands struggling to stand then fell back in the water, he looked up frightened as the fog settled into his brain, "Sammy I can't get up."

Sam was disturbed by the normally deep voice coming out like a child, he knew then there was something very wrong with Dean that all the love in the world couldn't fix.

"Cas get in here!"

The angel appeared then lifted Dean out of the tub and toweled him off, Sam slipped Johns robe on his brother and they helped him into bed.

The green eyes looked up and searched the blue with desperation, "Cas, help me."

Sam and Castiel looked at each other and they stepped out of earshot, "Cas he sounds like a kid, why is he shaking like that?"

"Sam the blow to the head damaged Dean badly but please trust me, I will heal him."

…

Castiel stretched out next to Dean and rolled him into his arms, "Dean I'm here do not be frightened."

"Cas can you fix me?"

"Yes now close your eyes and rest."

The angel kissed his forehead, "When you wake up all of this will be gone, the scars, the pain, your mind will be fine Dean, no more tremors."

Sam spooned against the back of his brother, "Cas is going to fix you up good as new…Dean would you like the memories taken away?"

"No Sammy I want them, I have to remember everything."

Castiel kissed his forehead again and Dean fell into a healing sleep, he gave off a slight bluish glow while the angel held him all night long.

Sam eventually fell asleep pressed against Dean holding on tight afraid his brother would vanish into thin air.

…

When morning came Dean was still asleep but Sam was relieved to see he looked much better, the indentation was gone and the bruising and scars vanished.

Sam whispered to Castiel, "Cas is he ok inside?"

"You don't need to whisper, Dean is going to sleep for quite some time. His mind is going to be fine just like before this all happened. He will be teasing you in no time."

Sam smiled, "Good I know that's the most important…I mean inside. A lot of stuff must have happened to him. It did even before he left, Cas you don't have any idea what Dean had to do while they had you locked up."

The angel felt the guilt wash over him, all the failings and weakness on his part Castiel saw as the reason for the pain the brothers experienced.

Sam felt the anger well up as the memories of Dean going out night after night came back to him. Sam carried the guilt of being taken care of like a weight around his neck. "You know if it wasn't for me Dean could have been free of all of it. He's a survivor and I was just a stupid, useless kid Dean had to take care of."

Castiel motioned for Sam to sit at the table while he finished breakfast for him, he put the oatmeal in front of the boy and Sam made a face, "Gross…oatmeal?"

Castiel kissed the top of his head and smiled, "Oh good you are back from your pity party," He dropped some raisins and brown sugar on top of it, "there, now it is edible."

Sam mixed it around and dug in, "Where did you learn that…pity party?"

"I watch television Sam I'm not a total cultural idiot."

Sam gave the angel his dimples, "Thank you Cas for saving Dean and fixing him."

"Don't thank me, you got me inside so I could find the map. Honestly Sam I feel like if I had been brave and went against my assignment none of this would have happened. I would have taken you both out of here."

"No Cas if you hadn't come to us at all it still would have happened, Dean would be dead and I might be out there having to sell myself. You're a hero, you did your job until you couldn't anymore. You were tortured because of us…because you love Dean so much, I think that's very brave."

Castiel looked over at the sleeping teen, "Sam I have to tell Dean what we did at some point but that it was my fault."

"I know but Dean will understand, Cas I wanted to have sex with you so it's not your fault."

Castiel watched Sam eat the entire bowl, his appetite was back now and the angel was pleased, then he remembered something that needed to be done.

"Sam I need to go and do something very important but I will be back."

Sam panicked, "No Cas, don't go after Dick by yourself, we have a plan…I'm the bait remember?"

"I'm not Sam but it's something that has to be done before Dick gets back to his property and if I don't do this I could never forgive myself."

Sam grabbed him around the waist, "Come back promise me, Dean and I can't be left alone again. No matter what Cas I won't lose you."

"You won't I promise."

TBC


	33. Holy Fire

The angel appeared at the stables, he gathered every single boy into the main room. Castiel was shocked to see they ranged in age from around ten to late teens.

The boys whispered to each other and watched the angel warily waiting for something terrible to happen. They didn't know if he was a leviathan, the group changed constantly as boys were used up and replacements brought in.

"I am Castiel an angel of the Lord here to free you from this life. I see in your hearts where you each wish to be. Trust me to take you somewhere safe and you can start your lives over."

One boy bravely stepped forward, "Will I go to my parents, I miss them." Castiel nodded, "Yes if that is where you want to go." The boy hugged him around the waist and thanked him, the boy finally had someone to trust.

The angel vanished and returned bringing them one by one with lightening speed to safe places.

When it was done he set the stable on fire as a message to Dick Roman then went back to Sam and Dean.

…..

Dick Romans limousine pulled up in front of the manor and Henry got out first opening the door for his employer. The new caretaker hurried up apologizing for things Dick knew nothing about yet.

"So sorry sir, it sounds crazy but an angel took the stable boys away and burned the building down. Nothing I could do to stop it…also Mister Roman there was a break in we just discovered, they got into your private office."

When he smiled at the man the caretakers blood ran cold, a smile from Dick Roman could mean anything, "Well now what should I do about your failings? How will all the other people that work for me view my position if I don't make an example of you?"

"Mister Roman sir I apologize it won't happen again."

"Your right it won't."

Henry closed his eyes as the screaming started and he didn't open them until it stopped.

….

Sam's phone rang and when he saw who it was he panicked, "Cas it's him we aren't ready!"

"Answer it Sam or he will come here."

Sam answered it and his throat went dry, he croaked, "Hello?"

Dick's voice dripped with honey, "Sam my pretty baby how is my first addition to my stable of zero doing?"

"Leave us alone."

Dick hissed, "You tell that angel I'm coming for him…tell him that…"

Castiel grabbed the phone and growled, "I am telling you I have no restraints now, I am coming for you Dick Roman and you will pay for everything, I will end you."

Castiel hung up and handed the phone to Sam, "I can't do this with you Sam."

"Cas we have to kill him, we have to follow the plan."

Castiel studied the boys face still sweet despite the horrors, "Sam I won't risk you get hurt…I love you too much."

"As long as he's alive Dean will never be safe, this time he's going to kill him and take me."

Castiel picked up the blade, "Very well Sam lets finish this."

Dean was still sleeping deeply when Sam and Castiel left.

…

They appeared outside the boarded up window where they first entered, "Sam circle to the front and ring the bell, I will enter here."

Sam walked around to the front and almost immediately Henry was there with the door open, "Sam, go away!"

A voice came from the foyer, "Who is it Henry?"

Henry sighed and shook his head knowing it was too late for Sam, "Sam Winchester sir."

"Is anyone with him?"

"No sir."

"Give me a moment then bring him to my office."

Henry brought Sam to the study where Dick Roman was sitting in a large leather chair, "Sit Sam and let's chat shall we?"

Sam sat down and looked around the dimly lit room, "I want to make a deal."

Deals intrigued the creature and he leaned forward sliding his hands across the desk smiling at Sam, "Really? What kind of deal…you know you can't kill me Sam so if this is another trick…"

"No trick, you can have me."

"Sam I can have you anyway, why would I deal?"

"Because I won't fight you, I'll tell Cas to take Dean and leave. I'm a virgin, I know you like that right? I don't think I'm a bad looking kid."

Dick sat back and contemplated the offer, "The angel backs off…but I lose Dean."

"Yes."

"Take your clothes off I want to see you nude, see what I'm getting."

Sam hadn't bargained for that but he did it without hesitation covering himself with his hands.

The monsters eyes were black and lustful, "Come on Sam all of it, show me those goodies."

Sam moved his hands away and stared at the wall, Dick walked over and knelt in front of him, "I have to say for fourteen you really hit puberty like a race horse and kept on going! Very impressive, nice muscle tone, long and lean, big cock and balls like your brother and the gingery pubic hair? Love it!"

He ran his tongue over Sam's cock and balls then buried his nose in the soft curls breathing in the traces of body wash and young musk, Sam squeezed his eyes shut, "_Please Cas…I can't wait much longer…can't take this."_

Dick dropped his head backward and only the whites of his eyes were showing, "Sam…soooo sweet and fresh."

The head snapped back up and he twirled his finger, "Turn around and spread yourself open."

Sam turned and bent over pulling his cheeks open, his voice was shaking now, "See I'm a virgin."

Dick ran his tongue up the cleft and prodded the bud of muscle, "Sam I don't think my cock would even fit in there but once I get it broken open the rest is easy."

Sam despised the next part, "Do you…do you want me now?" It was never meant to get that far, this was supposed to happen in the bedroom not in his office and Sam was supposed to be saved before he touched him.

Dick stood up and winked at Sam, "Eager to get that boring old virginity out of the way. I like a kid with spunk…pun intended."

Dick led Sam to his bedroom and gestured to the bed, "Dean got me over my cleanliness issue, no shower required I find I acquired a taste for sex at any time with him."

He cracked Sam on the rear, "Sam I am going to destroy you."

Sam lay on his back and closed his eyes, when Dick stripped he was already erect and immediately started kissing Sam.

"You are so beautiful, just top notch Sam. I'm going to love this…Dean was damaged anyway, gave in like a pussy."

Sam was furious over the insult but bit his tongue.

"I bet you are a real screamer. I can't wait to get you on a couple of spreader bars."

Sam couldn't take it anymore and yelled, "Cas now!"

Castiel appeared behind him and swung the blade, Sam quickly rolled onto the floor as it came down severing the head from the body.

Both parts were already regenerating as the angel cauterized them shut with Holy Fire then quickly put the head and body in separate linen cloth wrapping the parts tightly and binding them with jute.

Castiel called for the only angel he thought would show up but he had his doubts, he called for Gabriel and waited.

His brother appeared but kept his distance, "I can't believe you called me, you must be pretty desperate Castiel."

Castiel rushed him slamming the angel into the wall, "You owe me."

He pointed to the wrapped body and head, "Dispose of this leviathan properly, it is the least you can do."

Gabriel could see the charred stumps staining the linen, "Holy Fire…very nice!"

"I don't need your praise I need your help, finish the burning and scatter the ashes to the cosmos. Redeem yourself to me and be useful."

Gabriel cocked his head and smiled, "I suppose I do owe you." He vanished with the two parts.

….

Sam went back to the office and put his clothes on. Castiel spoke softly to the traumatized teen, "Sam it's done."

Sam was shaking as he sat on the floor and put on his sneaker, "He put his mouth all over me…Cas where were you?"

"Sam this is why I didn't want to bring you here, I'm sorry I've failed you again. After Dean wakes up and you both feel ready to go I'll find a place for you both that is safe and then leave you."

Sam started crying, the tears came too easily lately and he couldn't face the angel, "That isn't what I want, don't leave Cas," Sam scrubbed his eyes with his sleeve, "everyone leaves us…Dean and I need you and not just because you can do things for us but because we love you."

"Alright Sam, if you both want me."

The angel scooped him up, grabbed the blade and appeared back at the apartment.

…..

Sam shook Dean awake, he watched the pretty green eyes flutter open and looked around, "Sammy?"

"Yeah Dean it's me…we did it, Cas and I got rid of him."

Everything flooded back and Dean's full memories were restored, he held up his hands and saw they were rock steady.

Dean sat up and looked at them both wanting to tell them what happened but he couldn't. He wanted to ask what happened but he wasn't ready for the answer.

….

The three stayed together at the apartment taking the time to let Dean feel some version of normal before they left. The trio felt there were no immediate threats to overcome. Dean was afraid to leave the apartment and be around other people, too scared to drive or start over so they gave him the time he needed and took baby steps to heal him.

First they had Dean call and order a pizza, a very small thing but for Dean it was climbing a mountain, "Yeah…I want to order a pizza…ok a large with pepperoni and mushrooms…my brother and friend will pick it up….ok bye." Dean hung up, the sweat was running down his face as he clung to the table.

Sam rubbed his back and smiled, "That was great Dean see its all ok."

Dean sat down to gather himself, Castiel knelt in front of him but when he went to touch Dean he flinched, "Sorry I have problems with people touching me, I'm fucked up Cas."

"It's alright Dean I don't take it personally."

"I want you both to touch me but sometimes it's hard to take I just want to be alone and I know it's not normal."

Sam sat on the floor next to his brother and touched just the denim on Dean's jeans, "It's ok, you're going to get better."

….

Sam and Castiel went to pick up the pizza and on the way back Sam reached out and held the angels free hand, "Maybe tonight Dean will sleep in the big bed with us."

"I don't know Sam, let him do it if he feels comfortable."

Sam stopped walking, "Cas wait I want to ask you something."

"Yes?"

"Tonight if Dean doesn't want to sleep in the big bed would you meet me in the laundry room and we could talk?"

Castiel knew it was more than conversation Sam wanted.

"I think we need to think of Dean."

Sam started to walk again, "I know…when will he want me again?"

"I don't know."

…

Gabriel finished torching Dick Romans body then picked up the linen wrapped head and was about to burn it when he heard talking, "Gabriel the coward leaving two boys and his brother to die…tell me coward, what does your father think of all that?"

Gabriel watched the mouth move under the linen, "Go ahead Dick get those last jabs in while you can." He raised the head and focused his gaze upon it then Dick started to speak once again, "What's it like being you…too afraid to buck the system, no loyalty to Castiel…do you know what they did to him because of you Gabe you fucking useless piece of shit angel?"

He lost his concentration and Dick could feel the tremble in the fingers that held his neck, "Rape…they raped him, burned off his wings…oh and sometimes they just tore them off. I imagine the rape was the hardest for Castiel since he's such a damn Pollyanna."

There was a flash of light behind Gabriel just as he was about to finish off Dick Roman for good. He turned and there was Castiel, "Brother I was going to finish did you want to do the honors?"

Castiel took the head and smiled, "Thank you."

Gabriel watched his face and something wasn't quite right, "Cas…Castiel ?" He took a step back, "Oh crap…"

TBC


End file.
